I once had a sugar daddy

It was nothing wierd. My father had type II diabetes.

I'm a pretty badass sugar daddy myself...

I have diabetes and 3 kids.

What do you call a sugar daddy with no money?

A splenda daddy.

A man who pretends to be rich in order to attract pretty, young women is not a "Sugar Daddy".

He's an artificial sweetner.

I always wanted to be a sugar daddy....

...turns out I only have the money for being some sort of artificial sweetener daddy.

My friend said he wanted to be a sugar daddy in the future.

I told him, "Boy, with how broke you are, you'd be a splenda stepfather."

What do you call a sugar daddy in a wheel chair?

Meals on wheels

My daughter asked me what a sugar daddy was.

I gave her £2000 to never ask me that again.

Starting a sugar daddy dating site for people into 80s music.

I'm calling it Girls Just Wanna Have Funds.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm not really rich enough to be a sugar daddy

But I got talking to this young girl and I sort of hinted that I could help her through college in exchange for a few favours. She looked me up and down as cool as you like and said, "Listen: the most I'm ever going to do for a sad old creep like you is let you undo my shirt once or twice a week. An...

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A girl and her sugar daddy are in bed and she's about to orgasm...

"Daddy I'm cumming!"
"Hi Cumming, I'm dad"

What do you blow to make a wish?

A sugar daddy!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does Charlie Bucket call Willy Wonka?

His Sugar Daddy.

I brought cake and candy to my son's birthday celebration.

And that, officer, is why I told the hostess at Chuck E. Cheese's that I was the sugar daddy looking for my party boy.

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