UPJOKE
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Mama Jokes

Yo mama so ugly

When she sits on her phone, it unlocks.

Yo mama so fat...

Yo mama so fat she has her own gravity

But she so ugly people are still repelled by her

Yo mama so fat

her pronouns are Hershey

Yo mama so dumb

that she spent 5 hours staring at a glass of orange juice because it said ‘concentrate’ on the package.

Yo mamas so ugly

Her portraits hang themselves

Yo mama joke I thought of it

Yo mama is so fat and old that she’s still eating from the last supper.





Edit : Jesus Christ this blew up. Didn’t know so many of you had to release yo mamas from your system.

Yo Mama so fat, when she breaks a plate…

It’s usually of the tectonic variety.

Yo Mama So Fat...

She went skydiving and got stuck.

Yo mama's so fat

she went out in high heels and came back in flip flops

Yo mamas so fat....

She starts the alphabet with O B C D

Yo mama so old

Her chiropractor a paleontologist

Yo mama so fat...

The only scale she could use is the Richter Scale

Yo mama so slow...

it took her 9 months to make a joke.

Yo mama is so fat that…

She needs to wear a watch on both wrists because of time zone difference.

Yo mama so fat

I swerved to miss her and ran out of gas

Yo mama so fat. . .

I swerved my car to avoid hitting her and ran out of gas.

Papa Bear and Mama Bear are getting a divorce

You know Goldilocks and the 3 bears? Well mama bear and papa bear are getting a divorce. In court they bring in baby bear. The judge puts baby bear on the stand and asks him who he'd like to live with?

"Well not papa bear he beats me," says baby bear.

"So mama bear?" asks the Judge....

Yo mama so fat

When she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up

Yo Mama so fat that when she slid into my DMs….

My phone ran out of space.

Yo mama so fat

when she eats Taco Bell, she gets the walks.

Yo mama so dumb...

...she tells yo mama jokes to you and your siblings.

Yo mama...

So dyslexic even her blood is Type-O

Yo mama is so fat, that if she could communicate with the dead…

… she wouldn’t be called a medium, but an extra large.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama so fat, they did a story on how fat she was on the channel 3 news

I switched to channel 7 and you could still see her ass in the corner of the screen

Yo mama so fat...

When she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.


Gimme your best yo mama jokes.

Every yo mama joke has been done thousands of times by thousands of people...

.... Just like yo mama.

Yo mama’s so fat

When she skips a meal, the stock market drops.

Yo mama was so fat

It takes a week to mow her burial plot.

Yo mama so fat

She has a watch for every time zone she's in,
When she walks past the tv, you miss 8 seasons,
She beat galactus in a planet-eating contest,
Thanos couldn't snap her out of existence,
Flash died before he could do a lap around her
And she ate a black hole because she was hungry

Your mama is so fat…..

On one edge of her passport photo, it says continued on next page.

Yo mama so fat

she outta breath from taking the escalator.

yo mamas so fat

i pictured her in my head and she broke my neck

Yo mama so ugly...

she walked into a haunted house and came out with a job application!

Yo Mama Joke by a Physics Professor

Yo Mama is so fat you can see the objects that are directly behind her

Yo mama jokes are classics

They’re kinda outdated, yet still enjoyed by many.

Just like yo mama.

Papa Mole, Mama Mole, and Baby Mole

There was a papa mole, a mama mole, and a baby mole tunneling through the ground one right after the other. They were digging and digging and digging when all of a sudden, Bam! The papa mole ran into a wall.

The papa mole was a bit shaken up. He stuck his head out and saw it was Waffle House...

Yo Mama So Fat

When she takes a bath she doesn't use any water and it still overflows!

Yo mama's so fat

when she sat on a memory foam it forgot

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A group of teenagers were getting into a yo mama fight

And everyone was getting into it except the indian boy at the back.

When asked why he wouldn't participate
He replied: "I too would make fun of your mothers but in my culture disrespecting cows is frowned upon."

Yo mama is so ugly

Bill Cosby gave her a roofie-less drink.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Young Virgin Couple

A young virgin couple are finally wed. Each one is nervous about the impending night, but neither are willing to admit or ask each other about it.

Wondering what to do first, the young man calls his father.

"Pop, what do I do first?"

"Get naked and climb into bed," his father...

Yo mama might have covid.

She has no taste, nobody wants to be around her, and she really should put on a mask.

Yo Mama's so old ...

her dating service is named Carbon.

Depression/suicide jokes are basically yo mama jokes of our generation — they're lazy, unfunny and useless

Just like me

Yo mama so fat

she looked at the menu and said OK

Yo mama so FAT

She can't store files larger than 4 GB.

Yo mama’s so stupid...

She cried onto a ketchup packet because it said “tear here.”

Yo mama so fat that

She uses Macrowave instead of microvave.

Yo mama's so narcissistic...

She makes cupcakes for your class on her birthday!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama is so dumb...

...She refused to give your dad a blowjob because she thought he'd lose his unemployment benefit.

Yo Mama so old...

Her first cruise was on Noah's Ark.

Yo mama is so ugly

Yo mama is so ugly she tried to enter an ugly contest, but they said, "Sorry, no professionals."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo' mama is so fat

That she sends me nudes via torrent

Best YO MAMA JOKE ACCORDING TO ME

yo mama is so stupid that she went for an archery contest and aimed for the ground and missed

Your mama's so fat...

She's got dollars in one pocket and yen in the other.

Yo mama so fat

Every time she's about to jump in the pool God says: "Noah, get the boat NOW"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Wedding night

Sophia had just gotten married, and being a traditional Italian girl living under the watchful eye of her mother, she remained a virgin up until she and her husband took their wedding vows…

On their wedding night, the newlyweds stayed at her mother's house, and Sophia was nervous. Her mother...

Yo mama soo dumb

Yo mama soo dumb she waves at train to stop

Yo' Mama's so Fat...

I tried to drive around her and I ran out of gas!

Yo mama's so fat

When she goes to the beach the tide comes in, but she's so ugly that it goes back out

[Edit] typo

Yo mama's so fat...

...she has to upgrade her data plan every time she sends a selfie.

I bought a shirt and some neckwear from Ebay that used to belong to the guy from the Mamas & the Papas

All the sleeves are brown and the tie is gray

Your mama is so ugly

Your dad wakes up with morning wouldn’t.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo Mama is like a bowling ball

She likes it when you fill all her holes and when your done with her you can throw her in the gutter and the bitch always comes back for more.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama so fat

The strip club calls her Hitler after all the damage she's done to the poles.

Your mama so ugly

Your mama so ugly she can scare Cujoh off a meat truck

Yo mama so old...

In school, history was called present.

Yo mama so ugly…

Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!

Your mama is so ugly

She fell into a gorilla exhibit and got shot.

Yo mama jokes thread

What are some of the best "Yo mama" jokes of recent times?


I'll go first: Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

Mama always said life is like a box of condoms

She had neither when she had me

Yo mama's so fat

Her nose can't even run




Came up with this myself and was quite proud

Yo mama PG-13

Yo mama so fat your father died in 69.

Ten little monkeys jumping on the bed, one jumped off and bumped his head. Mama called the doctor and the doctor said

We don’t accept your insurance.

yo mama so cheap

She tried to bargain with a vending machine

Yo mama so fat

That scientists call her "The Great Attractor"

Your mama is old...

She used to share a corner with Mary Magdalen.

Yo mama is so fat..

..when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.

Your mama so fat…….

When she stepped on the scale, it said one at a time please.

Yo mama so fat...

...she had an heart attack while running an app.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the Mama Tomato say to the Baby Tomato when it fell behind?

Nothing. They're fucking tomatoes.

Yo mama so ugly…

Even Ripley couldn’t believe it.

Yo Mama so OLD

She met Gary Oldman when he was Gary Numan.

\-MPL

Yo mama so stupid

When she gives someone a piece of her mind, it's considered particle decay.

Yo mama so fat

The earth was actually flat until they buried her.

Yo mama so poor…

… that ducks throw bread at her.

Yo' mama is so dirty...

She did the Tide Pod challenge and vanished

Your mama so dumb

She climbs over a glass wall to see what’s on the other side!

Yo mama so old...

... I told her to act her age, and she died.

Yo Mama's so hairy...

Her dandruff shampoo is called "Heads, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes"

Yo Mama so fat, You can hide behind her back and still be visible...

Because of Gravitational Lensing.

Yo mama so ugly

Yo momma so ugly the whole world faked a virus and ruined the economy just to make her wear a mask

Medieval Yo Mama joke

Saw this joke today, it’s from the 1400’s

A young Florentine was going down to River Arno with one of
those nets in which they wash wool, and met a frolicsome boy,
who, out of fun, asked him what birds he was going to catch with
that net of his? "I am going to the Brothel's outlet,"...

Your mama's so obsessive-compulsive

when she dropped her toothbrush in the toilet, she went out and got a new toilet

Yo mama so dumb, When the doctor told her she was pregnant,

She asked, "Is it mine?"

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