Face Mask Jokes - 43 Hilarious Face Mask Jokes

Just been in to Starbucks and the barista was wearing a face mask

I asked "Why are you wearing a surgical mask?"

She said "I'm not, it's a coughy filter."

They’re running out of face masks in China

No big supplies there.

A big nose is no excuse to not wear a face mask

After all, I wear pants...

The doctor on the radio said to treat your face mask like you do your underwear

So I turn in inside out every day

I have started using the left cup of a bra as a face mask when going outside.

It's so I won't look like a right tit.

when did you start wearing woman's panties for a face mask?

Since my wife found them in the glove box.

PSA do not wear a washington wizards face mask.

CDC studies have shown they provide no defense

Today at the pharmacy I saw a woman without a face mask buying a pregnancy test.

She clearly isn’t a fan of protection

Just a question for people that put the face mask when they're alone in their car,

Do you put the condom when you're alone in bed?

I was wondering why my face mask crashed...

Turns out it's one of those WiN95 masks.

You can recycle an old brassiere into a face mask. It is important to remember to only use the left cup...

otherwise you will end up looking like a right tit.

I feel so bad for the deaf people who need to read lips to communicate, because of all of the face masks right now.

Let's give them all a moment of silence.

Now that I'm wearing a face mask all day, half my face is constantly hot.

Not too bad being a 5/10

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm gonna lose my mind if someone says they cant breathe or talk wearing a face mask

I had a girl in my basement for seven months wearing a ball gag and she's fine

LPT for people like me who couldn't breath with a face mask on

..
..
Take it out of the plastic bag first. I haven't felt like I was suffocating since I learned this.

I just bought a face mask for my put duck

Nothing flashy but it fits the bill

All the Asians who’ve been wearing face masks are laughing now

I assume

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There are people cutting bras in half to make face masks now

Some of them look like right tits.

A guy with a face mask is leaning up against the outer wall of a Wells Fargo bank.

A police officer comes and says, "What are you doing?"

"I'm holding up this bank," the man says.

"Very funny. Now move along."

The man walks away, and the bank falls down.

Many people underestimate the benefits of wearing face masks. Besides preventing the transmission of the Covid virus,

we don't have to see your ugly face anymore.

People wear masks that cover o my half their faces in the bank and they are “responsible” ...

But I wear a full-face mask in the bank and suddenly I’m “dangerous” and “a criminal”?

The Hypocrisy!

Back in college

Back in college...

I'll never forget back when I was in college. There was this guy.. he had a long Scandinavian name, none of us could pronounce it, so we just called him Oe. Anyway, Oe and I were in fencing class together, we thought it would be an easy A.

Now Oe, he was a big guy, ...

Yo mama so stupid

She wears a face mask on a zoom meeting

Bruce Willis has admitted to making an "error of judgement" after reportedly being asked to leave a Los Angeles store for refusing to wear a face mask. Apparently, he wasn't even aware of the effects of his actions until a young boy walked up to him and said...

"I see dead people."

Zorro

Zorro goes to a bar only wearing his face mask. He asks the bartender for a drink and then asks him if he knows who he is. The bartender replies that he has never seen him before. Zorro gets mad, puts on his black hat and his black cape and asks the bartender one more time if he knows who he is. The...

10 years ago I went to the opticians for an eye test. He asked to look into this big machine & tell him what I could see. I said I can see a fella eating a bat, closed pubs & everyone seems to be wearing face masks!

The optician said I don't need glasses as I have 2020 vision!

I get why Karen’s hate wearing face masks

Because they make mouth breathers smell their own breath

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Thoughtful Gesture

N Y Governor Cuomo assured the public that he always wore his face mask while sexually harassing his accusers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife asked me if I noticed anything different about her

***So I came home just when the news of the Pandemic was first hitting the news***

***Her:***

Notice anything different about me?

***Me:***

Mmmmmmmm. You dyed your hair?

***Her:***

No!

***Me:***

You wearing a new dress?

***Her (getting f...

Yo momma is so ugly.....

Walmart started requiring her to wear a face mask 10 years before they even heard of coronavirus.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Protection

A girl and a guy have sex once in the dark and they both agreed to use protection

A few months later she finds out she’s pregnant

She asks him if he used a condom that night they had sex, and he says “no”

She replies “but we agreed to use protection”, and he replies “I did, I ...

A Republican walks up to a Democratic with a face mask and say, “do you know what I say to sheep like you?...

Whatever the Republican Party tells me too say.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Well, it finally happened today, I knew it would eventually so I was ready.

I came out of Walmart with my mask on and keeping six feet away from everyone, I pushed my cart to my car, all the while wearing my face mask. A woman was getting out of her car next to me with no mask. As I'm putting groceries into my car she says, "Let me guess - you're a liberal - ‘cause that ma...

This is an important message from Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe:

Having to wear a face mask along with your glasses?
You may be entitled to condensation.
Call us today!

If this isn't in a movie in the next two years then this year has been a waste!

Setting: Our hero, tied to a chair in a laboratory.
Evil torturer: "So you won't talk, eh?"
Our hero: "You will never make me talk."
ET: "Even if I force you to wear this?" (Whips around. Our hero sees he has a face mask in his hand.)
OH: "No not that! Anything but that. I will tell all....

SHARE before this gets taken down! Reddit, Facebook, and YouTube have been REMOVING posts like this!

The GLOBALISTS and ILLUMINATI have placed facial recognition cameras EVERYWHERE to track you. The only way to stop their plan is to wear a face mask while out in public.

Pass it on!

The 12 Days of Corona

In the year 2020, the pandemic gave to me:
12 Cancelled Plans
11 Face Masks
10 Sanitizers
9 Murder Hornets
8 Zoom Calls
7 Mental Breakdowns
6 Feet Apart
5 Curbside Pickups
4 Quarantines
3 Travel Restrictions
2 Karens Complaining
And a massive shortage of Grocery S...

I heard the FBI and NSA is rejoicing at the rescue of those Thai students.

Now they can go back to monitoring Redditor accounts for "Thai, boys, deep, hole, wet, rubber face mask and sedatives" without all those pesky false positives.

It makes sense that venice has been hit hard by the virus.

where else can you be guaranteed that they won't run out of face masks?

Man with a beard a 100 years ago: "Ok, I'll go chop down some trees."

Man with beard today: " I found a great face mask that's gluten and cruelty free."

The 2020 Football Season

Where you get a penalty for not face masking.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pissed off God by not seeing everyday miracles.

There's an old joke...

There's a flood. A man is standing in knee deep water in his house. Another man in a canoe paddles by and says "Get in I'll row you to safety!"

The man says,"No thanks. I've prayed and God will save me".

The water gets to his chest. Another man in a bass b...

If you ever feel like your life is meaningless

Just remember that someone out there provides Donald Trump with face masks.

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