We were having so much bad luck on our cul-de-sac that the HOA thought we had been cursed. They brought in a witch doctor and druid to scribe protective symbols and runes all over the road...
...well, that's the ward on the street anyway.
An old protective father and his daughters who want dates
Jeremiah is your typical protective farmer and father. He has three daughters, all who’d like to date men but he has never allowed it. Now that they’re all above 18, he decides it’s time to allow them to go on their first dates.
As he sits on his porch, waiting, shotgun in hand around 7:00 PM...
Two men are walking their dogs (a doberman and a chihuahua) when they see a restaurant.
They're pretty hungry, do they decide to head in for a bite to eat. Unfortunately, they see a sign out front that says "NO DOGS ALLOWED".
The man with the doberman says "I know what to do, just follow my lead." He throws on a pair of sunglasses and walks in.
The waiter tells him "I'm s...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
There's an old farmer with 3 beautiful daughters. He is very protective of them and meets every potential suitor at the front door, with a loaded shotgun in his hands.
Sure enough, come Saturday evening there's a knock at the door. The farmer jumps up, throws open the door and points his shotgun at the young man.
The fellow is a little startled, but manages to say "Hi, my name is Joe. I'm here for Flo. I'm here to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?"...
A father and his son are visited by the Child Protective Services. The agent asks the son, "Do you know why we are visiting you today?" The son thought a bit and replied:
Two grandparents are having a phone call talking about their family. One grandparent talks about how proud she is that her granddaughter came to visit her while socially distanced
The other said - “my grandson is so protective of me. He socially distances so much he won’t even call me!”
Today I found out that the electrician didn't connect the protective grounding system at my home.
I was shocked.
I realised at the last minute that i forgot my protective goggles at the nuclear test facility this morning. My line manager saved my vision and shielded me from the intense light!
He's my super visor
A time traveler comes back from the year 2045
I encountered a time traveler today. During my self isolation he came to the door dressed in a hazmat suit. I was of course alarmed when I opened the door to such a site. He quickly explained who he was and asked if he could have just a few minutes of my time. I didn't believe anything he was sa...
Darth Vader built an entire Galactic Empire...
Wearing protective gear in sanitary environment.
But it was all destroyed by a whiny brat without a mask who refused to stay home with his aunt and uncle.
They put a protective casing over the Vietnam Wall.
They're calling it the Maya Lin sheath.