My wife and I disagree about who wears the pants in the relationship
We're very poor
A policeman was interrogating 3 guys who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first guys a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and ...
They call someone who wears boxer shorts a boxer, they call someone who wears swim shorts a swimmer, but what do you call someone who doesn't wear any shorts at all?
I take LSD every time I go to a dubstep concert, but it always wears off.
I think it’s because the bass neutralizes the acid
What do you call an alligator who wears a vest?