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A librarian was organizing her books when a man in a dark suit walked up.

"Hey, I'm Steven. I'll pay you $20000 if you show me your nipples tomorrow."

The librarian was shocked. $20000 was a solid 6 months of work. Dumbfounded, she nodded her head. Steven then left without a word of acknowledgement.

That night, the librarian had a lot trouble falling asleep...

I sold the ugly suit!

When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk's hand was bandaged, but before he could ask about the bandage, the clerk had some very good news for him.

"Guess what, sir?" the clerk said. "I finally sold that terrible, ugly suit we've had so long!"

"Do you mean that ...

A fire hydrant with a suit walks into a bar

The barman says “you look quite extinguished”

What do you call a guy in a plaid suit?

Check mate

What is Ironman underneath his suit?

Stark naked.

Two men in suits walk into a bar

Two men in suits walk into a bar. That night, the bar is hosting an event where people get to test their sommelier skills. The first man is given a wine glass and after swirling it around and drinking it, he says “A red wine. Hints of passion fruit and chestnut.”

After watching the first man...

I'm in line for a promotion and huge pay rise at the Ministry of Defence where I work, after finally perfecting the invisibility suit.

Well they think I have, I've just not turned up for three weeks.

Jeff Bezos’ next big project is to have custom made suits delivered to your house within 48 hours.

It’s called Tailor Swift.

A joke from Taiwan slightly adapted to suit the world better

At a high school reunion, a group of people were having a chat, looking back on their childhood.

One of the guys said: "I used to look really pretty and my mom always took care of my looks, so everyone thought I was a girl."

Another replied: "That definitely caused a lot of troubles!"<...

What do you call a snakeskin suit?

A Hissy Fit

A man walks into a bar and sits down at the counter the bowl of nuts says he has a nice suit when he asks the bartender why they can talk, he says that they are complimentary

well, that joke SUCKED

A man came to a tailor, and tried on a suit.

As he stood before the mirror, he noticed the vest was a little uneven at the bottom.

“Oh,” said the tailor, “don’t worry about that Just hold the shorter end down with your left hand and no one will ever notice.”

While the customer proceeded to do this, he noticed that the lapel of th...

In 50 years: "You know, kids, back in my day, we had to wear masks everywhere we went at one point."

We didn't have those fancy hazmat suits you all wear today

Did you see the latest fashion trend is adhesive based dresses and suits?

From what I heard they’re a bit tacky.

What do you call it when a man in a suit takes some acid?

A business trip

Why isn’t every man in a red suit with a beard Santa?

Because correlation doesn’t imply Claus-ality.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a rum and coke, but the bartender hands him an apple.

"What the hell is this? I ordered a rum and coke," the guy protests.

"Just take a bite of the apple," says the bartender. So, the guy bites the apple, and his eyes light up.

"Hey this apple tastes just like rum! What did you soak it in it?"

The bartender tells him, "Turn it arou...

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An 18 year old girl tells her mom that she has missed her last 2 periods

Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy test. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Crying, cursing and Shouting the mother says, "Who was the bastard that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later...

It is early January of 1793. The commotion outside of the Castle of Versailles is growing louder by the minute. Louis XVI, however, is not bothered, as he is getting his new suit matched, pleated and frilled in his chambers by his favorite tailor.

"Ah yes, Poilon, superb work with the gold thread on my boot leather as per usual. And now: the silk pants with Morocco pearls."

"Y-your Majesty... I think they're breaking down the front wall."

"Nonsense! Clothe me or I shall have you beheaded!"

"Absolutely, your majesty! There...

A young banker decided to get his first tailor-made suit.

So he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit.

A week later he went in for his first fitting.

He put on the suit and he looked fabulous, he felt that in this suit he can do business.

As he was preening himself in front of the mirror, he reached down to put ...

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing a saran wrap suit.

The psychiatrist says "I can clearly see your nuts"

A Mexican man who spoke no English went into a department store to buy socks.

A Mexican man who spoke no English went into a department store to buy socks.

He found his way to the menswear department where a young lady offered to help him.

"Quiero calcetines," said the man.

"I don't speak Spanish, but we have some very nice suits over here," said the sale...

So a politician dies...

And ends up standing in front of the pearly gates. Saint Peter looks at him for a second, flicks through his book, and finds his name.

‟So, you’re a politician...”
‟Well, yes, is that a problem?”
‟Oh no, no problem. But we have recently adopted a new system for people in your line of wo...

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A rabbi and a priest wanted to go for a swim at the beach, but did not have bathing suits with them...

The priest turns to the rabbi and says "why don't we just swim naked, there's no one around, and we'll keep it between ourselves".

The rabbi sees no problem with the idea, and agrees.

Once naked, the rabbi and the priest start walking towards the water, when suddenly out of nowhere see...

Why were oxygen, hydrogen and carbon wearing suites and ties?

Because they are formyl group.

Found out which suit not to bet onwhile I was out in Vegas...

Running with my birthday suit caused quite the losing streak.

To the guy in the wheelchair that stole my camo suit.

You can hide but you cant run.

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A son is choking

A father and his young son go to a restaurant and to keep him occupied, he gives the boy three coins to play with.

Suddenly, the boy starts choking and his face turning blue! The father realises the boy has swallowed the coins and starts slapping him on the back. The boy coughs up two of the ...

A guy found this pig on the side of the road...

Not knowing what to do with it, he brought it over to the police station to ask what he should do with it. The policeman tells him to take the pig to the zoo.
A couple weeks later the same police officer was on highway patrol and he sees the guy in his driving in his convertible with the pig loun...

A cowboy rides into town wearing a paper suit. Paper hat, paper jacket, paper pants and chaps, everything he wore was made of paper.

He wasn't in town five minutes before he was arrested for rustling.

When your date shows up in a white suit that's covered in honey...

You know she's gonna be a keeper.

What does a judge wear to work?

A lawsuit

The Undertaker

So this woman goes to the undertaker to make arrangements for her husbands funeral. She says "Look, I've got some special requests for the service. First off,I want an open casket, so that people can pay their final respects, and secondly I want my husband buried in a blue suit." The undertaker s...

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A guy is constantly suffering from terrible headaches...

A guy is constantly suffering from terrible headaches. He goes to a bunch of doctors, runs any test imaginable, and no one can figure out why. One day a doctor tells him- “I think we figured out a solution, but you’re not going to like it. If we cut off your balls, the constant headache will stop”. ...

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A man has been getting horrible debilitating headaches for a long time a& finally decided to go to the doctor...

And he’s just begging for some relief. “They just won’t stop,” he says. “I can’t do anything, my work is suffering, I can’t spend time with my family, it’s just gotta stop!”

So the doctor does some tests and says, “well there’s good news & bad news. The good news is, I found the problem, ...

I saw a sheep driving a car in a swim suit

It was a Lambikini

A man who just died is delivered to the mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit...

.... The mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.
The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit.
She ...

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If I saw a man in a suit, jump into a phone booth and then Superman jump out. I’d be like “Holy shit!”

It's a fookin phone booth.

Joan, who was rather well-proportioned, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day, but on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.

She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear.

"Excuse me, miss," said the flustered assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn't mind your sunbathing on ...

Two Irishmen walk past a shop window with a sign in it that says, ‘Suits £2 Shirts £1.50!!!’

One Irishman nudges the other with excitement and says, “We are going to make our fortune here today”, and they enter the shop excitedly.

They walk up to the counter and one of the Irishmen says “Can we get 50 suits and 50 shirts please?”

The lady behind the counter looks at them with...

Donald Trump’s lawsuits are like his regular suits,

They all hang on something useless.

When I was a kid, I would dream of being chased through the woods by a tall, unusually thin man in a suit, holding a fruit smoothie in one hand and an electic mixer in the other. His name?

Blender Man.



As a little sub-note to this terrible joke, you may think it funnier that when I first typed it out, my phrasing was "....chased through the woulds....", coz I'm a dolt.

You know why the 2 piece bathing suit was invented?

To separate the dairy section from meat section...

A tailor is talking to a client about his suit

Tailor: We've got your suit all ready to try on. Do you need some help putting it on?

Man: No, that's quite alright I've got it.

Tailor: All right then, suit yourself.

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A woman approaches a man wearing a velvet suit sitting in a fairly crowded bar.

“Hi, my name is Carmen because I’m into cars and men.” says the woman in a flirtatious tone.

The man, seemingly sloshed, looks at her and says, “Hey I’m BeerPussy, can I get you a drink?”

How do you make suit pants last?

Make the jacket first.

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A man's yatch capsizes and he is about to drown in the middle of the ocean

Loudly he proclaimes "Nothing to fear! My lord will save me!"

A tug boat comes by and the sailor spots the man

"It's your lucky day mate, jump in and I'll take you to shore"

The man replies, "thankyou for the kind offer but I have no fear, my lord will save me!"

"Suit you...

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in hell

A man goes to hell. They tell him:

-- You have not sinned too much, so we allow you to choose torture yourself.

He goes into the first room and there people are fried in a frying pan. It doesn't suit him and he leaves.
In the second room needles are inserted under the nails.
“It ...

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A gorilla dies of old age at a zoo right before the zoo opens. It is the only gorilla at the zoo since they are not very profitable.

However, the gorilla is their most popular attraction by far, and they can't afford to go a day without it. So the zoo owner asks one of his workers to wear a gorilla suit they have in storage for an extra $100 a day if he will go in the gorilla cage and pretend to be the gorilla until the zoo can a...

Husband: I lost my wife, she went shopping and hasn't come back yet

Inspector: What is her height?

Husband: I never checked....

Inspector: Slim or healthy?

Husband: Not slim, can be healthy....

Inspector: Colour of her eyes?

Husband: Never noticed.....

Inspector: Colour of hair?

Husband: Not sure, changes with seasons...

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A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:

"Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?”

"We're taking United” was the reply. "We got a great rate!”

“United?" exclaimed the hairdresser. " That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old,...

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A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom, I have someone for you to meet!" Well, it was an immediate hit...

They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Spain.

Their first night there, she undressed as he did.

There she stood nude, except for a pair of black panties, he in his birthday suit.

Looking her over, he asked, "Why the bla...

Kiwis, Trevor and Jeanette, are walking down a street in Bondi in Sydney.

Trevor happens to look in one of the shop windows and sees a sign that catches his eye. The sign said "Suits $10.00 each, Shirts $4.00 each, Trousers $5.00 per pair".


Trevor says to his pal, "Jeanette, look! We could buy a whole lot of those, and whin we get beck to InZid, we could mak...

High End Restaurant

A very well dressed (tailored suit, silk tie, bespoke shoes etc) elegant older customer ordered the very best on the menu resulting in a very large tab.
At the end of the meal he was presented with the bill.
He said to the server, “I don’t know if you remember, but many years ago I was a bit d...

A young man robbed a bank wearing a suit made of many mirrors, but he turned himself in after taking some time to reflect. Luckily, the judge was lenient...

...as he saw a lot of himself in the young man.

Two men in suits of armour enter a hotel...

And ask for a room for two knights.

There's a centaur walking around in a hazmat suit.

He's from the Centaurs for disease control.

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"Sara," said the husband, "'I just I gol a letter from the IRS. How should 1 dress for my meeting? In my Armani suit or in my jeans?"

'Jacob;' his wife replied, "I'm going to tell
you the same thing that my mother told me
when I asked her whether I should wear pajamas or my sexy black negligee on our honeymoon. She said 'Sara, it doesn't matter how
you dress, you'll get fucked either way."

A guy got mad at me for putting a tiny hole in his suit.

Those astronauts are an angry bunch.

Waiting and waiting and waiting...

A guy asks a girl to go to a dance. She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally he gets his suit.

He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally bu...

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My Granddad always lived in poverty and only ever owned one black suit,

he always used to tell my Mum that when he died he would like to be buried in a ‘blue suit’
Of course money was tight so that was never going to happen, anyway when he did finally pass away and he was resting in the funeral home wearing his ‘black suit’ my Mum told the funeral director the sad ...

Spring Fishing

Three guys were out fishing and drinking beer one fine early Spring morning. The lake's ice was now completely melted and the sun shone bright. As one of the guys stood to pee he lost his balance and teetered overboard. When he hadn't surfaced after a few moments one of his friends dove in to try ...

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A man walks into a bar he's never visited before, and settles down to order a drink.

Before long, he notices someone sitting in the corner - a man who appears normal in every regard except that his head is a gigantic orange. Curious, the newcomer asks the bartender "What's up with the guy in the corner? The one with the-" but the bartender interrupts and says "Honestly, your best be...

My wife and I.

My soon to be wife and I are looking at wedding dresses for her.

I said to her I dont care what she wears down the isle. I said best case, you go down the isle wearing a track suit.

She says why... I want something that will look better than that.

I said it would be perfect be...

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Bragging Doctors

Doc 1 bragged, "I had a patient once who blew out his ACL & MCL. I reconstructed his knee, and 2 years later he completed the Boston marathon."

Doc 2 replied, "That's nothing! I had a patient who was in a head-on collision with a truck. I reconstructed virtually all of his joints and more...

A blonde and a brunette are riding in an elevator...

At one point, a man steps aboard with dandruff all over his suit. He gets off a few floors later and the brunette turns to the blonde and whispers-

“Now THAT’S a guy who could really use some Head & Shoulders!”

The blonde looks perplexed:

“How do you give somebody shoulde...

In News Today, a fight was started downtown by a man wearing a suit completely made of mirrors.....

The police said the man apologised once he had time to sit down and reflect.

What do you call a salmon wearing a suit and tie?

Sofishticated.

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Death visits Earth one day to claim the life of John the lawyer

Death visits Earth one day to claim the life of John the lawyer. When He enters John's office, John figures out what's going on and starts laughing hysterically. "What's up with the scythe? You look like an out-of-work farmer", he says. Red with embarrassment, Death storms out.

The next day,...

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A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The Thief says: “Give me your money.” The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: “But, wait! You can’t do that, I am a Congressman!”

The thief replies: “Oh, sorry. Give me MY money.”

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Marital Advice

Mike was going to be married to Jane, so his father sat him down for a little chat. He said, 'Mike, let me tell you something....
On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother,my wife and said, 'Here, try these on!

She did and said, 'These are...

A friend of mine who suffers from long term memory loss went to an employment agency to find what work he's suited for.

Today he became chief moderator for r/jokes.

A Man arrives at his small business first thing on Monday morning. He is met by the local Sheriff and his deputies, armed with a warrant for his arrest and a full search and Seizure of his business and assets.

After he is placed in handcuff and read his rights, a Slim mild mannered man in a suit approaches him and identifies himself as an IRS agent.

IRS Agent: “Are you Mr Jones who resides at 188 Boardwalk Rd?”

Mr Jones: “Yes I am”

IRS Agent: “Do you own and run ‘Jones: Fun house...

My daughter's skirt was getting a lot of attention as I walked her to the school gates, which made me very uncomfortable.

To be honest, I thought it suited me.

There is a lawyer in a 3000$ suit

He is well dressed, his suit is tailored, his shoes are top quality; he is a obviously very important lawyer. He goes back home and his wife is desperate, the sink has been leaking all day.

The lawyer tries to fix it, half an hour passes but he is not able to find a solution, desperate he fin...

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An elderly couple gets married late in life.

After the wedding and the reception, they are in the ‘Honeymoon Suite’ getting ready for bed.

As they are taking their clothes off, the old woman says to her new husband, “Before we get started here, I just want you to know that I have acute angina.”

The old man says, “Well that’s go...

A rich old man died

His widow arrived at the funeral home to meet with the mortician. “Fortunately he was dressed in this fine black suit when he passed, perfect for his burial “ he said. “Yes” replied the widow “he does look good, but I’ve alway thought he looked best in blue”. From her purse she pulled a blank check ...

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A guy goes to a tailor to buy a suit.

The tailor offers a couple of suits but they are too expensive for his taste.
He was going to leave when the tailor remembered that one custom suit he had made for a guy with one arm and one leg that were shorter than his other arm and leg and he never came in to pick it up.
The suit being a c...

My friend is making easy money by selling photos of salmon dressed in suits.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

Why can’t Iron man wear Spiderman’s suit?

He’s dead

How does the Hulk look in a suit?

*Smashing.*

What is the difference between a man riding a tricycle wearing a suit and tie, and another man riding a bicycle wearing jeans and a t-shirt?

Attire.

A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator

He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”



“Yes sir, we do.”



“Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”

Doctor: describe your average night

Patient: they wear suits of armor

Doctor: no, i mean at bed time

Patient: they probably take it off

A policeman arrests a well dressed man in a suit and tie, walking down the Main Street of the city talking on his cell.

The man has a desk strapped to his back, complete with laptop, printer and filing cabinet. He has a dustbin on his head.

“Hold on councillor, I have a policeman trying to arrest me, and I haven’t got a clue why.” He turns and asks “What are the charges?”

“Impersonating an office, Sir”

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A man was sitting on a park bench reading about the pro-trump rioters

Suddenly he threw the paper to the ground and yelled, "All politicians are assholes."
The man sitting next to him in a finely pressed suit said, "I take offense at that!"
"Why?" the first man asked. "Are you a politician?"
"No, " he replied, "I am an asshole. "

My next door neighbour keeps saying he's actually a big cat in a human suit.

To be honest I think he might be lion.

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A well-renown, high-powered lawyer was just in a horrific car accident.

He was side-swiped, ripping the driver's side door completely off.

A police officer, who happened to be there, ran straight to the man. He found the him sitting on the ground against the wreck angrily swearing and yelling.

Officer: (Relieved the man is well enough to be yelling): "You...

A bearded jolly-looking fat white man in a red suit and with bandaged stumps where his hands used to be walks into a bar and orders a beer with a straw.

"Who are you supposed to be?" the bartender asks. "Well I just lost both my hands in a freak sleigh accident last night," the man replies. "So I guess just call me Canta Plaus."

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Man has suffered severe headaches since his teenage years.

Man has suffered severe headaches since his teenage years. He is now in his 30s still suffering terrible headaches. Doctors have run every test known, tried every medicine but still the headaches continue.

Eventually the man finds himself another doctor who after a thorough examination tells ...

Who wears a red suit and knows if you were naughty or nice?

The Spanish Inquisition.

My girlfriend was picking a bra to buy when I said "Bras dont suit you, your too flat"

My girlfiend then said "Well, you wear briefs right?"

How do you fix a fur suit?

With gluwu

Piece of British humour for you.

A woman goes to the funeral home to visit her late husband whose funeral is the next day.

Upon seeing the body, she says to the funeral director, “Oh, no, you've dressed him in a blue suit! He hated blue and I've given all his other suits to charity!”

The funeral director says, “I'm no...

Job application...

This is an actual job application someone submitted at a McDonald's fast food establishment.
Not sure if they hired him....


NAME - Greg Bulmash


DESIRED POSITION - Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be a...

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A hapilly married couple

So there's a couple who's hapilly married for 5 years now but recently nothing's been going on in the bed and the girl is worried that her man is either cheating on her or is planning to divorce her until one day he comes home and says.
-Get undressed and go to the bedroom
The girl, confused b...

Happy December 32nd!

Trump just filed a suit to officially make December four years long.

When should you buy a suit

When it suits you

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Stan and Dave, two avid golfers were on the 7th hole one day

And a large funeral procession passed by on the nearby road.
Stan interrupted his putting, respectively took of his hat and lowered his head as the hearse and mourners cars passed.
Dave very surprised at this, followed suit, admiring his friend's actions.
When it had passed, Dave said "Stan...

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A man stops 2 friends and I leaving a bar...

A man stopped 2 of my friends and I as we left a bar one night.

He ran up to us eagerly but quickly pulled a knife out and began threatening us.

He said “If you’re dick sizes don’t add up to 21 inches exactly, I’m going to kill you all right here”

Me, being the leader that I a...

A farmer walks into an lawyer’s office wanting to file for divorce

The attorney asks, “May I help you?” The farmer said, “Yeah, I want to get one of them thar dayvorces.”

The attorney said, “Well do you have any grounds?” The farmer said, “Yeah, I got me about 140 acres.”

The attorney says, “No, you don’t understand. Do you have a case?” The farmer sa...

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Three men are having a contest

The contest is to see who can keep their genital in a waffle iron for the longest. The first man turns the iron on, puts his penis in, pulls out after two seconds. The next man follows suit and lasts four seconds. The third lasted an entire five minutes and when asked about how he won he said “They ...

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A MAN went to the doctors suffering from a severe headache for years on end.

The doctor said, “Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is it will require castration. You have a rare condition which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicle...

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A man loses his penis in an industrial accident

Through the wonders of modern medicine, plastic surgeons are able to reconstruct his penis using tissue from an elephant’s trunk. After a full year of recovery and therapy, he’s finally cleared to use his new penis

So he takes his beautiful girlfriend out for a nice meal at a fancy restauran...

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A young newlywed couple finally makes it back to the honeymoon suite.

As they started to undress, the groom takes off his socks and the bride sees these huge gnarly growths on the groom's toes. She asks him what they were.
Groom says "When I was little I had a case of tolio." Bride says, "Don't you mean polio?". "Nope, tolio" he replied.

Then he takes off ...

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An elderly gentleman walks into an upscale cocktail lounge. He is in his mid-80s, well-dressed, hair well-groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel and smelling slightly of an expensive after shave. He presents a very nice image.

Seated at the bar is a classy looking lady in her mid-70s.

The sharp old gentleman walks over and sits alongside her. He orders a drink and takes a sip.

He slowly turns to the lady and says: "So, tell me; do I come here often?"

What do you call a snorkel that thinks it is a scuba suit?

Self
Proclaimed
Underwater
Breathing
Aparatus

I saw a clown with suit and case running into an allyway

I think there was some funny business going on there.

President's Aide: "Mr. Trump, the dry cleaners called and wanted to let you know...

You left two supreme court justices in your pocket when you dropped your suit off."

Where does Santa store his suit?

Is the Santa Clauset.

Some people say I don’t suit my haircut

But it grew on me

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer and a sandwich

The bartender says "wow, you don't see that every day! Man, what's your story?"

Th duck says "I'm a welder at the construction site across the street. I'll be here for a few months while we finish the building," and picks up his newspaper and starts reading. The bartender obviously wants to c...

Greek Philosopher Gets A Suit

A Greek Philosopher walks into a tailor's office and asks for 300 suits to be delivered to him.


The tailor offers some proposals: "I can send those in plastic bags, or I could even send those in parcels."


The Greek philosopher replies : "no, no, no I would like them to be deliv...

Racism in Formula 1

Every day they make Sergio Perez put on a nomex suit. Why is no-one complaining about this ?

Credit: A co-worker.

A boy is preparing his suit in a hotel room alone.

But he doesn’t know how to tie his bow tie. Unable to figure it out he asks the man at the room next door if he can. The man says, “Sure, just lay down on the bed.” The boy is hesitant but in a rush so he follows his instructions. The man hovers over him and quickly ties the bow tie. The boy sits up...

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When people dress in fully body suits of their favourite animals, a sexual kink isn't implied

It's infurred.

So this guy asks the girl of his dreams to be his date for the prom and she says “Yes.”

So the guy is very ecstatic and wants to make a great impression...

So he goes to the flower shop to buy a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a corsage but the line is very long and he has to wait over an hour to buy the flowers. But he wants to make a good impression so he waits and gets the f...

What happens when you go inside in a snow suit?

It melts.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two friends are sitting in a coffee shop.

One glances up and sees an Asian man sitting at a table nearby and says to his buddy, "I reckon that's a Japanese man over there. With his business suit and laptop."

"Hmmm, I think they're Chinese. His ponytail and long mustache gives it away." Replied his friend.

Luckily a third frien...

NASA was preparing for the Apollo project.

When NASA was preparing, some of the training of the astronauts took place on a Navajo reservation.

One day, a Navajo elder and his son were herding sheep and came across the space crew. The old man, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question that his son translated. "What are these guys in the ...

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