Im surprised that Roy Moore wants a recount; a large gap in numbers had never bothered him before.

Get it?



Edit: I'm not removing the "Get it?" Part.

Thicc Sauce is Andre Segers

Another Edit: thanks for making "Get It" a meme <3

Roy Moore refuses to concede the Alabama Senate race.

He keeps insisting that the black votes should only count for 3/5ths.

Why was Roy Moore waiting outside the liquor store when it opened?

He heard they had a 14 year old Brandy

An international conference was held to decide what the most annoying musical instrument was.

After intense debate, a shortlist of instruments was created, consisting of the bagpipes, didgeridoo, and vuvuzela, but before a vote was held it was decided that the exact origin of each instrument had to be accounted accounted for beyond any doubt.

The didgeridoo's origin was easily proven,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roy Moore says he’ll bring “Alabama values” to Washington, but I’m not so sure. I mean, he sexually assaulted teenage girls...

But he wasn’t related to any of ‘em!

You've heard Moore's law and Boyle's law but have you heard of Cole's law?

It's chopped cabbage. Thanks for the correction

Congress has finally made a decision and just announced that if Roy Moore wins the senate...

They will be ending their 'take your daughter to work' program.

What is Roy Moore's favorite piano key?

A minor

Moore doesn’t care that he lost tonight NSFW

word on the street is he prefers to come in a little behind.

I sure hope Roy Moore wins today

Alabama needs a congressman who isn't afraid to get his hands on the issues before they get too big.

Roy Moore is no longer interested in this year..

Because it’s officially ‘18

What's the difference between Roy Moore and an Anti-Vaxxer?

The Anti-vaxxer is against sticking it in kids

Sir Roger Moore, prominent James bond actor has passed away

His family say that they are shaken.... but not stirred

Roy Moore likes his women the same way he likes his constitutional amendments...

12 and Under

We already know Roy Moore's positions on crime and immigration. But, what about his position on children?

Missionary, mostly.

Doug Jones just won the Senate race against Roy Moore

I guess you could say he got Moore votes.

What does Roy Moore and an e-book have in common?

They're both pdf files.

Why is Roy Moore so mad about the election anyways?

He normally likes coming in a little behind.

Roy Moore is in bed with a girl, and says "pretend you're 14". She found that really weird...

Her birthday was in 4 months anyway.

Roy Moore missed the New Years Eve countdown.

He’s demanding a recount.

Roy Moore opened a clothing store in Birmingham, but it was quickly shut down.

Parents were pretty upset when they realized "Teen girls clothes always half off" was the entry policy, not a sale.

Why was Roy Moore a bad music teacher?

All he knew how to do was finger a minor.

Hey, Roy Moore; what's the weather forecast?

Tonight, we'll be dipping into the teens.

In the Alabama senatorial race next week, Roy Moore is either going to win...

...or he's going to come in a little behind.

The real reason Roy Moore wanted to be in D.C.

He hasn't been banned from the National Mall

Why did Roy Moore lose the election?

There’s a minimum age for voting

Trump endorsed Roy Moore but not Don Blankenship...

I guess it's all right to mess with minors, but miners are off limits.

So Roy Moore and a little girl walking through a scary Forest

The little girl turns to him and says, "Geese mister I'm really scared!".

And he says " How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone!"

Did you see that Roy Moore had a high profile interview on Dateline NBC?

What was unfortunate for him is that it was with Chris Hansen, who started it by asking him to take a seat over there.

What did President Trump call Roy Moore's senate loss?

*"A minor setback."*

So Sir Roger Moore has sadly died.

You could say he is in Double 0 Heaven now

I wanna ask Roy Moore voters how they feel about losing such a close race.

Unfortunately, I don’t speak Russian.

Turns out that Roy Moore is having a bad influence on weather in Alabama.

The temperatures are flirting with the teens this week.

I see that Gary Moore didn't get any upvotes.

He's Still Got the Blues.

Roy Moore still hasn't conceded, which actually makes sense.

How could anyone banned from mall food courts know anything about concessions?

Roy Moore is not happy with the events that transpired tonight

He liked it better when the night was young

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why can't Roy Moore live in a Northern state?

Because if the outside temperature drops into the teens he might try to fuck it

Tributes from around the globe are still pouring in after the death of Sir Roger Moore…

The one from Vladimir Putin read: "From Russia, with love."

Met Roy Moore at a bar once...

Chatted him up about wanting to hook up with twenty-nine year olds.

He looked at me with disbelief and asked "how are you going to do all twenty at once?"

[NSFW] Why did Roy Moore never miss a local Girl Scouts' meeting?

Because Brownies are delicious.

What's the difference between Bob Ross and Roy Moore?

One's a doodler and the other's a diddler.

Why does Roy Moore want a recount of the election?

He thinks Alabama is playing hard to get

Volvo pulls its ads from 'Hannity' after Moore coverage

Volvo owners begin smashing their cars in protest.

Why did Roy Moore go to Walmart?

He heard that girl's pants were half off.

Judge Roy Moore.

I sure as hell am.

What is the difference between Roy Moore and an Anti-vaxxer?

Anti-vaxxers don't like to stick 'em while they're young.

I don't understand all the uproar about Roy Moore lately.

It seems like a minor issue to me.

I heard Roy Moore fell off the wagon after losing on Tuesday...

Several sources claim he was heard repeatedly asking for a decent 15 year old Brandy.

What does Roy Moore and a guitarist have in common?

They both enjoy fingering minors.

I don't see why Roy Moore wants a recount.

Once the number goes past 16 he loses interest.

Roy Moore demanded a recount

The results came back that she was 14 and a half.

I was playing tennis with Roy Moore this morning... The score was love-15.

**AWKWARD!**

I heard Roy Moore was upset that his girlfriend didn’t vote for him...

But then he realized that 15 year olds can’t vote anyway.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roy Moore was sentenced to 14 months in prison.

The judge said he would've given him 14 years, but he was worried that Moore would ejaculate upon hearing the sentence.

Why is Roy Moore’s Strategic Planning Committee headquartered in Disney's Hollywood Hotel?

He likes to keep his staff in something 12 years old.

Why does Roy Moore like D.C.

Because, while the temperature is 30°, the real feel is in the teens.

What does Roy Moore call a high school track meet?

Speed dating

Why does Roy Moore always dress up like a cowboy?

Because he gets a little Woody around kids

What kind of spirits haunt an abandoned Benjamin Moore or Sherwin Williams?

Mineral spirits

What's the difference between 2015 and Moore's Law?

One's the year of the ram, the other is the ram of the year.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My chemistry teacher asked me a question in class.

She told to me to rank all the bonds.

So I did.

1) Connery

2) Craig

3) Brosnan

4) Dalton

5) Lazenby

She sent me outside the class. I still wonder if there were any Moore?

My wife told me I need to do more around the house...

Apparently, she wasn't talking about Mrs. Moore from across the street.

Sod's law: Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

Moore's law: The complexity of integrated circuits doubles every 24 months.

Campbell's law: The more any quantitative social indicator is used for social decision making, the more subject it will be to corruption pressures and the more apt it will be to distort and corrupt the social processe...

Dems haven't won a senate seat in Alabama since 1992

Unlike Roy Moore, they were capable of waiting 25 years.

Caesar: Veni, vidi, vici!

Roy Moore: Vidi, vici, veni.

The Alabama Senate elections are in! And even though it was tight,

Roy Moore came in a little behind.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I invented a new drink today; basically you start with a Shirley Temple and put a really old cocktail sausage in it.

I call it the "Judge Roy Moore".

Republicans: "We couldn't possibly lose Alabama!"

Roy Moore: "hold my beer kids"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a 14-year old girl and a Ferrari?

Roy Moore doesn't have a Ferrari in his basement.

How childish are Trump's tweets?

Let's just say Roy Moore would date them.

I'm not saying my cat is old..

.. but if it was a person, it would be too old for Roy Moore.

Doug Jones’ margin of victory is so small

Roy Moore is going to try and molest it.

Can you imagine going to your girlfriend’s prom at 32?

Well neither could Roy Moore. He preferred freshmen.

So it turns out the girl I've been talking to is only 14....

But its alright. I like her even Moore now.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.