The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum.

They're the Tolkien white guys.









Edit: Swigity Swoo, I got a silver from you?

Edit: Golly Gee, a gold for me?

Edit: Boo hoo, a baby snoo too?

Edit: Cowabunga Grift, I got a coin gift!

Edit: Beagle pup, here comes a bless up!

What has 15 actors, four settings, two writers, and one plot?

632 Hallmark movies.

I told my wife that Will Smith is the best actor/rapper of all time.

She said that’s Ludacris

Why do we tell actors "break A leg"?

Because every play has a cast

Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?

He was just going through a stage.

What does an actor sing in the shower?

Soap opera

Actor: to be or not to be?

######Me: [aggressively shaking beehive]...
sounds like more than two

The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum.

They're the Tolkien white guys.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An actor about to shoot a scene with a lion

He noticed the filming crew was in a cage, barely enough for them plus their equipments
The actor felt the need to inquire about the safety measures they had regarding the lion

"Before the scene, we make sure the lion mated, just to take the edge off." the lion tamer said.

"I'm not ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a bunch of porn actors on coke?

The lineup.

A bartender told me that the actor from No Country For Old Men started a fight in his pub

I asked, "Javier Bardem"?

He said "No, but I gave him a warning"

What do you call a firm, brittle, dry rodent that also happens to be an actor.

crisp rat

Where do actors that don't pay taxes perform?

in the audit-orium

The Kool-Aid man use to be a broadway actor

He had to turn to commercials after learning he had the inability to stop himself from breaking the fourth wall.

Does anyone know of any actors that can help cure my lisp?

I’m pretty sure Anne Hathaway, but I’m going to ask Colin Firth.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why was the porn actor fired?

He came too late at work.

The lead actor in a play has become very ill.

This is a case of lead poisoning.

Can anybody tell me what actor is playing Forrest Gump?

T.Hanks

Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger

are talking to each other about their long careers as action heroes. Sly says, "You did some okay comedy, but you have the governorship and political success to be proud of."

Arnold says, "You've had so much recognition in Hollywood. I've never been nominated for an Oscar, you have have been ...

The Faltering Actor

There was once an actor who did Shakespearean plays, but had aged and long past his peak! After many years, he finds himself in the Halifax Theater in Canada, where they are prepared to give him a chance.

The director says, “This is the most important part, and it has only one line. You walk...

You know which actor is best known for his headshot?

John Wilkes Booth

Teacher : Who's your favourite Actor?

Me: Arnold Schwarzenegger
Teacher: Spell it?!
Me: only joking its Jet Li

Robert Patrick, an actor best known for playing the T-1000, has left behind the Hollywood life to pursue his dream of owning a pest control business.

He is quoted as saying “I can’t wait to start my new life as an exterminator.”

How many actors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one. They hold on the bulb, and the world revolves around them.

So I added a famous person on xbox

A while back I added Paul Walker the actor famous for the fast an the furious franchise as a friend on my xbox an all he does is spend all of his time on the dashboard.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a porn actor with bad aim?

Mr. Completely

A Mexican actor died while performing stunts for a movie.

During the funeral, his mother walks towards the director and says,

"Jesus died for your scenes."

A young actor calls his agent from the set of his first film. He is playing the lead role for the first time in his career.

“How’s it going?” the agent asks.

“It’s amazing!” the actor gushes. “The director told me that my performance is making him consider making two films with me.”

“Two?” the agent replies.

“Yeah,” the actor says, “my first and my last.”

“The Irishman” stars Italian actors and I think I know why...

...the Irish actors were too hungover to make it to set on time.

Have you heard about the troupe of actors who supported themselves by making and selling camel milk cheese?

The called themselves the Drama Dairy.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the male incest porn actor get emotional and start crying on set?

Because he saw so much of himself in his daughter.

The Popes at the airport,

The popemobile broke down so he hails a taxi,

He demands the driver get him to the cathedral
in 10 minutes or less,

The driver says its impossible, the pope offers to drive,

The taxi driver considers the offer and eventually agrees and hops in the back seat,

The pope ...

What's the only natural thing that can be an actor?

The rock!

My wife insisted on a threesome with that Terminator actor

I didn’t want to risk trouble so as soon as he turned up I said “I’ll be front”

Two boll weevils grew up on a farm in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and, amazingly, became a famous actor...

The other stayed behind and never amounted to much.

I guess you could say he was the lesser of two weevils.

My actor friend got fired from his lead role in a play because of his cocaine addiction.

He kept blowing his lines.

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An actor gets his first big break...

"Hark, for yonder art thou cannon," the actor states. The part only had the one line.

The director looks excited. "Perfect!" he yells. "You have the job."

"Awesome, when do-" the actor starts before being interrupted by 2 large security guards. They pick him up by the arms and legs and...

I was once told I looked like an actor enough to be his stunt double.

The actor was Danny DeVito.

What do you get when you cross the world’s best actor with the Lorax

Keanu Leaves

What do you call an actor who hauls seafood?

Carrie Fisher.

Why did the actor ask for another line?

He was depressed and drugs were his only escape from reality

What do you call an occurence where an old actor forgets his lines?

Onset Dementia

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do you say "break a leg" to an actor ?

Cause without a good cast they are fucked

Which actor could have majored as an English professor?

Kelsey Grammer

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An actor, a businessman and a redneck

An actor, a businessman and a redneck are sitting in a bar on Christmas eve. The actor says, "I got my wife the perfect gift. A dress and a diamond necklace. That way if she doesn't like dress she has a diamond necklace."

The business man says, "I got my wife a new sweater and a ring. That wa...

Jussie Smollett paid two black actors to beat him up,

when Liam Neeson would have done it for nothing.

Dan is an aspiring actor who has recently been feelimg down.

He's done audition after countless audition, but has never managed to get a role. One day, as he's looking for another job, about to give up, he gets a call from his manager.

"Hello," Dan says.

"Hey," said Dan's agent, "I just managed to get you cast in a play. It's really last minute,...

Two actors are practicing their lines for a show.

The first guy says: "How could you do this to me? I hate you!" The second says: "You're making me so angry I swear I'm going to PUNCH you!" The first says "That line sounds cheesy. It makes it seem like a children's show. Let's talk to the writers about it." So they go the the writers and explain th...

I was once an actor in an action movie.

Me: "Stay back, or I'll kick you!"

Director: "Cut! You messed up, try it again. Aaaaand ACTION!"

Me: "Stay back, or I'll smack you!"

Director: "Cuuut! Come on, get it correct this time! Aaaand ACTION!"

Me: "Stay back, or I'll pinch you!"

Director: "CUT! That's it, ...

A struggling actor gets a call from his agent.

Agent: Do you want the good news or the bad news?

Actor: Give me the good news first.

Agent: I've found you a role in a production of *Hamlet*.

Actor: Well that's awesome! I've made it! How could there possibly be bad news?

Agent: You're the skull.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An out-of-work actor gets a call from his agent one day.

"I got you a job. It's a one-liner."

"That's okay!" replies the actor, "I've been out of work for so long I'll take anything. What's the line?"

"Hark, I hear the cannons roar," says the agent.

"I love it!" says the actor. "When's the audition?"

"Wednesday," says the agent...

Is there a more Dutch sounding actor than Tom Holland?

Yes, there's Tom Hollander.

Where do James Bond Actors go when they die?

00Heaven

Landlord: That Spanish actor out of Skyfall was kicking off in my pub the other night.

Customer: Javier Bardem?

Landlord: No, but he IS on his final warning.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman married four times: to a tycoon, an actor, a preacher, and an undertaker.

One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.

Some famous actors decide to make a movie about classical musicians

They immediately begin to claim roles.

Robert Downey, Jr. says “I’ll be Mozart.”

Nicolas Cage says “I’ll be Beethoven.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger says “I’ll be Bach!”

Actresses and actors who lose an Oscar all get the opportunity to act together.

Happy for the person who won.

Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?

Rigor Mortissen

Turns out the racist attack on the actor from empire was total bullsh**

I could smollett from a mile away.

Apparently a thespian friend of mine has a drug addiction...

I guess I misheard him we he said he was a "Meth Head" Actor

Who is CRISPR's favorite actor?

Gene Hackman

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An actor was playing the role of Macbeth

And he was delivering his soliloquy so poorly that the audience began to boo him loudly. Halfway through, the actor stopped and yelled "Give me a break! I'm just an actor, I didn't write this crap!"

Did you hear about the actor who only won an award because of the Italian mafia?

It turns out they really know how to rig a Tony.

David Hasselhoff walked into a bar

and ordered a drink.

“Its a pleasure to serve you, Mr Hasselhoff,” said the bartender.

“Just call me Hoff,” the actor replied.

“Sure,” the bartender said, “no hassle.”

Silent Actor

**Young Actor:** "Dad, guess what? I've just got my first part in a play. I play the part of a man who's been married for 30 years."

**Father:** "Well, keep at it, son. Maybe one day you'll get a speaking part."

Moishe the actor

Moishe, a Jewish actor, is so down and out, he's ready to take any acting gig that
he can find. Finally, he gets a lead, a classified ad that says, "Actor Needed To Play
An Ape." "I could do that," says Moishe.
To his surprise, the employer turns out to be the Central Park Zoo in New Yor...

I've been holding auditions for actors to play a new Fantastic Four team this afternoon...

... it's so stressful.

It's just been one Thing after another.

What do actors do when they make a mistake?

They react.

Actor Hugh Laurie was so fond of the works of Samuel Beckett that he once devoured an entire anthology of his poetry.

Hugh felt that he deserved to be a poet Laurie ate.

A washed up actor hasn't gotten a job in years...

... He has lost his ability to remember lines. But after looking for work for a very long time, finally he gets the lead role in a Broadway musical.

When he arrives at the theater the director tells him, "You have the most important part, but you only have one line. You walk onto stage with a...

I can't even picture my favorite actor going to jail now.

But if he does, he'll have to change his name to Morgan Man.

There are actors called Tom Holland and Tom Hollander

I can only deduce from this that there are also actors called Tom Holland With A Vengeance, Live Free or Tom Holland & A Good Day To Tom Holland.

Sir Roger Moore, prominent James bond actor has passed away

His family say that they are shaken.... but not stirred

Owen Wilson is an ok actor...

I personally like his brother more, even though he doesn't have that "wow" factor.

Did you hear where they're looking for the new James Bond actor?

In Daniel Craigslist

Which toad is a great actor?

Russell Croak

What do you call an actor preparing for a role as a drug addict?

A meth-head actor

What do an actor and a person with Alzheimer’s have in common?

They both act like it’s the first time they’ve had this conversation.

Two cannibals are eating an actor

One turns to the other and says "Tastes pretty overdone to me"

Sadly, the voice actor of Tony the Tiger has passed away

His last words: "I don't feel GRRRREAT!"

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