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Allegedly John Adams

In my many years, I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress

Sam Adams decides to pay Thomas Paine a visit ...

He knocks, and Tom comes to answer the door. Sam says, "I notice that you use the New York Times instead of a doormat. "Yes," says Tom. "These are the Times that dry mens' soles."

I misplaced my pizza cutter, so I used my Bryan Adams CD

It cuts like a knife
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