My little daughter came to me all excited, saying, “Daddy! Daddy! Guess how old I’ll be in June!”

“Oh I don’t know princess, why don’t you tell me?” I said. She gave me a huge smile and held up four fingers.

It’s now three hours later, police have joined in and she still won’t say where she got them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Irish Daughter...

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cursed her.
Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad.....

My Son, Luke, Loves How I Name My Kids After Star Wars Characters

My daughter, Chewbacca, not so much

My daughter want's the new iPhone for her birthday. I told her she will get one as long as she has good grades, does her chores, and follows the house rules. Otherwise she will get a cheaper phone, because.

It's my way or the Huawei.

My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed birthday party.

So I made her and all her friends clean the house.

A blonde is pregnant.

Brunette: Boy or girl?

Blonde: I want my first daughter to be a girl.

My 14-year-old daughter has finally met her online boyfriend in real life.

Must be true love, haven't seen her for weeks.

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There was a king with a beautiful virgin daughter

The king ruled a wealthy and massive kingdom, but he was obsessed with keeping his daughter a virgin. He had a device planted into her vagina that would chop off anything inserted into it.

He then called in his 3 best knights and told them that he would be off on a trip and that they would be...

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NSFW - A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughter's bedroom. When she opened the door she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator.

What are you doing?" she exclaimed.

The daughter replied, "I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband."

Later that week the father was in the kitchen and heard a humming sound coming from the basement.
When he went downstairs...

Two ants, a mother and her daughter, were walking through their underground city.

They were having a lovely day until they came upon a group of protesters outside the queen's domain. One man with a sign reading "It's time to GO!" spotted them and quickly approached.

"Excuse me ma'am, but do you have a moment to take a look at some alarming literature and help support our ...

The woman who injected her 8-year old daughter with Botox for beauty pageants has lost custody.

The child didn't look surprised.

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A farmers daughter wants to have a sleepover with three of her guy friends(NSFW)

The farmer agrees but when the friends get there he sits them down and tells them "ok I'll let you sleep at my house, but if you sleep with my daughter I will kill you" And he leaves them for the night.

The following morning he wakes up early to tend to his crops and finds them already awake...

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A man is lost in the woods and it is getting dark.

As he walks through the woods he comes across a small cabin. He goes up to the cabin and knocks on the door. An old Chinese man opens it. 

“I’m lost in the woods and I need somewhere to stay for the night,” the man said. “Can I please stay here?” 

“Sure,” said the Chinese man. “But as ...

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One day a father and a daughter were at a park.

The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, “Just because you killed the butterfly, you don’t get butter for a week.”
They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, “Nice try.”

My daughter woke me around 11:50 last night.

My wife and I had picked her up from her friend Sally's birthday party, brought her home, and put her to bed. My wife went into the bedroom to read while I fell asleep watching the Braves game.

"Daddy," she whispered, tugging my shirt sleeve. "Guess how old I'm going to be next month."
...

What’s a good name for a detective?

Mr. E

* My 9 year old daughter came up with this, so please be kind

Courtesy of my 7yo daughter: What do you get when you cross a cow and an octopus?

A call from the ethics department and the immediate revocation of your grant funding!

A farmer has three daughters that are all going on their first dates...

The farmer decides to greet the suitors at the door with his shot gun. Around 5 the first boy arrives and rings the doorbell. “My names Joe, I’m here for flo, we’re going to the show, is she ready to go?”

The farmer thought he was alright, so off they went to their date.

Shortly afte...

A farmer drove over to his neighbor’s house and knocked on the door...

A boy, about 9, opened the door.

“Is your mom or dad home?” The farmer asked the boy

“No, they went in to town.” The boy replied

“Well, how about your brother Howard?” The farmer asked

“No, he went with mom and dad.” The boy said

The farmer stood there for a minut...

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A mother was driving with her daughter. They get behind a truck and all of a sudden...

A giant dildo hits their windshield. The daughter says “What was that, Mommy?!”
Mom says, “It was just a bug, honey.”
Daughter says, “Well, that bug has the biggest dick I’ve ever seen!”

I hate when my daughter tells that she feels embarassed when I show up in her workplace and check on her

But this is the only strip club in the town ..

I asked my amputee daughter if she could guess what we were having for dinner tonight.

She replied with "I don't know dad I'm stumped"

A middle aged guy and his teenage daughter were riding a motor bike

and taking a shortcut through a darkened park when they were stopped by a gang of muggers. They searched them and took the guys wallet, his watch and the motorbike but couldn’t find any jewelry from the girl.When the muggers had gone, the guy asked his daughter; “Did they take your new diamond ring ...

A woman is walking home with her three daughters.

Rose asks her mother, “Mom, why did you name me Rose?”

To which her mother replies, “Well sweetie, when we where coming home from the hospital with you a rose fell on your head!”

Lily, curious now, asks her mother, “Mom, why did you name me after a flower too?”

To which her mot...

My uncle told me I'm the favorite daughter of his brother

which is niece

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Girlfriend's Dad: You took my daughter's virginity. What do you have to say for yourself?

Me: Sorry, it won't happen again.

My daughter entered a toddler's beauty pageant in the south.

She won the Miss Sippy Cup!

What do lawyers name there first daughter?

Sue

What did the drummer name his twin daughters?

Anna 1
Anna 2.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man sees his daughter playing in her garden

He walks up to her and asks “how are you honey”

She replies “daddy what is that called”, pointing at two spiders cradling each other

Dad: well that’s a daddy long leg

Daughter: and is the other one a mommy long leg?

The dad chuckling at her innocences: no honey, both of...

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While reading an article about fathers and sons drinking together, I remembered the time I took my daughter out for her first drink.

Off we went to our local bar only two blocks from the house.
I got her a Guinness. She didn't like it, so I drank it.
Then I got her a Killian's she didn't like that either, so I drank it.
Finally, I thought she might like some Harp Lager? She didn't. I drank it.

I thought maybe she'...

My daughter called me at work and told me she was playing a new game...

Its called hold ur breath challenge, i smiled until she told me grandpa has a new record of 4hrs.

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My daughter was red-faced with embarassment when I caught her having sex with her boyfriend..

"Why are you hiding in the closet dad ? Is that a camcorder in your hand ? " Was all she could say ...

My 9-yr old daughter just told me this one.

What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked out the window?

It looks like rain, dear.

Father and his special daughter are driving back to her mom's.

Father drives past a sign "7/11"
Daughter yells with excitement "Hotdog! Ice-creams"
Father says " ok we can get a hotdog"
He stops at the 7/11 walks in with the daughter and she yells to the clerk " Toilet ! Hotdog ice cream!" They clerk quickly hands her the bathroom key as the father che...

Who Did Princess Leia's Hair? (My daughter's joke)

Darth Braider



(I know, I know. She's a kid though. Lol)

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A brunette mom, a redhead mom, and a blonde mom were talking about their daughters.

The brunette mom says, "The other day, I was cleaning my daughter's room, and I found a bottle of vodka. I didn't even know she drank!"

"Well, the other day I was cleaning my daughter's room," says the redhead mom, "and I found a pack of cigarettes. I didn't even know she smoked!"

"T...

When I refused to buy her concert tickets for the weekend, my 15 year old daughter broke down and threatened to cry a river.

I told her to go ahead, but remember that she's so self absorbed the tears won't even make it to her cheeks.

My daughter's favourite

What wobbles in the sky?

A jellycopter.

This was her first and favourite joke when she heard it in kindergarten.

Psychic Daughter

Bill is putting his young daughter to bed one night and as he walks out the bedroom door he hears her saying her prayers. She says, "God bless mommy, daddy, and grandma, rest in peace grandpa."

Bill rushes back into her bedroom and asks her, "Why did you say the last part?" His daughter repli...

My teenage daughter is really acting odd..

She can’t even

Daughter

I asked my five year old daughter what she wanted for her birthday.

"I want unicorns, rainbows and fairies," she giggled.

Ok, LSD it is then.

A man had 2 daughters and a son. One day all three of them wanted to ask how Dad had named them.

The first daughter asked, "Daddy why did you name me Rose?"

The father responded, "When you were born, a rose pedal floated through the window and landed on your head."

The second daughter asked, "Daddy, why did you name me Violet?"

The father responded, "When you were born, the...

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An Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day, when the daughter said, "My hands are freezing cold!" The mother replied, "Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up."

The daughter did and her hands warmed up.

The next day, the daughter was riding with her boy friend who said, "My hands are freezing cold!"

The girl replied, "Put them between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm them up."

He did and warmed his hands.

The following da...

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A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom, I have someone for you to meet!"

Well, it was an immediate hit.

They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Spain.

Their first night there, she undressed as he did.

There she stood nude, except for a pair of black panties, he in his birthday suit.

Lo...

Daughter’s favourite knock knock joke

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Interrupting paleontologist

Interrupting paleon...

DINOSAUR! DINOSAUR! DINOSAUR!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My daughter saw my wife and I having sex this morning

She said "Quit sending me these videos!"

There's this dad who is trying to get his daughter a birthday gift

And he knows that she is really starting to like Barbie, so he goes to the mall in hopes of finding a Barbie doll. He finally finds a store that sells Barbies and asks the cashier what Barbies are available.

"Well we have four Barbies: the Regular Barbie, which is $5."

The dad doesn't ...

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A daughter asked...

A daughter asked her mother “Mom, how do you spell scrotum?”

Her mom replied “Honey you should’ve asked me last night, it was on the tip of my tongue.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A son, mother and daughter are on a nudist beach

A little ways away they see two people having sex. ‘What are they doing?’ the son asks. The dad tells him they’re making cakes. The family decides to go to the zoo instead, where they see two monkeys having sex. ‘What are they doing?’ the son asks. The dad tells him they’re making cakes. They go to ...

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A dad and his 8 year old little girl are driving in a truck...

In front of them is a car driving along with a husband and wife who are arguing profusely. Out of nowhere, the wife leans over, cuts off her husband's penis and tosses it out the window.

It goes flying back and hits the truck windshield and flies off. The little girl goes, "Daddy what was th...

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A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother a question

"Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?" said her daughter. "Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter. ...

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At a Sunday family lunch, a daughter, good student aged 20, announces that she is pregnant.

Father drops the fork and knife in shock. Mother looks at her in total disbelief. None of them are able to say a word for couple of seconds, before yelling starts... What was she thinking about? Of course she does not plan to keep it? They invested so much in her education, how could she do this? Wh...

The 3 step Chinese torture

A guy comes to a Chinese house in the middle of nowhere. Being late he ask to sleep in their house. The dad accepts but says: "If you sleep with my daughter I will use the 3 step Chinese torture on you!"

The guy accepts and enters the house. The daughter is stunning beautiful. Also she flirts...

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A couple decide to take their young daughter to zoo one weekend

While standing around the elephant exhibit the little girl notice that the big bull elephant has huge erection

She whisper to her mother "What is that between his legs?" & her mother whisper back "Oh that is nothing darling."

Not satisfied with mothers answer she whisper to her fat...

My future son in law just recently proposed to my daughter.

She was very excited, and called me the morning after. She asked me to come over, and I did.

When I got there, I told them congratulations! Hewas a good man, albeit a bit weird at times. I was very excited for the both of them, until my daughter pulled me into the other room and showed me her...

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A pregnant woman walks into a bank being robbed,

She tried to call the cops and got shot in the stomach three times. Luckily, all her children were safe.

15 years later, one of her daughters came up to her and said, "Mom, I was peeing and a bullet came out." So, she told her daughter the story.

Then, her other daughter walked into th...

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A mother takes her daughter to a clinic

She tells the doctor that her daughter has been having terrible nausea in the morning, lost her appetite, and even missed a period.

The doctor examines her, orders a bloodwork, and tells them to come back later in the evening.

The mom and girl come back. The doctor announces that the g...

Courtesy of my 6yo daughter: What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth?

A Flossiraptor

[True story] A coworker never heard of the burger restaurant “Five Guys”

And his daughter told him “I had five guys last night and I’m not feeling well now.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A dad scolded his daughter for killing a butterfly

To punish her, he told her she couldn't have any butter for a week.

The next day his daughter killed a honeybee.

To punish her, he told her she couldn't have any honey for a week.

The next day the daughter comes to her dad and says, "Mom killed a cockroach. Should I tell her?"

My daughter said she wanted to be independent

So I shrunk her down and put her in my locket

I recently won the hand of the daughter of the local butcher.

I stil can't believe some of these cannibal auctions on the Dark Web.

The most annoying part about both my wife and daughter wearing burqa is the confusion.

Last night, I accidentally slept with my wife

My daughter asked me if she could lick the bowl.

I told her she had to flush like everyone else.

I wanted to write a movie script about a retired CIA agent who has to rely on his old skills to save his kidnapped daughter, but that idea was taken.

So I thought instead I'd write a script about a retired CIA operative who is taken hostage along with his wife in Instanbul, but that idea was taken, too.

A man walks into a store to buy a Barbie doll for his daughter. "How much is that Barbie in the window?" he asks the shop assistant.

In a manner, she responds, "Which Barbie? We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95 and Divorced Barbie for $395.00."

The guy asks, "Why is Divorced ...

I accidentally walked into my daughter’s room and was shocked to see her reenacting a fantasy scene from 50 Shades of Grey.

Like the one where she gets a decent job right out of college.

What do women astronauts and my 14 year old daughter have in common?

"I have nothing to wear!"

My daughter got in a fight with some girl who called her a whale.



“Come on love,” I said, “You’re bigger than that.”

My wife thought I would never give our daughter a silly name.

So I decided to call her Bluff.

My daughter wants a new iPhone so to teach her a lesson...

I told her that she can have one if she washes the dishes, sweeps the floor, takes out the trash, does the laundry, mows the lawn, walks the dog, dusts the shelves and helps me cook every day.

The lesson?

iPhones come form child labour.

I asked my daughter if she'd seen my newspaper.

She told me that newspapers are old school. She said that people use tablets nowadays and handed me her iPad.



That fly didn’t stand a chance.

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A daughter calls her mother and says "I'm divorcing Nathan. All he wants is sex, sex and more sex."

My vagina is now the size of a 50-cent piece. when it used to be the size of a 5-cent piece.

Her mother says:

"You are married to a multi-millionaire. You live in a mansion. You drive a Ferrari. You get all the money. You take 6 vacations a year and you want to throw all that away for ...

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A man goes to the doctor and says he wants an STD test for his daughter.

“But she’s only ten” says the doctor, “is she sexually active?”

“Not really, she mostly just lies there” he replies.

A father in Iraq gifted his daughter a new bag. The daughter replied.....

Thanks for the Baghdad

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A big rubber dildo hits the windshield of the family car

Daughter in the back says: "what was that?"

Mother answers: "nothing sweetheart.... Just a big fat bug"

Daughter replies: "it had a huge dick though!"

Never date a moonshiners daughter...

She only wants to make you liquor

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A farmer has three daughters...

A farmer has three daughters and they all have dates on the same Saturday night. The daughters are upstairs getting ready and there’s a knock on the door.

The farmer answers the door to a nice looking young man who say:

“Hi, my names Joe I’m here to pick up Flo, we’re going to see a s...

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Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. So to teach her a lesson I said, "Just for that you don't get any butter for a month."

Today in the kitchen she killed a cockroach. I said, "Nice try."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How does a Mom from Alabama know her daughter has started menstruating?

When her son's dick tastes like blood.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old joke I heard from a friend of mine..

Once there was a millionaire who had a collection of live alligators. He kept them in a pool at the back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single.

One day, he decides to throw a huge party. During the party he announces, "My dear guests, I have a proposit...

An eight year old girl went with her father to the office on take your daughter to work day..

As they were walking around the office, the young girl started crying and getting very cranky.

Her father asked, ''what's wrong sweetie?''

As his colleagues gathered around, she sobbed loudly: ''Daddy, where are all the clowns you sad you worked with?''

My 17-year-old daughter and I made up a joke today! Q: Who is the bread God’s arch-enemy?

A: The Anticrust!

Spanglish joke (OC by my daughter)

What did the road say to the other road? Why you so high wey?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There's an old farmer with 3 beautiful daughters. He is very protective of them and meets every potential suitor at the front door, with a loaded shotgun in his hands.

Sure enough, come Saturday evening there's a knock at the door. The farmer jumps up, throws open the door and points his shotgun at the young man.

The fellow is a little startled, but manages to say "Hi, my name is Joe. I'm here for Flo. I'm here to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?"...

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An 18 year old girl tells her mom that she has missed her period for two months

Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Fer...

I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday.

I can't wait to see her face light up when she opens it.

My grandson

Edit: please go easy on this joke - my 15 year old daughter made it.

What is the difference between a Porsche and my friends daughter?

I’ve never been in my friends daughter.

What do you call a juice box’s daughter who’s transitioned to a male?

CapriSon.

My wife wants to leave me. She says I care more about gambling than I do her or our daughter.

She’s obviously wrong. Why else am I refusing to leave the casino until I win my daughter’s college tuition money back?

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A father watched his young daughter as she played in the garden. Tears formed in his eyes as he thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes.

Suddenly she stopped and stared at the ground. The father went over to her to see what had captured her attention.

He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating.

"Daddy, what are those spiders doing?" she asked. "They’re mating," her father replied. "What do you call the spider on t...

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A farmer has three daughters...

Who all have dates on the same night. Considering how protective the farmer is as a father, he sat and waited for the boys with a shotgun in hand.

The first boy showed up: “I’m Eddy, lookin’ for Betty. We plan on spaghetti from Teddy’s, is she ready?”

The farmer took a good look at the...

A mother called the doctor about her teenage daughter. "She refuses to eat anything but yeast and car wax. Now she's lying in bed asleep and I can't wake her. What should I do?" "There's nothing to worry about." said the doctor,

"she'll rise and shine soon enough..."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is lost in the woods, but finds a cabin next to a small ravine

He knocks on the door and an old Chinese man answers. He asks if he could possibly stay the night, and the Chinese man says he can "But..." he warns "My daughter is very beautiful, and if you lay a finger on her I will inflict upon you the worst three tortures China has ever produced."

The ma...

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A paralyzed man says to his friend, “Go upstairs and get my shoes. My feet are cold”

The friend goes upstairs and sees the paralyzed man’s two sexy 17 year old daughters.

He says, “Your father sent me up here to have sex with you.”

One of the girls replies, “That couldn’t possibly be true!”

The man says “I’ll prove it” and then yells towards the stairs, “Both of...

My daughter lost her first tooth today

I bet she won't touch my X- box again !

[NSFW] What's the difference between this morning and my bosses daughter?

I'm not coming in this morning.

A blonde mom is cooking dinner when her blonde daughter walks in.

The daughter asks, "Mom, why do people think we blondes are stupid?"

Her mother replies, "I'll show you", and taps hard on the kitchen counter.

Somewhat confused, the blonde daughter says, "Someone's at the door!".

The blonde mother laughs. "This is why people think we're stupid...

My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday. The guy said the rental was $50 and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars. I said, “That’s outrageous!”

He just shrugged and said, “That’s inflation for you.”

My husband and daughter start using French bread as swords

I say, “You shouldn’t do that! Violence baguettes violence.”

A couple had their first daughter and were deciding on a name.

The man decides he wants to call her Hope. The woman says “I like Love, let’s call her that!” They come to the resolution to name her Love, since that’s what the wife wanted so badly. Times goes by and baby Love is born a happy baby. Love continued to be a happy baby all through elementary school. H...

I asked my daughter for a newspaper.

She laughed and said "You dont need a newspaper to read news. Here is my phone!"

So I used her phone to kill a spider on the wall.

Doctor to Mrs. Spew: “Is your daughter always stuttering like that?”

Mrs. Spew shakes her head: “No, only when she wants to say something.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If only my daughter could see this

I wouldn’t have to pay for her fucking eye surgery

I love taking my blind daughter out for a drive.

Every time I hit a speed bump, I tell her it was a dog.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My 9 year old daughter is starting to ask me some really embarrassing questions about sex that I dont want to answer

I mean, just yesterday she asked me “is that the best you can do?”

My 5 y/old daughter told me no more Dad Jokes.

I told her that the only Dad Joke around here is You.

Daughter: "Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion?"

Father: "Ask your sister.”

Daughter: "I don't have a si-"

Today my 10 year old daughter referred to the pile of dirty laundry that my wife is doing as.

Mount Wash More.

A farmer was working out in the field with his three daughters one day when he saw a car approach

A strapping young man stepped out of the car and approached the farmer confidently.

'Hello sir. My name's Dean, and I'm here to take Jean to the dairy Queen'

The farmer respects the lads courteous approach and says, 'Alright Jean off you go, you kids enjoy yourselves'. Not five minutes...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three guys want to date a farmers daughter

There’s a black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican guy. When they confront the farmer and he says

“Okay I’ll tell you what. You three go out and pick 100 things from my farm. If you can shove all 100 up your ass you can date my daughter. If you can’t I’ll shoot ya.”

They all accept and th...

A rich mother in law has 3 daughters who are married off to 3 men....

She wanted to test whether her sons in law really cared about her or not. So she devised a plan. She invites her first SIL for a run and after reaching a river she purposefully slips into the river's current.
Without any hesitation first SIL jumps into the river and saves her. The very next day h...

The Godfather’s relaxing at his social club...

...with his crew. The usual gaggle of young Turks waits in the wings, hoping to get noticed, hoping to move up.

The Godfather calls one of them over.

“Jimmy, I hear good things about you. They tell me you’re serious, that you can be trusted.”

Jimmy swells with pride.

“I ...

My son was just born and another dad at the nursery congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday. He said; maybe they’ll marry each other.

Sure, like my son is going to marry someone twice his age...

A potato had 3 daughters

When they were all grown up, the first one came to her father and said “daddy, daddy, I’m going to get married!”

Father potato asked to whom?

“To an Idaho potato!” Said the first daughter potato.

Father potato said “Idaho potatoes are very hearty and good lineage. He will be a g...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the redneck say when he walked in on his daughter using a cucumber to masturbate?

Hey! I was going to eat that later! Now it's going to taste like cucumber.

My daughter identifies as a small group of words standing together as a conceptual unit, typically forming a component of a clause.

Should I be worried or is it just a phrase?

What can Donald Trump and I both agree on?

That if Ivanka wasn't Trump's daughter, I would date her.

My daughter wants a pony for Christmas

I think a traditional turkey would taste better but it's her choice.

I told my daughter to be sensible before her eighteenth birthday party.

She said, "You are only eighteen once!"


I said, "No...you're eighteen 365 times, unless it's a leap year."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The daughter walks up to her dad and asks to borrow his car. (NSFW)

Girl: “Hey dad. Can I borrow your car?”
Dad: “You can borrow it if you dropped to your knees and suck my dick.”
Girl: “Ew! You’re my father, I’m not gonna suck your dick!”

Few minutes go by and she considers her dad’s request as she really needs to borrow the car.

Girl: “Fine da...

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