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Tv Dinner Jokes

Doctor's phone rings.

Dad: Doctor!, Doctor!

We were watching soccer with a TV dinner.

I guess I wasn't looking, I nicked my son's wrist.

There's blood everywhere, I, I can't stop the bleeding,

.. wait, oh it's a mess..

Doctor: Don't panic, my nurse has called an ambulance.

What's...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy finishes shopping at the supermarket and goes to the register.

As he checks out, the girl takes notice of the items he is buying: cat food, a TV dinner for one, and a bottle of cheap wine.

The girl asks the man, "I bet you're single, aren't you?"

The man, sensing a possible flirt, asks, "Why yes I am, how could you tell?"

The girl looks him...

Before I got married I was in a store paying for groceries.

I had a quart of milk, a half dozen eggs and a TV dinner. The cashier looks at me with a smile and says “You MUST be single!”
I said “Why do you say that?”
And she said “Because your so fu$king ugly!”

What does Hannibal Lecter call the girl from The Ring?

a TV dinner

A woman is going through the checkout line the night before Valentine's day

A woman is going through the checkout line the night before Valentine's day. She is placing her items on the belt: a TV dinner, a soap opera digest, 3 bottles of wine, and 3 chocolate bars.

The clerk looks and her and says "I hate Valentines Day...what about you, you must be single right?"...

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