Monopoly is fun but it has some really old stuff that isn’t valid anymore.

There’s free parking, a luxury tax and rich people can actually go to jail.

Fun fact: You can’t breathe correctly while smiling

Just kidding, I made you smile :)

I had to apologize to my friend for making fun of his erectile dysfunction.

I said, “Hope there are no hard feelings.”

I have an imaginary friend, but he keeps making fun of me.

He keeps saying, “At least I have a real friend.”

I was driving my son to pre-school and he was having fun making dinosaur sounds.

"ROAR!" he yelled.

"What dinosaur is that?" I asked.

"T Rex!"

Then he said, "HONK!"

"What dinosaur is that?" I asked with a chuckle.

"Triceratops," he said.

"Why does a Triceratops honk?"

And he said, "Because it has horns!"

Janelle’s a fun name...

Starts with a J, ends with anelle.

What's more fun than a vegan at a BBQ?

Anything. Literally anything.

Bill’s had a tough week, so he decides to have a little fun

It was Friday evening, it had been payday and Bill had really had a tough week.

So on leaving the office, he decided that instead of going home, he would stay out for the entire weekend partying with his buddies and in the process blow his entire weeks salary.

When he finally arrived h...

One minute you're young and fun...

The next minute you're turning down the stereo in the car so you can see better.

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Fun facts about England

Fun fact: Sussex, Wessex, Essex, and Middlesex, are all named for points on a compass, South, West, East, and Middle respectively, and represent places of Saxon occupancy. That is, Wessex means West Saxons.

But why Middle and not North, you ask. Well, Little Timmy, there's no north because no...

Fun fact: Having friends gives you memory loss.

I read this in a textbook on page 53 at 4:37 PM on Friday May 12, 2006

Kids these days don't know what good clean fun is!

Frankly, I don't know what good it is either!

fun fact

a group of little girls is called a giggle.


a group of little boys is called trouble.

A group of physicists held a beach party. They had fun so made it an annual event.

It's becoming a really popular wave function.

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LEGO bricks are like boobs...

...They're designed for kids, but it's the grown-ups who have more fun with them. Oh, and it hurts when someone steps on them.

Fun fact: the first french fries weren’t made in France

They were made in Greece

a caring mother makes her son loafs of bread shaped like batman, to make his sandwiches fun every time. guess what happens when it's in the oven?

the dark knight rises.

Time files when you're having fun

Meanwhile one frog to another, "Times fun when you're having flies"

A few years ago I had a proud (step)dad moment I think this sub will like..

This was right after picking her up from preschool. She was usually a bit grumpy and I always tried to be fun and keep the drive home more upbeat.

 

Her: "I'm hungry."

Me: "Nice to meet you, hungry, I'm dad."

Her: "Ahhhhgh could you not say that anymore?"

...

It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

Or a subreddit costs you $70 billion.

What do polish people do for fun?

Polish stuff

FUN FACT: If you sneeze and fart at the same time...

Your body takes a screenshot.

A snail saw a slug looking sad whilst watching a couple of beetles scurrying about having fun.

"What's up mate, life in the slow lane getting you down?", asked the snail.

The slug just looked at him and replied, "No. Surely it's obvious why I'm so down? I've had my home repossessed!"

Did you hear about the snake that killed animals for fun?

He was a cold blooded murderer

Don't make fun of obesity

It's too big of a matter to be taken lightly.

Fun fact : Australia's biggest export is boomerangs.

It's also their biggest import.

Before you make fun of someone walk a mile in their shoes...

That way you are a mile away, and you have their shoes.

Lot's of people tell me I "must be fun at parties"

How would they even know? I never get invited to them.

Old Age Fun

Told to me by my 80 year old mother. Elizabeth and Gladys were stuck in an older folks home and bored to tears. So they decided to have a little fun and excitement. They go into the closet and strip naked. Then they run through the card room were two old fellas are playing cards. Tom saids to ...

Hey, I'm new to this Sub, and think I'm going to have a lot of fun here!

said the lettuce leaf foolishly. He was yet to come to terms that he, and eveyone else in this Sub, are going to be eaten.

People make fun of my nose sometimes,

But if God gave me my choice of all the noses on earth, I would pick my nose before I picked anyone else’s.

i always thought it'd be fun to be a Hare Krishna

it's so unfortunate I never got the chants

Fun Facts about ants

So as you may or may not know, ants have many breeds, but above these breeds, two general groups can be seen in ants around the world. These groups are the Macro ants (Big ants), and the Micro ants (Small ants).

Multiple different breeds of ants can be found in each of the two groups (Such ...

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Everybody was making fun of my friend at a party

Everyone was making fun of my friend at a party I went to over the holidays. They all kept going into graphic detail about how they saw him fucking a dead dog by the railroads the other night. I mean they were really laying into this guy, and you could tell that he was starting to get really embarra...

What do female reindeers do for fun?

Go into town to blow a couple of bucks

Americans, Before You Make Fun of Kids This Christmas for Believeing in Santa,

Remember, Almost 70 Millions of You Believed in Trump.

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Fun fact:

69% of men find a sexual meaning in every joke

There once was a blonde woman who was tired of everyone making fun of her for being a “dumb blonde”.

There once was a blonde woman who was tired of everyone making fun of her for being a “dumb blonde”.

Having enough with the stereotype, she went to the hairdresser and had her hair dyed brunette.

On her way home, she was driving past a field full of sheep.

She got excited and s...

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I asked my wife to dress up as my favourite Star Wars character for some sexy birthday fun

I walked into the bedroom that night and I was shocked,

"Babes, **Jabba the Hutt** is not my favourite Star Wars character" I exclaimed,

"Fuck you asshole" She shouted "I haven't got dressed yet"

Recently became a dad and now these are popping in my head: What is it called when you are made fun of in a dream?

Sleep Deprecation

People always say we Germans don't have fun

Well, obviously we don't. Whenever we try to have some fun someone comes around and helps France!

A mushroom walks into a bar, puts down a $5 bill, says "Gimme a drink!"

Bartender says "Get outta here, we don't serve your kind!"
Mushroom says "Why not? I'm a fun guy!"

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Oh wow you’re gonna make fun of me for never eating pussy?

Rub it in my face why don’t ya?

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a restaurant.

They are having a fun time and give their waitress a huge tip. Super excited about the tip, the waitress decides to tell them a secret: In the women's bathroom, there is a magical mirror. If you tell it something truthful, you will be greatly rewarded. However, if you lie to the mirror, you will dis...

What is even sadder than a funeral?

An eral. It is like a funeral but with no fun.

You shouldn’t make fun of pets with artificial limbs.

It’s a faux paw

Why did Tinkerbell get made fun of at school?

She Peter Pants

We learned about oxymorons.

It was very fun, there were many examples.


freezer burn, original copy, exact estimate, truthful politician, caring insurance, Microsoft Works, and more!

Fun fact:

If all the veins in your body were to be laid out in a single, straight line

YOU WOULD DIE.

A girl invites her best friend to her Birthday party

At her birthday party while everyone else is away and having fun her best friend eats her whole cake. They catch her and of course the birthday girl is upset, but she manages to calm down and act like everything is fine, deciding to get her revenge another time.

Then several months later it's...

Beer

After Great Britain's Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided it would be fun to hit a pub in London and go out for a beer.

The first sits down and says, "Hey, Señor, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona."

The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it...

Wanna hear a fun fact about the Titanic?

The pool is still full.

Why is it called a kilt?

Because that's what they did to the last guy that made fun of them.

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When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend with big tits.

When I was 16, I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there was no passion, so I
decided I needed a passionate girl with zest for life.
In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was
an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suici...

Intercoursing with a motivator is a whole lot new fun.

She will keep you coming.

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What do you call a boner at a funeral?

Mourning wood.

Sorry this is long, a husband and wife are on a golf course

The wife swings and it cracks to the right nailing a house and smashing a window. Being responsible adults they went to apologize and pay for damage. Upon knocking on the front door, the door opens wide up to a man with his arms crossed above a broken bottle. The man explains he’s a genie and has be...

I was gonna make an antimasker joke.

But my parents taught me to not make fun of the mentally disabled.

Why did the fun guy tell everyone to get away from him?

Because they weren't leaving him mushroom to move around.

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My wife asked me, "Is having a penis fun?"

I said, "It has it's ups and downs."

Mormons be like, “you know what’d be fun?”

Doesn’t matter.

Fun fact about sign language

It is the least spoken language on Earth

Its fun hanging with your friends in the public.

Especially when you’re all depressed.

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3 men get drunk at a bar...

The first guy goes: "You know what? My arm is really small, like, really really small. I reckon it's legitimately the smallest arm in the world"

The second guy goes: "Come to think of it, my head is tiny, I think I have the smallest head in the world"

Third guy goes: "I've never told...

It wasn't much fun last year having a broken neck.

But I can look back now and laugh.

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Two women decides to go out and have some fun without their husbands.

The night turned out great it was a lot of fun. They got tipsy so they headed back home, but on the road they had a sudden urge to pee, so they climbed over the wall of a graveyard nearby. When finnished, they recocgnised they’ve got nothing to wipe themself clean with. One of them used her panties ...

People say "Time flies when you're having fun."

Nobody's had any fun this year, and it's already October.

What did the hombre say when they made fun of his pants?

Leave my pantalones!

Two men from Texas were in Canada for winter break.

At their cabin they met two canadians. The day after they decided they had to get food, so naturaly they decided to go ice fishing. To make it a bit more fun, the two guys from Texas decided to show the canadians how great America was, by beating them in an ice fishing competition. The canadians acc...

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A programmer and an engineer

A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a very long flight from LA to NY. The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks....

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Tits and LEGO Sets have a thing in common

It's meant for the kid but the dad ends up having the most fun with it.

There's a boy named Bonnie...

There’s a boy named Bonnie.

He is made fun of throughout high school because of his weird name, and so he is become very shy.

But he has a crush on a girl and works up the courage to ask her out.

She says yes, and he is so happy.


After years of dating, he works up ...

I ran out of toilet paper

and started using lettuce leaves. Today was just the tip of the iceberg, tomorrow romaines to be seen.

Fun Fact, in the country I was born we really used leaves as toilet paper

It's no fun being an archaeologist.

Everybody you try to date is long dead.

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Besides humans dolphins are one of very few species that have sex for fun..

But damn, I still don't like that weird silence in the car every morning I take them back to the zoo.

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I hate people who make fun of Uranus by calling it names like your anus. I always tell these people:

You're heinous.

What do you get when your family leaves rotting time fruits sitting out in the sun while playing games with each other?

Time flies when you're having fun.

Well my parents are finally sick of all my electronics puns.

Now I'm grounded.

Fun fact about myself

I invented the word "plagerism"

I went to an apple orchard today. I had a lot of fun but I kind of embarrassed myself in front of the attractive tour guide.

Yeah, I slipped in cider.

Finnish jokes poking fun at Sweden, translated to English (not 100% greatest translation)

-Swedish is an easy language to learn. For example, sit horse is sit ruuna (sitruuna = lemon)

-how do you recognize a Swede?

He pushes a pull door

-What is the difference between a chicken and a Swede?

-Chicken only lays eggs/fails (same word in Finnish) once a day
...

How much fun did the priest have at the weekend ?

Nun

Why is it no fun being an egg?

You only get laid once, you only get smashed once and the only bird who sits on your face is your mother.

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Never look at your wife's face while having sex

I did once and she seemed so angry. I could tell the other woman was having fun though.

Dark Joke are fun:

What has eight legs, four heads, and six arms?

The finish line at the Boston marathon.

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A man's wife sends him out to get some cigarettes

So he walks down to the nearby store only to find that it's closed. He goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine. While at the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers together, and then one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment.<...

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What if I tell you there is a way to stop all the kids in the school making fun of you because you are still a virgin?

Just start giving them bad grades.

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Living in the sewers seems fun

Apparently that's where shit goes down.

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth.

Then it becomes a soap opera.

Superbowl party!? Or superb Owl party?!

As a fun intellectual alternative to the sports balls.

We had a friend who liked to take photos of himself doing life-risking stunts for fun. We always discouraged him, but one time he got hit by a train at a railway station because of a stunt.

That time, it was painfully clear to us that he had definitely crossed the line.

By best friend just made fun of me after I got struck by lightning and had my nervous system damaged

And I must say, it really struck a nerve with me

Fun fact: there is a bank you can go to get gold without being arrested.

It’s called Reddit.

10 most funniest jokes ever.

So far have we gone, stressing up ourselves today. Let me remind you something, ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK A DULL BOY. What this popular saying meant is that we shouldn't spend all our time on work. At least, making out 20 percent of your total time should be enough fun.

Today, I have m...

We shouldn't make fun of Americans for how they are handling the pandemic

In these hard times, they are trying their best to bring some positivity to the world

On and On

Mr. Johnson told Mary his secretary that he was going on a business trip to Chicago the following day and he wanted her to come with him. They'd be staying there for 2 days.

As soon as she got home, she told her husband Bob about this.
"Honey, my boss asked me to go on a business trip to...

I played Oregon trail and made fun of a guy named Terry. He stabbed me...

I died of Dissin'-Terry

I gave my XBOX a 360, it was fun...

And I was like: "Wii!"

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Speaking of people with unusual physical traits:

I once knew a girl who actually had developed her breasts on her back.

She wasn't what you'd call all that good looking, but man she sure was fun to slow dance with!

During lockdown I built a new house

Lego is such fun

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A woman joins a country club and when she hears the guys talking about their golf round, she says, "I played on my college's golf team. I was pretty good. Mind if I join you next week?" No one wants to say 'yes', but they're on the spot…

Finally, one man says, "Okay, but we start at 6:30 a.m."

He figures the early tee-time will discourage her.

The woman says this may be a problem and asks if she can be up to 15 minutes late.

They roll their eyes, but say, "Okay."

She's there at 6:30 am. sharp and beats al...

Some people make fun of me because I have a baby face.

What can I say? I was born with it.

My friends and I were playing a game, where you have to think of famous Johns. The game ends if you pick a John that has died.

It's all fun and games until someone gets Hurt.

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High School on Valentine's Day

A high school thought it might be a fun activity to let the teenagers cut out paper hearts, put the name or wish of their valentine on the card anonymously, and hang them on a chainlink fence at the entrance of the school. Of course someone had to take them all off afterwards. So the day following V...

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Dad: I heard that you got punished for saying the F-word in class. That’s wasn’t fun, was it?

Son: No, it was Fuck.

Everyone keeps making fun of me because I don’t know what the word “apocalypse” means

Honestly, I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s not the end of the world.

Pandemic fun

CUSTOMER: why has your colleague got a larger plastic face covering than you?

SHOP ASSISTANT: that’s the supervisor.

Jumping with a rope can either be fun or sad.

It all depends on where the rope is attached.

Covid is canceling out all of these fun events like Circus’s, rodeos, and concerts.

In about a month, it will really be no Fair.

Having to wear a mask at school removes all the fun.

You never know who you're shooting.

Elevators are fun

They are always up to something;
and down for everything.

Have you heard the saying "Raining Cats & Frogs"?

Don't make fun of my lisp.

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A prostitute standing outside a motel in a small town saw a 70+ year old man walking past.

She hasn't had a customer for a while so she whistles at him and says, "Hey, would you like to have some fun time with me?"

The old man said, "But I won't be able to..."

Prostitute: "C'mon man.... give it a try... "

Old man says okay. They go in. The old man whips out his dick a...

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