UPJOKE
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Farting under the covers is no longer called a Dutch oven...

It's a free Covid test. If you can still smell or taste it, you're negative.
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The recipe said, “Set the oven to 180 degrees.”

Now I have no idea what to do, because the oven door is facing the wall.
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My mom wrote this joke: What's the difference between a sweet potato fresh out of the oven and a pig thrown off a balcony?

One is a heated yam and the other is a yeeted ham
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I just burned my Hawaiian pizza in the oven

I guess I should have put it on aloha setting
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Why should you never upset your oven

It might get too heated
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Our oven broke Thanksgiving morning

So we all went cold turkey.
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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says "Man, it sure is hot in here."

The other muffin shrieks " Ahhhhh! A talking muffin!"
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What did the twice-baked potato say before it was put in the oven?

Damn, foiled again!
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Instructions said to preheat oven at 180 degrees

Not sure i'll try this recipe again, turning the oven upside down was a real back breaker...
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"Hey, you've reached your oven...

you know what to do after the beep."
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Why your oven doesn't attend an university?

​​It already has at least hundred degrees​​
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If you pound chicken with a clay oven…

Does that tandoorize it?
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Mary comes home after tending to the garden….

Joseph has a warm pie on the table. He cuts Mary a peice of pie and she is thrilled by how amazing it tastes. So she asks Joseph, “Where did you get this pie from?”

Joseph tells Mary “I baked it!”

“Baked it?” Says Mary.

“Yes, right here in our home from scratch!” Says Joseph....
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A dad puts a deer in the oven and doesn’t tell the children what they’re having

Dad: “We’re having what Mum calls me”
Kid: “DONT EAT IT ITS A FUCKING DICK”

I found out my toaster oven isn't waterproof ...

I was shocked!
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If farting under the covers is a Dutch oven...

is doing it in the shower a German oven?
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What did the fridge say to the oven?

You're kinda hot
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What did the dutch man say when he invented the dutch oven?

Now we're cooking with ass!
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Just burned 2,000 calories.

That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
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You should never put anything in the oven at 180 degrees...

You are just going to drop all the food...
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Two muffins are in an oven

One turns to the other and says, “boy, it sure is hot in here!”

The other muffin replies, “Ahhhhh a talking muffin!!!!!”

(I’m terrible at jokes and this is the only one that I consistently don’t f*k up and my husband actually laughs when I tell it.)
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An Admiral was visiting one of his ships. While having tea, he noticed that every biscuit had the ship's insignia embossed on it.

He is very impressed and calls the cook to ask him how he does this.


Cook, "When rolling the biscuits, I slap each one onto my belt buckle before putting them in the oven."


Admiral, "That's pretty unhygienic !!"


Cook, "In that case Sir, I'd suggest you skip the...
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Roast beef and pork are both pulled from the oven

The pork says to the beef, "we meat again".

(Courtesy of my 8 year old)
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Why do they call me an oven?

Because when I get turned on things get really hot
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Why should you knock on the oven before opening it this Thanksgiving?

Because it could be dressing!

I’ll show myself out…
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What happens if you put a dildo in the oven?

You get dill bread.

When I opened my oven door a big rat ran out.

I tried to shoot him but he was out of my range.
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What kind of oven doesn't cook food evenly?

A baker's doesn't
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2 Muffins are in a oven

One of them says, it's hot in here,

The other one screams ahhh! talking muffin.


I know this is bad but my biology teacher said it and wanted to prove it was a bad joke.
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A 90 year old just told this: What happens when you drop the turkey out of the oven?

It's the downfall of Turkey and the overflow of grease.
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A cake in an oven

Society needs to stop discriminating, we don’t question a baker having a cake in the oven but as soon as I put 4 children and 2 horses in a volcano im the bad guy
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My friend’s grandma had two ovens and stored bread in one of them...

One day she preheated the wrong one

All the bread was toast
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The bread I made came out the oven shaped like a voluptuous womans butt!

I tried not to let it turn me on, but dat ass dough!

What do you call Marty McFly in the oven?

Roast Chicken
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I don't buy cheap oven mitts anymore

I've been burnt before
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The oven and the woman are just alike

Because you have to get them both hot before you stick the meat in.
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Everytime I hear, there's a bun in the oven

I can only think of the inefficiency in cooking one bun at a time.
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What do you call a small gesture of acknowledgement directed towards an oven?

A micro wave.
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I have this stupid obsession to check whether the oven is on and that the doors are locked.

I really hate my job at the crematorium.
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Did you hear about the baker that accidentally backed into an open oven...?

His buns were toasted.
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So I was baking a premade pie and the instructions told me to put it in the oven at 180 degrees.

Now I'm left with an upside down pie in an oven.
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How to make Bacon-Wrapped Duck at home:

Get yourself a duck of about 1.5 to 2kg, and two large bottles of Scottish whisky, bacon strips and a bottle of olive oil.

Put the bacon around the duck, and treat the inside with pepper and salt.

Preheat the oven for 10 minutes at 180 degrees Celcius.

Fill a large glass with wh...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I can't cook. My strategy for operating the oven is basically the same as my strategy for sex

I do my best to turn it on, then I stick my stuff in and hope for the best.

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What do ovens and oranges have in common?

Jews ^^^^^get ^^^^^it? ^^^^^orange ^^^^^jews? ^^^^^I'll ^^^^^show ^^^^^myself ^^^^^out ^^^^^now

The brownies I started making in my easy bake oven in 1987

are done if anyone wants some.
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An old man is at home on his death bed

When suddenly he smells something amazing. It's the smell of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. And with his last strength, he gets out of bed, and he goes to the kitchen, where his wife of 50 years, is cooking these beautiful chocolate chip cookies. And they are on a plate of four of them, just o...
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Splashed out and finally got a microwave oven. Its one of the really high tech ones.

Its got buttons and settings for all kinds of foods, even popcorn. Its got multiple power settings and a memory.

So I got a whole frozen chicken and popped it in. Pressed "Defrost", then "Chicken" then, "1.8 kgs".

The display showed 15 minutes and I pressed "Start".

Then the mi...

Should I mix up this cake batter before I put it in the oven?

Nah I probably shouldn't whisk it
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