What do you called pickled bread?

Dill-dough!

What do you call a pickled deer?

A dilldoe.

I tripped at a store and knocked over some pickled items.

An employee asked if I was ok.

I said that olive.

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The pickled cucumber factory

Darren used to work at a pickled foods factory. He worked with the cucumber slicer that would be one of the last steps before the cucumbers went into their little jars. Everything was going well, until one day, he came back to his wife feeling ashamed and sad.

"What's wrong, baby?" she asked....

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Pickled Penis(NSFW)

A woman and her husband were experiencing marital problems, to the point where they were no longer having sex. After visiting several counselors the problems were not resolved. The woman grew desperate, and was afraid to ask her husband for sex. In her desperation she visited a Gypsy, and explained ...

A man starts a line of pickled venison ...

...the most popular flavor so far is dill doe.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder

He sits at the bar for a drink. His pet monkey hops off his shoulder and grabs a handful of peanuts and swallows them whole. He next grabs some pickled eggs and swallows them whole. He then hops onto the pool table and swallows a pool ball.

The bartender says what the hells wrong with him. Th...

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I was teased about my penis size almost every day of elementary school.

I got called names like teeny weenie, micro dong, and pickled pecker.

If it weren't for that, being home-schooled wouldn't have been so bad.

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Problems at work

I've got to a change jobs", the patient said to his psychiatrist. "I've worked in a pickled onion factory for ten years, and last week I started to get this uncontrollable urge to put my dick in the onion peeler."
The psychiatrist explains about workplace stress and told him he must learn to re...

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A man walks into a pub..

And pauses. It's a really crappy place full of smoke and wood and the kind of men who look like they last moved during the second world war.

He walks up to the bar, and orders a pint. As he's drinking, he looks round and spots a huge jar behind the bar, with something long and pale and sausag...

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Jimmy and the "Classic-Vlasic-Ass-Lick"

Jimmy goes to see a beautiful dominatrix that all his buddies recommended.

He nervously tells her, "My friends said I should ask you for a 'Classic-Vlasic-Ass-Lick'. But they wouldn't tell me anything about it. What is it exactly?"

She explains, "Well, first I'm going to strip you na...

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Two morticians meet in a bar...

...and talk about their jobs.
The first mortician says to the other:
"Today I got a woman who had a clitoris like a pickled cucumber".
the other one asks: "What, so big?"
"No," says the first, "so salty!"

What's the difference between a person that just won the lottery and a fairy in salt water?

One is tickled pink, the other is a pickled Tink.

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Alan Finkelkraut goes to Israel to die...

Alan Finkelkraut, an upstanding member of the Teaneck Jewish community, upon his retirement at the age of 70 from the family furniture business decides that finally the time had come for him to make the move that he couldn't have before - to move to Israel where he can end his days.

Over a sm...

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Piper was out for a walk in the park with her boyfriend

Piper was out for a walk in the park with her boyfriend Peter when they were held up by two drunk hobos. Without warning, the bums start beating the shit out of him. During the fray, Peter screamed out, "for the love of God, do something!" As quick as she could, Piper unzipped the bum's pants and st...

If Alcoholics Had Written The Declaration Of Independence

would we have government of the pickled, by the pickled, and for the pickled?

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