These are old and possibly apocryphal, but just in case of the younger redditors haven't heard them:
Bessie Braddock: “Sir, you are drunk.”
Churchill: “And you, Bessie, are ugly. But I shall be sober in the morning."
Truman to Churchill on Churchill's replacement as PM, Clem...
A thief enters a theatre on opening night.
He stole the spotlight.
What did Blizzard do on Warcraft's opening night?
Farm gold in China.
If the opening night of my marijuana-smoked beef restaurant isn’t a success, I could lose everything.
The steaks are so high.
I tried to start a comedy club in outer space once.
But sadly there was no atmosphere on opening night.
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