6:30 is my favorite time, hands down.

But 3:15 is all right.

Benchpressing is the best gym exercise hands down.

Hands up
Hands down
Hands up
Hands down

I've heard a lot of people say that 6:30 is the best time, hands down

But, hey, 3:15 is pretty alright

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a prostitute with her hands down her pants?

Self-employed

Everyone talks about how May 4th is 100% hands down the best Star Wars holiday ever....

But only a fifth May deal in absolutes..

As the guillotine came down onto my wrists, I thought...

This is the worst day ever. Hands down.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is driving home when he spots the most stunningly beautiful redhead trying to hitchhike. He stops next to her, but just as he does an old man jumps out of the bushes and points a shotgun at him...

He points both barrels at the man and yells "Start jerking off!"

"W-WHAT?!" Yells the man

"Start jerking off or I'm taking your head clean off your shoulders!"

The man desperately unzips his pants and begins to masturbate, after a solid hour he pleads for the man to let him go...

Forrest Gump died and went to Heaven...

As Forrest approaches the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter greeted him.
“Ah, welcome, Mr. Gump. We’ve been anxiously awaiting your arrival.”
Forrest looked intently, not quite sure what to make of the scene in front of him.
“Forrest, before I let you into Heaven, I need you to answer three quest...

Toughest subject for a biologist

Hands down it is maths. When cells multiply, they get added up with additional cells; but to understand that, you need to know how cells divide.

So Sean Connery Died today.....

Couldn't he have died another day?



(Sean is hands down the best James Bond!)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A girl wants to introduce her boyfriend, Maggot, to her parents

Maggot is this big biker dude. He has a leather vest, a bushy beard, and of course his pride and joy: a Harley-Davidson he keeps in pristine condition by polishing the chrome weekly and rubbing the saddle with vasoline whenever it rains.

So, at dinnertime, Maggot arrives at the parents' house...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I went to a support group for masturbation addicts the other day.

It was the best meeting I've ever been to, hands down.

Sunday School

A little boy and a little girl were at Sunday school one week. Throughout the lecture, the little boy kept poking the girl with his pencil.

About ten minutes of poking and lecturing later, the teacher asks "Who created the earth?"

Little girl, tired of being poked by the pencil, slams ...

I've been learning to read an analogue clock

I’ve recently started, so far I can only tell 6:30 on an analogue clock but I’ve got that position hands down.

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