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Pulling Jokes

Pull

A guy drives into a ditch, but luckily, a farmer is there to help. He hitches his horse, Buddy, up to the car and yells, "Pull, Nellie, pull!" Buddy doesn’t move.

"Pull, Buster, pull!" Buddy doesn’t budge.

"Pull, Coco, pull!" Nothing.

Then the farmer says, "Pull, Buddy, pull!" A...

I was pulling my boxers off in bed last night

When the wife said to me,

“You spoil those dogs.”

A hunter shoots a deer and is pulling it back to his truck

A hunter shoots a deer and is pulling it back to his truck

A farmer passes by and says, "Hey you shot that deer on my property. That makes that deer mine."
The hunter says, "No way, I tracked it, I shot it, it's mine."
The farmer says, "Ok Ok...we'll settle this the old way."
"The ol...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did Buddha start pulling coins out of his butt?

Because change comes from within.

A lawyer’s wife died. At her grave, everyone was appalled.

The tombstone read, “HERE LIES PHYLLIS, WIFE OF ATTORNEY MURRAY WILLIAMS; SPECIALIZES IN DIVORCE AND MALPRACTICE”.

Murray burst into tears. His brother said, “You SHOULD cry, pulling a cheap publicity stunt like this.”

Murray said, “You don’t understand. I gave them my business card.”<...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a stripper pulling double shifts?

Twerkaholic

I’m great at pulling out! Just ask my kids…

Not a single one of them has gotten pregnant yet!

My friend got jailed 6 months for pulling 4 people out of a burning building.

Turns out they were firefighters.

"Don't call me a Necrophiliac ever again" he said while pulling up his pants.

She didn't reply.

In solidarity with much of the world pulling Russian products off the shelves ...

In solidarity with much of the world pulling Russian products off the shelves and banning them from events, I will do my part and not play Russian Roulette for the foreseeable future.

I kept pulling the string from my Christmas hat and now its half the size

Oops, wrong thread

Like pulling teeth

I had a wisdom tooth going bad and the dentist told me it wouldn't be worth filling the cavity and she just sent me to an oral surgeon to get the tooth pulled.

So I get there and I'm in the chair and I tell the guy "I've never had a tooth pulled." He was pretty seriously bothered that I used ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do Donald Trump and his father have in common?

They both have shitty judgment when it comes to pulling out.

I saw a man pulling a length of rope behind him on the street the other day...

Me: Why are you pulling that rope?

Man: You want to try pushing it!

Remember when radical extremists were just kids pulling sick stunts off on their skateboards?

Gnarly.

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