UPJOKE
breakbustcrumbleburstsnapseparatewearsplitpuncturesmashladderruncrackfragmentcrush

Why did the male doll fall apart after Barbie friendzoned him?

Because he became Bro Ken.
upvote downvote report

Why did the pharaohs marriage fall apart?

Pyramid Scheme
upvote downvote report

It’s ok if you fall apart sometimes.

Tacos fall apart and we still love them.
upvote downvote report

I went to the optician today because I keep seeing the world fall apart.

He said I have 2020 vision.
upvote downvote report

Why did the USSR fall apart so quickly?

Because they're always Russian out there.
upvote downvote report

A school robotics team made an ultimate weapon, and needed ammo that makes everything fall apart.

That’s why they used common core standards.
upvote downvote report

A cop just stopped me for jaywalking and then tasered me after exchanging a few words...

Police: Turn around.

Me: Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you’re never coming round...

Police: TURN AROUND!!

Me: BRIGHT EYES, Every now and then I fall apart. And you I need you now tonight, and I need you more than ev--AHHHHHH!
upvote downvote report

What's the difference between IKEA and Theresa May?

A cabinet designed by IKEA doesn't fall apart so easily.
upvote downvote report

It's hard to tell jokes about lepers

They always seem to fall apart at the end.
upvote downvote report

What do my life and my sandwich have in common

They both fall apart right in front of my eyes
upvote downvote report

A joke my mother told me today

A British man comes to a village and is given saag^1 on bajra roti^2. He eats the saag by itself and returns the roti to his hosts, saying "Here is your plate."

1. Saag is a mushy dish made with boiled spinach or mustard greens

2. Bajra roti is a flat bread made from millet, it has no...
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Life is a lot like Jenga

If you don’t pull out correctly, everything can fall apart

I have a joke about leprosy...

But it would probably fall apart at the end.
upvote downvote report

3 years ago during my first reservists training

I am from Singapore and all relatively healthy males need to serve the army for 2 years and 10 reservist cycles

During my first reservists, many of our combat boots start to fall apart due to the adhesive hardening up and breaking apart, thus many of us have to walk to the store to purchase ...
upvote downvote report

Boys are like bras..

They are cute and supportive until you use them too long and then they fall apart...

...also that's when the support ends
upvote downvote report

What do Atlanta's overpasses and the Falcons have in common?

They're on fire for the first two hours but completely fall apart by the end.
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Farmer John and his wife Mary lived on a big piece of land in the middle of Ohio.

They did pretty well for themselves, but as all affluent farmers will know, farming is not easy money. After a few years of living together and working very hard, their marriage started to fall apart. Being just as determined to keep their marriage together as they were to keep their farm running, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New motorcycle

Credit to Bob Zany (I believe). I heard this on the Bob and Tom show this morning. This won't be exactly how he told it but it should be close.

A guy buys a himself a motorcycle from his neighbor. The neighbor tells him that he needs to rub Vaseline over the motorcycle before it rains or it w...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.

Do Not Sell My Personal Information