UPJOKE
attainfractureturncomejustgetalleveneene'enopportunity costdemolishbefore nighteven upeconomics

How can you always break even at the casino?

Play the change machines.

Strong bed (not original - translated)

Man to carpenter - make a very strong bed so it does not break as my son will sleep with my daughter in law on it after marriage
Carpenter - don't worry sir I will make such strong bed it will not break even if whole colony sleeps with your daughter in law

Three laws of thermodynamics

First Law of Thermodynamics: You can't win. Second Law of Thermodynamics: You can't break even. Third Law of Thermodynamics: You can't stop playing

One of my 9th graders told me this joke. A guy was being investigated by the IRS...

A guy was being investigated by the IRS. After dodging the agent for weeks, his family convinced him to go get a lawyer and go talk to the irs agent.

The guy goes to see the lawyer and they ride together to the IRS office to see what the problem is.

The IRS agent meets the guy and te...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If I had $100 for every time I'd had sex

I might break even.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband and wife are in a terrible car crash

The wife walks away with some minor cuts and bruises, but the husband is in critical condition and is rushed into surgery.

After 5 or 6 hours in the waiting room, the wife sees the doctor approaching in blood-stained scrubs.

"I've got good news and bad news," he says. "Which would you ...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.