A demolition company recently made the decision to demolish a stable.

Of course, there were some neighsayers, but that’s to be expected.

I bought some TNT online to demolish a dilapidated building. I set it off but it never exploded.

2/10 would not bang

Holy crash

A rabbi and a priest get into a car accident and it's a bad one. Both cars are totally demolished but, amazingly, neither of the holy men is hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the Rabbi sees the priest's collar and says,"So you're a priest I'm a Rabbi. Just look at our cars. Theres nothing le...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Best pals, Frank and Paul, are out for a day of golf. On the third hole, Paul accidentally putts the ball into a field of buttercups. Determined to get the ball back onto the green, he demolishes half of the flowers in the process. As he raises his club to take another swing...POOF! Mother Nature

appears. "What have you done?!! As punishment for destroying my precious buttercups, you shall have no butter for your toast ever again. No butter for baked potatoes either. Actually, no. You shall have no butter for anything...for the rest of your life!" And then, POOF! She was gone.

In tota...

An elderly man on a Moped, looking about 100 years old, pulls up next to a doctor at a street light.

The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks, 'What kind of car ya got there, sonny?'

The doctor replies, “1500+hp Porsche 917/30. It cost half a million dollars!”

'That's a lot of money,' says the old man.
'Why does it cost so much?'

'Because this car can do up to ...

City council wanted to demolish the local clown museum.

They couldn't because it's a hysterical landmark.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I heard they're demolishing Hitlers house

Anne Frankly, I'm surprised they didn't do it already. I hope they step on the gas and burn the place down.

A Statistician, a Physicist, a Mathematician are stuck inside of a demolished building.

A Statistician, a Physicist, a Mathematician are stuck inside of a demolished building.

They find 3 cans of canned beans to survive for the day. They soon realize that they don't have a can opener to open the cans.

In a hurry, the Statistician continuously hits the can on the wall to b...

They demolished my local Domino's Pizza shop...

yesterday, and then all the other shops on the street fell down.

Bribe...

A farmer consults a lawyer friend for his case. He had built a house in the plot of another farmer and now the other farmer has sued him, demanding the house demolished.

The lawyer calmly explains the farmer is in the wrong, he should not have built a house on another person's land. He advise...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two nuns stand by the road, holding a sign..

"The way you've taken is wrong, stop and turn back now, before it's too late!"

The next busy driver, who looks at the inscription, shows a sparse finger and disappears behind the curve. A second later a loud crash is heard.

One of the nuns thoughtfully says,

-Sister, shall we ju...

Why do they sell booze at the hardware store?

Because nothing is better than alcohol at demolishing a home.

A devout Christian man living in New Orleans refuses to leave his home after hearing news of an imminent hurricane and flood.

A richly devout Christian man lives alone in New Orleans. He keeps to himself mostly, isolating himself in prayer and self-reflection with little care for the outside world.


One day, the man notices it growing dark outside earlier than normal. He steps outside and feels the wind has pick...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A rich cheapskate hires a local handyman from the want ads.

The handyman shows up in overalls, chewing a piece of straw in his teeth. "What y'all want done 'round here?" the bumpkin asks.

"I need you to demolish my porch. Smash it apart, and haul the scrap away to the junkyard."

"Alrighty!" says the bumpkin. "I'll have 'er done in a jiffy." And...

The man with a hammer...

In a small town in the countryside lived an old man all alone. He worked as a demolisher and all he had was a hammer.

One day he was called in to take down a small cabin by the river. It was just a room and he divided his work into five days. The first day he took down the roof. Second day h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A beautiful prostitute attended a high profile function..

When it was time for introductions you could hear, I am Dr this and that, professor this or that, Barristers, engineers this and that.
When it was the turn of the prostitute, she calmly said she is a Civil Engineer.
Another curious engineer in the room got interested and asked her for area o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Intelligent life

The U.N. wanted to contact other worlds in hopes of finding intelligent life in the vast of space. So they gathered all of earth greatest minds to work together to complete such a task. After years of failing to reach life in space, the program was starting to crumple and the top minds abandoned shi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Terrifying Story

A guy in a taxi wanted to speak to the driver so he leaned forward and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, jumped up in the air and yanked the wheel over. The car mounted the curb, demolished a lamppost and came to a stop inches from a shop window. The startled passenger said "I didn't ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One goes East, one goes West...

It is a Friday night, and everyone is heading home for the weekend. An Army Sergeant leaves the base late, heading west for his home. Across town, at another base, an Air Force Sergeant also leaves late, heading east.

The snow starts blowing, and the sun sets. On the highway, both Sergeants ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three friends decide to sell their three ducks...

The first man takes his duck, knocks on a stranger's door, and says "Hello ma'am, would you like to buy my duck?" The woman says, "Sure I will give you $5 for your duck." The man says "Great" and they make the exchange.

The second friend goes up to another house, knocks and asks the owner if...

A head-on collision occurred between a man and a woman.

Both emerged from the scene intact while their cars were totally demolished. The man said, "This is quite a predicament. We should drink a toast to celebrate this miracle." The woman replied, "What a great idea; I just happen to have a bottle with me." With this she handed it to the man. The man dow...

Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader were having a lightsaber battle...

...and Luke is getting demolished. He knows that unless he does something drastic, he's going to lose.

So, thinking quickly, he says to his opponent, "Darth Vader, I know what you're getting for Christmas."

Darth Vader hesitates for a moment and says, "How do you know?"

Luke re...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.