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Back Door Jokes

Q: If your dog was barking on the front door and your wife knocking on the back door, who should you let in first?

A: The dog, because at least it would shut up once it got in.

Try the back door!

I was banging this nice Lady over her kitchen table when we heard the
front door open.
She said, "It's my husband! Quick, try the back door!"
Thinking back, I really should have ran - but you don't get offers
like that every day.

What do you call the area between the front door and the back door at Nandos?

The Peri-Perineum

What were the two hemorrhoids doing by the back door?

Just hangin’ out.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A locksmith works on a back door to a house as a man approaches.

The man is irate, as he’s constantly paranoid that his girlfriend is cheating on him.

“What’re you doing at my house? Are you spying on my girlfriend!?” The man barks, as the locksmith was currently eyeing the keyhole. The locksmith explains that he’s there to fix the door and the man calms d...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three Girls and The Back Door

A young man was curious as to what girls thought about sex in the "back-door". So, out of curiosity and a lack of shame, he decides to ask three different girls if they would like to try it in the "back door".

The first girl he asked was American, and when asked about her opinion she punched ...

My Grandfather is always going on about how in the old days people could leave their back doors open.

That's probably why his submarine sank.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I was having sex with this woman...

I had her bent over her kitchen table, giving it to her good. When all of a sudden we heard a car door slam out front.

“Oh god,” she said, “it’s my husband. Quick, use the back door!”

Well, I probably should have left at that point, but it’s not an offer you get everyday...

An Irish Man Walks Into A Bar...

...and stumbles to the bartender. “Barkeep, Oi’ll have a point”, he slurs.

The bartender looks him over critically. “A pint? Sorry sir, but I can’t serve you. You’re clearly too drunk.”

The Irish man scrunches his eyebrows, peers at the barkeep, turns around and trips out the front doo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy walks into a bar...

...and sees a gorgeous woman nursing a drink. Walking up behind her he says: "Hi there, good lookin'. How's it going?"
Having already downed a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says: "Listen up, buddy. I screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One night as a bartender is closing up his bar, he hears a knock at the back door.

When he opens the door, there stands a bum who asks, "Can I have a toothpick?"

The bartender gives him a toothpick and continues cleaning up his bar.

Five minutes later, he hears another knock at the door. Again, there stands another bum who asks, "Can I have a toothpick?"

The b...

A husband and wife are going out for the evening...

Before going out they always put their cat out for the night.

An Uber arrives to pick up the couple and as they walk out of the house, the cat runs back inside.

The husband goes back into the house to chase the cat out, and the wife walks out to the Uber. She doesn’t want the driver to...

I was just washing up in the kitchen with the back door open, when an owl suddenly flew in, dried all the pots, put them away and flew off.

it was a Teat Owl

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