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It's way too soon for Kobe jokes.

They never land well.

George Bush started cracking a 9/11 joke, but one of his advisors whispered, “Too soon.”

It was September 10th.

Too soon for COVID jokes?

COVID is like fashion…

We started hearing about it in Italy…

Became popular in LA and NYC…

Florida ignored it…

And it was all made in China in the end.

I know it's way too soon, but... How many times did Tiger's SUV roll?

FOUR!!!



I'm going to Hell.

Too soon

What is making a joke about Alex Tribek's cancer diagnosis?

What’s an old joke told too soon?

We really are going to be talking about the hindsight of 2020 for the rest of our lives.

Guys biggest fear.... Too soon.

Girls biggest fear.... Late.

Too soon?

Why do muslims extremists drink instant coffee?

Because they hate the french press

No joke will ever be too soon for Joan Rivers thread.

Joan Rivers died doing what she loved to do best. Surgery.

It’s too soon for coronavirus jokes.

They’re tasteless. And smell-less.

People say Steve Jobs died too soon.

But I think its a fitting metaphor for his company's attitude to battery life.

Probably too soon to update this, but here goes anyway. . .

Twenty years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, Johnny Cash, and Aretha Franklin. Now we have no jobs, no hope, no cash, and no soul.

Is it too soon to joke about the mars rover?

There is way too many good puns for it to be a missed opportunity.

Is it too soon for a bill withers joke

Or should we wait until after bill withers

Too soon maybe, but today's event are proof that men do everything better than women...

Active shooter couldn't even kill anyone but herself

Chewbacca too soon joke?

Anyone have any?

What did the doctor say when he couldn’t revive him? It was a wookie mistake.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

William Shakespeare once said "Better Three Hours Too Soon Than a Minute Too Late"

My wife disagrees.

It's really put a strain on our sex life.

Is this too soon

Every Christmas Santa seems to skip Indonesia, he just gives them a big wave

Is it too soon to say a Hurricane Harvey joke

Or should I just wait for everything to blow over?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Is it too soon for a Robin Williams Joke?

It's been a few weeks, so I think the waters are safe for this joke I told my cousin:


David Carradine and Robin Williams are in heaven, Carradine looks at Williams and says, "what do you mean you weren't jerking off?"

My mom said it's too soon to make coronavirus jokes

But if we wait any longer, it'll be a disaster!

Is it too soon for Bill Cosby jokes?

Yeah, best to avoid Cosby punch lines.

Ferguson joke. Too soon?

Black guy walks into a bar in Ferguson. Says to the bartender, "Give me a Michael Brown." Bartender says "Ok. Put up your hands." the gave him six shots.

Why did Steve Jobs die too soon?

Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How does a guy tell his girl he ejaculated too soon?

Quick cummunication.

It's probably too soon for Ebola jokes on here...

...but when the time comes, I bet they're gonna be killer.

Too soon?

How long til somebody writes a rap song about Burt Reynolds? A Reynolds rap, if you will.

Too soon for a knock knock joke?

"Knock knock"

"Who's there?"

"The pilot, let me in!!!"

Rob Ford..too soon?

*Some* people though it would be nice if Rob Ford could be mayor for tumor years.

I peaked too soon in high school.

I'm still sending her child support.

Why do Americans rarely tell jokes about mass shootings?

Because it’s always too soon….

How many Texas cops does it take to save children from an active shooter?

Still under investigation.







Edit: For those who assume I think any part of this situation is funny... [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black\_comedy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_comedy). Also who gave me a Wholesome award? That's seriously messed up.

Edit ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Four prisoners are killed in a prison bus accident

A drug dealer, a car thief, a bank robber and a rapist all die and are sent immediately to hell. Once there Satan begins checking his documents and says he isn’t ready for them. He says “you died a little too soon. So we don’t have anywhere to put you. I will be clearing out a few places for you but...

Good thing Chris rock didn’t make fun of hilaria baldwin.

Too soon?

What would Amy Winehouse be doing if she were alive today?

Scratching at the lid of her coffin.



Too soon?

Sarah was so excited to be travelling without her parents for the first time

As soon as she entered the bus, she told the conductor to remind her when they reached Entebbe and soon they were on their way.

After a while, she asked the conductor, "Have we reached Entebbe?" "No," the conductor answered.

She asked again after some time but the answer was still the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told a joke about premature ejaculation, but nobody laughed.

...What, too soon?

Mother Theresa goes to Heaven

Mother Theresa walks through the pearly gates and sees princes Diana. She asks the angel Gabriel..."Hey...I spent my whole life working to help others...why does Diana have a halo and I dont?" Gabriel answers..."That's not a halo...that's a steering wheel"

Too soon?

Women love hunters

Top 10 most important men for women:-

1. The doctor because he says, "Take off your clothes"
2. The dentist because he says, "Open Wide"
3. The hairdresser because he says, "Do you want it teased or blown"
4. The milkman because he says, "Do you want it in the front or in back?"
5...

Tiger Woods won't be able to play the Masters this year.

Having difficulties with his driving.


Too soon?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How did Kanye find out that Kim was bound, gagged, and held at gunpoint?

She released the video on pornhub.


(Too soon?)

When I heard that Kevin Hart was injured in a car accident, I was really worried for my kids.

They use the same brand of booster seat!

Too soon?

EDIT - thank you mysterious benefactor for my first gold!

EDIT 2 - Shout out to u/LethKith who wants me and my whole family to die in a fiery car crash. I hope you have a good day buddy. Try to relax and enjoy the joke for what ...

I was going to make a joke about lifting the mask mandate in Texas

but it's too soon.

My wife Ruth just died at age 78

Is it too soon to call myself Ruthless?

What’s the biggest benefit of getting Covid?

You can’t taste your wife’s cooking

Too soon?

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