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Swing Around Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The animals in the zoo were talking amongst themselves about the recent drought...

The cows said they hoped it would rain soon as the fields they grazed in were dry and turning brown.

The giraffes said they hoped it rained soon as the leaves on the tops of the trees were sparse.

The monkeys hoped it would rain because the branches of the trees were dry and snappin...

The Boston Zoo had a large problem.

The Boston Zoo had a very large problem. Their most popular attraction, a gorilla named Jamie, had died unexpectedly in the night. Ticket sales were projected to plummet if this gorilla couldn’t be seen, so the zoo manager decided to hire a man to dress up in a gorilla costume and pretend to be Jami...

The janitor at the zoo

A janitor at a zoo gets called into the managers office. The manager tells him they have to let him go due to budget issues. The janitor is set back and cries, "please, please let me keep my job! My mother is in the hospital and I have to pay her medical bills!" The manager scratches his chin for a ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man died and went to heaven...

*Courtesy of a comment by* u/garlopf *on a previous joke of a similar type.*

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, a pleasant breeze brushing past his face, he saw a huge wall of cocks behind him, all of various sizes.

Surprised, he asked...

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