Mother's Jokes - 17 Hilarious Mother's Jokes

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A woman grants her mother's unusual dying wish.

She specifically requested pictures of her right foot be sent to an address in Rhode Island.

A couple of days later, she realizes that reversed pictures of her mother's *left* foot were sent instead. Unsure of the importance, but determined to fulfill her wishes, the woman travels to Rhode Is...

Mother's Day

Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother's Day morning. As she lay there looking forward to breakfast in bed, the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen.

But after a good long wait she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eat...

Mom asks, "Are you going to take me out to a restaurant for Mother's Day?"

Kid replies, "We have food at home"

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What's the difference between /r/jokes and your mothers vagina?

Your mother's vagina gets some new content every once in a while.

Tomorrow isn't just mother's day

It's son-day as well

A single mother wakes up from a coma after giving birth to twins...

She asks the doctor "Where are my babies? I want to see my babies!"

The doctor says "Not to worry, your babies are safe and at home with your brother. You had two healthy babies, one boy, and one girl, but unfortunately I do have some bad news."

Immediately thinking the worst, the moth...

This Mother's Day, my dad got a new car for my mom.

He said it was the best trade he's ever made

Mother's Trick.

John and Mike are 2 roomates. One day John's mother visited them for a day.
While they were all eating dinner, the Mother was looking at the two boys and how they were acting. It didn't help that Mike was extremely handsome, which made the mother wondering if there was something more between t...

For Mother's Day, I bought my mom new beads for her abacus...

It’s the little things that count...

A mother takes her teenage daughter to her gynecologist appointment

The doctor performs a routine test and discovers the teen is pregnant. Her mother's face turns beet red. If smoke could escape her ears, it would fill the room.

The daughter pleads, "Mother, the doctor must be wrong, I've never even kissed a boy!!"

Upon hearing this, the doctor get up ...

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Instead of "Mother's Day" and "Father's Day"

It should be "Mother's Day" and "Motherfucker's Day"

What do you call your mother's mother's mother's sister?

Your great antique.

Follow up Joke: what do call your father's father's father? Old as hell.

Both jokes courtesy of the 10 year old comedian in my house.

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There was a little boy whose mother was about to have a baby. One day the little boy walked in and saw his mother naked.

He asked his mother what the hair between her legs was.

She responded,"My washcloth."

Weeks later after the mother had the baby, the young boy walked in on his mother again. While she was in the hospital, the doctor shaved her pubic hair.

The boy asked his mother, "What happen...

Happy Mother's Day to all you moms out there ...

... And to the rest of you mother f\\\*\\\*kers.

The eldest of three siblings comes up to his mother and asks: "Mommy, mommy, why is my name Leaf?"

"Well, honey," the mother says, "it's because when you were a little baby, a leaf landed on your head."

Satisfied, the child goes away.

Later, the middle child tugs at her mother's hand. "Mommy, mommy, why is my name Feather?"

"Well, darling," the mother says, "it's because when...

Rumor is that Toy Story 4 will focus on

Andy's mother's toys, which coincidentally are called Woody and Buzz too.

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[Serious] I need help finding a joke for my mother's funeral

It was one of her favorite jokes but I can't remember the build up. It was something like....someone asked the virgin mary if she was proud of Jesus and since she was a Jewish mom she answered "you know, I really vanted he should be a doctor"

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