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Can't Stop Laughing Jokes

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My Patient just told me this joke and i can't stop laughing

George was turning 90 this week and his friends thought of doing something special for him. So they planned to contact a high class Escort service and send him a nice surprise.



On his birthday, around 9 pm, when he was alone at home, the doorbell rang. George thought - who could it b...

Man comes to heaven and he can't stop laughing

Jesus:"Man, why are you laughing so hard"

Man: "Why not? Doctors are still trying to complete surgery"

What do you call a magic user that can't stop laughing?

A Wheezeard

A Blond walks into a gas station...

and asks the employee: "I locked my keys in the car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?"
Ten minutes later a trucker comes in and can't stop laughing. So the employee asks him why he is laughing. The trucker says: "There is a Blond who tries ...

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What do you call a gassy vampire?

Flatula


I misheard somebody say spatula and thought they said this and now I can't stop laughing. It's so fucking bad..

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Rodney Dangerfield: "Y'know, my wife and I, we never have sex...

... we get undressed, we can't stop laughing."

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Piss Poor Luck

A guy walks into a bar, and slams down a wad of cash and tells the bartender he's on a lucky streak all night. After a few drinks, the guy asks if anyone in the bar are willing to bet hard cash, and the Bartender points him to an area in the back of the bar.


A little over an hour later, t...

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Pocket Tazer Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife

Very Long Read:

Pocket Tazer Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife.

A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Tazer for their anniversary submitted this:

Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversa...

This one is just gold

Found this one while playing a game, and i honestly still can't stop laughing:

A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and...

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