I was planning to take Astrophysics as my last college course but it turns out to be full. So I have to take some other course to graduate.
It’s…not Rocket Science.
Give a teen a pizza, they'll be full for a day
Give a teen a tide pod, they'll be full for the rest of their life
/r/jokes Must be full of insecure men...
I keep seeing posts wrongfully flagged "long"
What’s worse than a box full of snakes?
A box that was SUPPOSED to be full of snakes.
Another Jewish mother...
A Jewish guy calls his mother in Florida.
"Hi, Mom. How have you been?"
"Not so good. I've been feeling weak."
"Weak? Why are you feeling weak?"
"I haven't eaten for 28 days!"
"Twenty-eight days?! Why? What's wrong?"
"I didn't want my mouth to be full of foo...
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are walking along the beach one day and come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it.
"I give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total" says the Genie. The Irishman says "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I wish all the oceans to be full of fish for all eternity and a fleet of fishing boats to catch them." So, wit...
An Irishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman...
...are robbing the manor house.
One of them trips the alarm and before you know it the cops arrive with sirens blaring and lights flashing.
The three unlucky gents are in the kitchen, and looking around the Scotsman spies three empty sacks in the corner..." right lads....in the sacks...
If there are 502 bricks in a plane and 1 falls off, how many are left?
>!501.!<
How do you put an elephant in a fridge?
>!You open the door, put the elephant in, and close the door.!<
How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
>!You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and close the door.!<
So, the ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A man was cleaning out the basement of the house his grandfather left him...
...when he came across an old metal oil lamp. The man starts wiping it off with his shirt when two genies emerge from the lamp.
"Holy shit!" the guy exclaims.
"We are the genies of the lamp. We have been stuck inside that lamp for decades, and you have freed us. We will grant you three...
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