UPJOKE
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What do Mexicans use to cut pizzas?

Little Ceasers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I overheard my neighbor say she had a shitty day, so I anonymously sent her a meat lover’s pizza

She’s a vegan and I hate her fucking guts

Our local pizza guy has been arrested for selling drugs

I have been a loyal customer for years. I honestly had no idea he was selling pizzas

I got a new job delivering pizzas.

Nobody really likes liver on pizza anyways.

What's the difference between a Humanities student and a large order of pizzas?

One of them can feed a family.

1000 Pizzas

a guy walk into the pizzaria and ask: hello, do you have 1000 pizzas? the staff tell him: nope. day after he come back to the pizzaria and says: hey do you guys have 1000 pizzas? the staff tell him. sorry no. 1 day after the staff makes 1000 pizza and the guy come and ask: hey. you guys have 1000 pi...

How do Muslims like to make their pizzas spicy?

They add halalapeño.

Pizzas topped with German sausage..

.. Are the wurst.

I ate 3.14 pizzas today, you know what I got?

I got fat!
What, did you expect a pi joke?

You order one pizza and you love it. Next time you order a pizza and a garlic bread. Before you know it, you're eating pizzas for every meal and you get withdrawal symptoms if you don't get one...

That's the domino effect...

Why are pizzas circular?

So there's enough to go around.

What kind of pizzas did Good King Wenceslas like?

Ones that were 'deep & crisp & even'

There are 2 pizzas in the oven

The first pizza says " aaaaah, it's hot in here!"

The second pizza says " aaaaaaah, a talking pizza!!!"

I had to start deliverin pizzas

Cause i knead the dough

What's the difference between two 10" pizzas and one 14" pizza?

One pi

If you order two pizzas....

is that called a Tau-zza?

A man returned to the U.S. after a trip abroad feeling very ill.

He goes to see his doctor and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo a barrage of extensive tests. He's negative for COVID, Ebola, Malaria, and pretty much all the recognizable infectious diseases.


The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone...

What kind of pizzas did Al Qaeda deliver to the World Trade Center?

Two large plains.

Darth Vader asked the Emperor how many pizzas he should get...

Palpatine: order 66...

What do pizzas and parents have in common?

If they are black, you have nothing to eat.

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