I was walking home late one night when I saw dozens of giant cupcakes and pies everywhere. It was kind of scary.
The streets were oddly desserted.
How many pies can an explorer eat before they go deaf?
Two: a pie an ear!
My flirtatious neighbor called me and said that she bought too many zucchinis and ended up making two cheese and zucchini pies. She said I was welcome to come over and take one, and she also had some left over herbs that I could have.
So I went over, and she told she had just finished reading a Cosmo article called "which traffic sign are you?"
"Which traffic sign would your ideal woman be?" she asked me seductively.
I said " Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with I just want your extra t...
Why did the shipwrecked pirates get to eat cakes, cookies and pies when they washed up on shore?
It was a desserted island.
Not every pies in the world is round, sometimes...
If I have 5 pies in one hand and 6 pies in the other, what do I have?
Adele’s undivided attention
Did you know it's cheaper to buy pies in warm weather climates?
Cherry pie in Jamaica - $4.25 Blueberry pie in Cuba - $3.50
Those are some of the pie-rates of the Caribbean.
I’ve always wondered about the price of pies around the world
In the Bahamas they’re $9 a pie. In Jamaica they’re $8 a pie. In Cuba they’re $7 a pie.
And those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Simple Simon met a Pie-Man on his way to the fair. Simple Simon said to the Pie-Man "What have you got there?" and the Pie-Man said
"Pies you stupid fuck"
I asked a baker where does he go to get his pies weighed. He said “somewhere over the rainbow”.........
Weigh a pie
What type of pies take up the most time?
Why didn't Santa get any mince pies on Christmas?
Because it was stollen.
How easy is it to stroll along on pies?
Well, it's no cakewalk.
Life pro tip: always be nice to pies.
You don't want to hurt their fillings.
Met an old sailor once in a bar. Sat and talked for a while and asked him if he heard of Jack Sparrow. Suddenly he started telling me about how in Jamaica, beef pies cost $1.50. Goat pies cost around $2 and apple pies are about $2.50.
In Trinidad the prices are roughly the same. Cheese and o...
The New Market on the Corner
A new market opened up in Bill's neighborhood, so he decided to go down and see what they had for sale.
Inside appeared to be different produce stands, but, strangely, all he saw were bakery stuffs on the shelves. One was covered in pies and labeled "Pineapple Pies - $2/lb." Another was cover...
A man was watching a baker make pies...
After the baker rolled out the pastry, lined the pie plate, put in the filling he put on the top layer of pastry & carefully trimmed off the excess pastry. The baker then removed his upper dentures & proceeded to use them to tamp down the pastry around the circumference of the pie plate afte...