UPJOKE
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Nachos Jokes

I'm making deer nachos for dinner tonight because it's the most American meal I could think of

The corn and deer were here to begin with, Europeans just brought the cheese and a Mexican did all the work anyway.

You guys like jokes about nachos?

Nvm... It's too cheesy...

What do you call a row of trucks hauling nachos?

A cheesy pickup line.

Brought nachos to salsa class

Huge misunderstanding

My son said: "Dad, once I reach 99 pounds, I will eat one pound of nachos.

Then I will be 99% your son and 1% nacho son."

What do You Call Tortilla Chips With Guns?

Loaded Nachos

What do you say to someone who wants your nachos

These are mine, nachos

What do you call a hispanic man who spilled his nachos?

A messycan

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Mexican man cannot find work and finally heads home for the evening.

On his way home, he finds a cross at the bottom of a hill. So he kneels and prays to God, "Please God, let me find a way to feed my family".


At the top of this hill, a black man was walking home from grocery shopping when the bottom of his bag gave out and a cheese wheel rolled straight ...

Yeah, I like NFTs...

Nachos,


Fajitas &


Tacos

What do you give Sean Connery when hes eating nachos in a bathtub?

Shower Cream

I work with mentally disabled people. Today I tried to tell a client the Nacho Cheese joke.

"Hey, you have nachos! What do you call cheese that isn't yours?"



"Tasty!" -Holds up a-okay sign-



"...Well...you aren't wrong!"



Happy Valentine's Day everybody!

A man walks into a bar, and begins reading the menu overhead the smoking hot bartender.

The sign reads as follows:


* Nachos $4


* Hamburger $3


* Hotdog $2


* Grilled Chicken Sandwich $3


* Grilled Cheese $2


* Fries, Onion Rings, and Tater Tots $1.50


* Handjob $10


After he looks over the menu for a mome...

This is a little science joke my friend told me.

A 99kg man asks his friend “if I eat 1kg of nachos, does that make me 1%nacho.?” The friend replied to that
“Well the human body is made up of sodium, oxygen, carbon and hydrogen. So that practically makes us 100% NaCHO”

How do you get 14 babies in one bucket?

With a Blender.

How do you get them out?

With Nachos.

Wife said looks like it’s gonna be chilly again tonight.

I said no that’s nachos.

A poor mexican went to a hill to pray for a way to feed his family

As he was praying a black guy was walking nearby with groceries when he dropped his cheese wheel and it rolled to the Mexican. The Mexican grabbed it, praised god, and ran home.

When he gets home he instructs his wife to make nachos with the cheese.

"Why nachos" asks his wife "we can...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Baby Jokes [NSFW] [NSFL] NOT SAFE FOR ANYONE.

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take off your boots before you jump on a trampoline.

How do you make a baby spin around?
Blender.
How do you take it back out?
Nachos.

What do you call a dead baby on a wall?
Art.
What do you call a dead baby ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two men and a wheel of cheese

Two men and a wheel of cheese (Long)

*** This joke is better said than read, but imagine the accents and it’s funny as heck (I think at least...)

A Mexican man is down on how luck. His hours were cut at work so he is having trouble making ends meet. Because he’s a man of faith, he de...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Turns out my wife likes Mexican food more than sex.

When I asked her if she wanted some dick for dinner, all she said was “nachos.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Grammar of F***

Transitive Verb: "I want you to fuck me until I can't walk."

Intransitive Verb: "We fucked until my dick fell off."

Phrasal Verb: "I'm going to royally fuck you up."

Noun: "That guy is such a dumb fuck."

Pronoun: "Look who fuck-face over there brought to the party."
...

At the Bee Prom...

A young bee nervously flies around hoping to grab a dance with the queen bee. Finally he musters up the courage and talks to her. She looks at him and says "I'll dance with you if you get me some fruit punch"
Excited, the bee zooms to get the punch. He sees the line for nachos, the ice cream mach...

(Long joke) A man is dying of a rare disease...

This disease has left his body covered in large, bright, yellow, pus-filled craters and has grown exponentially worse over the course of a few months. The man is told by numerous doctors that there is no cure to his life- threatening illness and he doesn't have much time to live.

A Make-A-Wi...

There was a man with leprosy

Jim had leprosy which was bad because he had constant sores full of pus. The doctor said he could keep him alive but could do nothing about the sores. Because of this Jim could never wear a shirt as it would be soaked with pus and ruined.
One day Jim's friends decided to take him to a baseball g...

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