How many anti-vaxxers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They're happy living in the dark

How many antivaxxers does it take to change a lightbulb?

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It's not my job to give you the answer. Do your own research.

How many germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One.
We are very effective and don´t have a great sense of humor.

Guten Tag!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many pessimists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. I am screwed, lightbulb is screwed, the whole fucking world is screwed

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many redittors does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers ...

How many beans does it take to make Irish bean soup?

239. Because one more would make it too farty

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two, obviously. How they got inside the lightbulb is the part I don't understand...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many Freudian psychologist does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to hold the penis...

LADDER! I meant ladder!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shit load of light bulbs!

How many conspiracy theorists does it take to change a light bulb?

The real question is that who broke the light bulb and why are they keeping us in the dark?

edit.. thanks for the award kind stanger.

How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?

Both of them.

How many plumbers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A boss to tell the plumber, a plumber to tell the helper, and a helper to get the electrician to do it.

How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. Trump says it’s done and they all cheer in the dark.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

...

...

...

...

... ten tickles.

How many cities does it take to start a global pandemic?

Only Wuhan.

How many of my mother does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh, no. No, no, you go out and have fun, I’ll just sit here in the dark. No, no, it’s fine. It saves on electricity… that way, I can leave more in my will.

How many psychoanalyst does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. But, it takes years and years of therapy, and ultimately the lightbulb has to want to change.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Clearly more than 2, because my basement is still dark AF

How many r/jokes users does it take to change a light bulb?

1000, one changes the light bulb and the others will start upvoting it and copying it and having orgies

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many reddit users does it take to replace a lightbulb?

1 to make a post about it,
4 to mention that its the wrong forum,
1 to post it to the right forum,
7 to suggest op should post it to the electronics forum,
2 to post it to the electronics forum,
1 mod to delete the second post,

3 to suggest an image post would have gathered mor...

How many jamband fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They wait until it burns out and then follow it around the country.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?

None, reports say he fell

How many idiots does it take to paint a wall?

101 - one to hold the brush and the other 100 to move the wall.

How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?

None. It should be open by the time she brings it to him.

How many Buzzfeed writers does it take to turn on an electric chair?

Ten. But number four will shock you.

How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

It's a really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it.

How many members of Stack Overflow does it take to change a lightbulb?

Closed, question seems like off-topic

How many hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, hippies screw in sleeping bags and under tarps in the woods

My wife is a paralegal and said there's no such thing as "paralegal jokes," here's my attempt: How many paralegals does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Four. One to screw in the bulb, one to log the bulb paperwork into the system, one to draft a summary on the changing of the bulb, and one to submit a report confirming the other two submitted their reports.

How many redditors on r/jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?

87.

1 to install the replacement and 86 to point out it’s already been used before.

A control freak has 5 kids, how many of them does it take to change a light bulb?

There's no point in trying, none of them can change anything.

How many perverts does it take to put in a lightbulb?

Only one, but it takes the whole emergency room to get it out

How many of Shakespeare's characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three. One to change the lightbulb, one to contemplate how a lightbulb is as mortal as any human, and one to spend the afternoon debating whether to murder his uncle.

How many Brexiteers does it take to change a light bulb?

One to promise a brighter future and the rest to screw it up.

I stole this from one of [elee0228](/u/elee0228) comments.

How many men does it take to defend Paris?

No one knows, it's never been tried.

How many journalists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three:

One to report it as an inspired government program to bring light to the poor.
One to report it as a conspiracy to deprive the poor of darkness.
And one to win a Pulitzer Prize for reporting that the electric company hired someone to break the lightbulb in the first place.
...

Q: How many managers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. At least 4, plus a victim. One to hire the victim to screw it in for them, a second to supervise the victim, a third to start nit-picking about the way the bulb is being screwed, and a fourth to screw the victim by firing him. They take the credit though none of them actually touched the light bu...

How many Lithuanians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one, unless their arms got ripped off in some sort of horrifying accident, in which case it still only takes one, just a different one.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They’ll never get it done because they always end up fucking the pool boy while their husbands are at work instead. Fuck you Linda

How many writers for "The Simpsons" does is take to change a lightbulb?

None. They won't admit that it burnt out 15 years ago!

How many Republican does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Twelve to investigate Obama’s involvement in the failure of the old bulb, 23 to deregulate the lightbulb industry and 51 to pass a tax credit for lightbulb changes.

How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They're afraid of change- even if it makes the world a brighter place.

(Edit: Folks, take a breath. It is a joke.)

(Edit: Thanks for the silver, gold, and plats)

How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

11. One to put the bulb in the socket and ten to drink until the room spins.

How many trump supporters does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, I've stopped counting.

What does it take to turn a Trump Supporter into a socialist?

$1,000

How many GoT plot writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Only two, but they'll wait 6 or 7 seasons before screwing it up.

How many lab rats does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

More than 500, but we've exhausted our funding.

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