UPJOKE
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A man has been arrested for publically masturbating while reading out loud from a law book, all the while imagining legal cases.

Though he got off on a technicality.

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New shoes

A young sexy woman went to the mall with her husband and spotted a pair of designer pumps in the window of an upscale shoe store and began staring, imagining how sexy she'd look wearing them…
The husband looked over and saw her and interrupted, "No fucking chance love, they're way too expensive! ...

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I Am The Viper! (Long)

A young man inherited a stately manor from his uncle after his untimely passing. The man's uncle was in reasonably good health, but was found dead in his library. His body bore signs of poisoning, but there was no one else with him the night of his death and no poison was found in his system or on t...

I was just imagining Shrek trying to comfort Fiona while she gave birth to triplets.

"Better out than in ae Fiona"

Imagining Kid Rock's nemesis

Li'l Paper Scissors

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