While daydreaming, I started having an imaginary argument with my wife.
I still lost the argument.
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Johnny was daydreaming in class when the teacher called on him
“Johnny, if there are five birds on a wire and one gets shot how many are left?”
After thinking for a brief second Johnny responds “zero”
The teacher looks at him inquisitively and states. “Johnny, five minus one is four”
To which Johnny replies “yes but if you shoot one bird t...
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What is the difference between a daydreamer, a psychopath and a psychiatrist?
The daydreamer builds a Castle in his mind, the psychopath lives in it and the psychologist collects the rent
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Many people daydream about being on the top of Mount Everest,
It turns out they're already super high.
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What's the difference between a daydreamer and a pervert?
A daydreamer stares out of windows.
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What did the hat say to the other hat that always daydreamed?
You need to snap back to reality.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
I Got Pull Over Today (real conversation with cop)
So….today I got pulled over about 15 feet from the front of my building on my way to work for rolling a stop as I was putting my seatbelt on. I just left it unbuckled so he didn’t think I was trying to pull one over on him.
Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: Because I’m an...
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My friend got mad at me because I had a wet dream when I stayed at his house...
it was a daydream.
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There was once a dog who wanted to be a bear....
Every day since early childhood, the dog would daydream about being a bear.
One day, the dog was strolling through the forest when he encountered a bear. Delighted, the dog asked the bear to convert him into bearhood.
The bear thought about it for a bit and agreed. He'd help the dog ...
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The neighbors (I've only heard it told in Russian but don't know if it's originally Russian)
Yuriy is walking along the sidewalk one day when he notices posters advertising a competition for the whole town. The contestants have to swim across a river which no one has ever crossed before due to extreme rapids and plant the town's coat of arms in order to impress incoming administrative offi...
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A guy's working as a cashier at Best Buy
He finds his job a little dull, but from where he's stationed he can see out to store entrance to the parking lot (and more importantly, the sky) outside. He spends a lot of time looking out the store entrance and daydreaming, but one day he notices a blond woman walk up to the store with a bunch of...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Little Fisherman
Somewhere near a big lake lives Jon together with his cat.
Early in the morning Jon wakes up, washes his face and goes to the kitchen. He takes his bag of bread, takes out a few slices and butters them up. puts some cheese on it and stores them is his bread box. Picks up his fishing pole an...
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