Why did they bury the Scottish man on the West side of the hill?
Because he was dead
A husband and wife were relaxing at home when all of a sudden it started to snow...
Their show was interrupted by a news broadcast instructing everyone to park on the west side of the street to allow the snow plows to run. The woman jumps up and grabs her keys to move her car immediately. The next night the snow is still unrelenting and the broadcast instructs everyone to p...
What's the only thing more terrifying than Thanos wearing the Infinity Gauntlet?
Thanos wearing the Infinity Gauntlet while playing a Jet in a production of West Side Story
The roof job
Two Roofers, Bob and Dan, were putting a new roof on a barn when a bundle of shingles slid down the slope and knocked the ladder over.
Bob and Dan decided since it was early they would continue working because someone would surely come around by quitting time.
It was nearing 5 PM and ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Woody Allen's Moose hunting joke
I shot a moose once. I was hunting upstate New York, and I shot a moose. And I strapped him onto the fender of my car. And I'm driving home along the West Side Highway, but what I didn't realize was that the bullet did not penetrate the moose. It just creased the scalp knocking him unconscious. And ...
Putins army is on an assault in Ukrainian.
And a platoon is making their way through a Wooded area when someone heard a twig snap over the hill in front of them. The commander sends a scout out in front to find out what was in front of them. Some minutes go by and their scout calls out “an Ukrainian man is spotted about 200….. pzzz” and t...
Priest hears man's last wishes
His priest, his lovely wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are at his side. He asks for 2 witnesses to be present and a video recorder be in place to record his last wishes. He begins to speak. "My son, John, I want you to take the Epic Ocean houses." "My daughter Donna, you take the apart...
Three guys were at the gates of Heaven.
God says to each of them, "If you tell me how you died, I'll let you into Heaven."
The First guy looks at God and says, "I live in an eight story apartment building and my apartment in on the seventh floor on the west side of the building. I had left work early because I had an assumption tha...
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