When does it become socially acceptable for adults to build little hideouts out of pillows again?
When they’re in their forties
Have you heard about those new corduroy pillows?
They’re making head lines.
Yesterday and today I stuck my hand inside feather pillows.
Is it normal that I'm feeling down?
Did you hear.. corduroy pillows are making it all over the news lately?
(Really?)
Yeah. They're making lots of headlines
A Serb, a Croat and a Bosniak are arrested in Iran for drinking alcohol.
The court sentences them to 10 whip lashes each, but everyone is allowed to make a special request beforehand.
First up is the Serb. "I request a pillow strapped on my back!" he says. After 2 lashes it rips apart and his back gets completely torn open.
Second up is the Croat. "I reques...
A British man, a French man and a Spanish man are caught stealing in a foreign country.
They are prosecuted and the judge sentences them all to 100 lashes each. However he wants to look lenient in the eyes of their respective countries so he reduces the lashes to twenty and allows them to have two requests each before being lashed.
The Spanish is first to be lashed and requests...
So a German, an Englishman and an Irishman
were all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze when they were arrested by Saudi police. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so they are all sentenced to death!
However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to app...
I’m the scientist who just discovered that goose-down pillows are NOT resistant to sulphuric acid.
Although, apparently that’s not what my wife meant when she said we need to “experiment in the bedroom”
I created a poll to see if people preferred pillows stuffed with bird feathers or pillows stuffed with synthetic material.
Synthetic material didn't win. Too many down votes.
My dog has been humping pillows… I think he learned it from watching me.
I’m just glad he’s still afraid of the vacuum cleaner.
Have you heard about these new corduroy pillows?
They've really been making headlines.
-courtesy of my 8 year old niece.
For those who dare steal Death's pillows..
Prepare yourself for the reaper cushions
I just invented corduroy pillows
My friends tell me I’m stupid but I think they will make headlines worldwide
Memory foam pillows are the worst.
As soon as I lay down on them, I start remembering all the things I messed up during the day.
Why do some coffins have pillows? They aint gonna wake up with a sore neck
Thats like thinking about what college you want your unvaccinated kid to go to
I don't understand why women like to have so many pillows on the bed..
You need only one to smother your husband.
Did you hear about the Corduroy pillows in the news?
They’re making HEAD LINES! (my mom told me this one today after I got home from work)
After my retirement at the company I worked at for 50 years, I looked forward to some relaxation time and putting my feet up, but my wife had other ideas...
... she insisted I take her to the local shopping centre every day.
Like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and out.
She's like most women - loves to browse & leaves me with endless time to fulfill.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter,...
My pillow
I designed my own pillow. The pillow to rule all pillows. The perfect dimensions, the perfect stiffness, the perfect material. I sought the finest fabrics from around the globe and set to work on my grandest creation. It took months, but I finished. The last step was to transport it from the se...
Was about to throw out my old pillows, then I thought
na, I'll sleep on it.
Why do Pillows work?
Cause they're white
I said that all pillows are uncomfortable and my friend slapped me.
He said that’s a very blanket statement to make.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, 'Seven Points.'
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, 'Seven Points.'
His wife rolls over and says, 'What in the world was that?' The old man replied, 'its fart football.'
A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, 'Touchdown, tie score...' ...
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