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Operated Jokes

What’s the difference between Boba Fett and a Time Machine operated by Marty McFly?

One’s a Mandalorian and the other’s a manned DeLorean.

A guy is in an accident and wakes up in hospital after being operated on

The doctor says "well sir, I have some bad news and some good news.
The bad news is that we had to amputate both of your legs.

But the good news is that the guy in the next bed wants to buy your shoes"

I recently asked a friend who operated a crematorium about how COVID had affected him

He said all the extra work left him feeling burned out

What do you call a concession stand operated by Isis?

Allahu Snackbar

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was a kid I hated how the church operated

Its all quiet and dark



All the sitting down and standing up and kneeling



I wish the priest would just pick a position and fuck me

I met a surgeon who operated on ears, noses and oaks

He was an E.N.Tree surgeon

My friend just confessed to me that he had a third nipple and he’s had it operated.

He really needed to get it off his chest.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was a man in Ukraine who operated a train for a living.

He showed up to work one day extremely drunk and starting hitting people on the tracks, killing a few before he was caught and arrested. State law deemed that death via the electric chair was an acceptable punishment for his deeds.


The day he was put to death, they asked him for any last ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sex without light

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light.


Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bill suffered an excruciating pain in his balls since childhood. No doctor could ever diagnose what was wrong with them. So finally, they suggested him to get them operated.

After the operation, now being a free man, with slightly lesser pain than earlier, he was happy and wanted to start his life afresh. So he went to the garments shop closest to the hospital.

'Excuse me, I'd like to buy a suit, could you please take my measures?' said Bill to the owner of the s...

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