I tried to organize a hide and seek tournament.

But good players are hard to find.

My local store organizes their shampoo aisle like Ajax.

Head and Shoulders above the rest.

Heaven is a place where the police are English, the cooks are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian, and everything is organized by the Swiss...

Hell, on the other hand, is where the police are German, the cooks are English, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and everything is organized by the Americans.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.

I lost the Rock’s paper scissors.

How does the solar system organize a party?

**They planet!**

Today I was turned away from an LGBTQ organized event. To think I thought they were inclusive.

This is the last time I take my pack of lions to a pride parade.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Having some areas in pandemic lock down and others not in lock down is like...

trying to organize the pissing section in a swimming pool.

Why does organized crime have that common criminals don't?

A con-census.

I organized a "Fat Lives Matter" march. We all got very tired...

I can't breathe.

My town organized a competition yesterday to find out who is the best contortionist.

My friend entered himself and won.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

We decided to organize an intervention for our friend, who is addicted to taking laxatives.

I said, “This shit needs to stop.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A big trip to the mountains with married women and their mothers-in-law was organized. They would go there by separate busses (the women in one bus and the mothers-in-law in another).

During the trip to the mountains, the bus carrying the mothers-in-law had a flat tire. Suddenly the bus driver lost control and the bus fell off the mountain, at least a couple thousand meters downhill. No chance anyone in that bus survived it. Obviously all of the women started cheering up, startin...

Why was a group of lemurs framed for organized crime within seconds?

They were a conspiracy.

Never ask a felon to organize something numerically

Not unless you're prepared to handle the con sequences.

Every year I organize a patient-relative charity event to benefit Alzheimer’s research.

I tell the patients to invite their whole family but nobody ever shows up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An American anthropologist is studying cultures throughout Western Africa.

He discovers an isolated civilization in the West African Jungle. It’s a small village with wooden houses and plenty of domesticated animals. The anthropologist is impressed by the organization of the village and becomes eager to learn more about the culture of it’s inhabitants.

He approa...

Why do your heart, liver and lungs all fit in your body?

Because they are well organized

I organized a threesome last night.

There were a couple of no shows, but I still had fun.

What do you call a mediocre member of organized crime?

A mafiososo.

There was once a robot whose job it was to organize all the shelves of a massive library that had thousands of books. Every day he did his job without missing a beat. One day though, he didn’t show up to work. The librarians were all perplexed that a robot would do something like that...

Turns out he had become shelf aware.

My weekend is looking like a poorly organized herb gardener.

Nothing but thyme on my hands.

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