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Organize Jokes

I organized a threesome last week.

There were a couple of no shows, but I did alright.

Heaven is where the cooks are French, the police are British, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and everything is organized by the Swiss.

Hell is where the cooks are British, the police are ~~German~~ American, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and everything is organized by the Italians.

How does a librarian organize their music collection?

They use the Dewey Decibel System

How does NASA organize a party?

They planet

What brand of sports clothing do personal organizers wear?

Under Armoire

I organized a threesome last night.

Two no-shows, but all in all a good time!

I'm trying to organize a hide and seek tournament but it's really difficult... Good players are hard to find."

but it's really difficult... Good players are hard to find

What is the difference between the government and organized crime?

Only one of them is organized.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Finnish and a Japanese company decided to organize an annual rowing competition with 8-man teams.

A Finnish and a Japanese company decided to organize an annual rowing competition with 8-man teams. Both teams trained long and hard. When race day came, both teams thought they were in top shape, but the Japanese won by far in the mile.

After the defeat, a defeatist mood prevailed among the ...

A father wanted to help organize his daughter’s wedding day …

He wanted the party to be extravagant, but wanted to spend as little money as possible. He had finished all of the other jobs he had been given, and he was left to work on the cake.

"Why not get it ordered from an upscale bakery?" his wife said.

So the father visited a ton of different...

Elon Musk organized a press conference about his project to solve global warming

"I will build giant sunglasses"

Journalist raises her hand. "How does that stop the earth from warming up?"

"It makes it cool"

After many years of Burning Man, the organizers decided to change the theme this year.

For the first time in history, we welcome you all to Drowning Man Festival.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The head of an organized crime syndicate realized his accountant had been skimming money from him for years.

Unfortunately the accountant only spoke Russian. So the boss hired a Russian interpreter and busted into the accountant’s home.

He tells to the interpreter, “tell him I want to know where my money is, AND I WANT TO KNOW RIGHT NOW!!” The interpreter conveys the message in Russian and the acco...

A son says to his father: "Dad, I'm thinking about a career in organized crime."

Father: "Government or private sector?"

We’ve been trying to organize a Fear of Commitment workshop.

But we just can’t seem to nail down a date.

What do you call it when robots organize an African themed party?

BotsWanna Party

How does NASA organize their company parties?

They planet.


[Please take pity on me i am very unfunny :(]

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.

I lost the Rock’s paper scissors.

Never ask a felon to organize something numerically

Not unless you're prepared to handle the con sequences.

How does Snoop organize his weed?

In chronic-logical order

How does Max Payne organize his list?

**BULLETS.**

How do they organize a party on Mars?

They planet.

My five year old told me this today.

What kind of protests do flatbreads organize?

Naan-violence

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How does Hitler organize his juice?

By concentration

Small Organ

A fellow picked up a girl in a bar and took her home with him. After some preliminary drinks and talk, they got undressed, climbed into bed and generally got organized for a leg over.

After a few minutes, the girl started laughing. The fellow asked her what she found so amusing.

"You...

Don't get involved in organized insect crimes.

The mothia is ruthless.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

We decided to organize an intervention for our friend, who is addicted to taking laxatives.

I said, “This shit needs to stop.”

Every year I organize a patient-relative charity event to benefit Alzheimer’s research.

I tell the patients to invite their whole family but nobody ever shows up.

What's the first thing in organized ghost does in the morning?

Makes a to boo list

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