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Motors Jokes

The Estate of Nichola Tesla sues Tesla Motors to reclaim the name...

Elon Musk is unfazed.

He renames his company to teXla.

Alliance Motors are saying that the latest Range Rover is a Marvel.

DC must be jealous.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If General Motors Built Cars like Microsoft...



This is an old joke and sadly some of this has come to pass.



If General Motors Built Cars like Microsoft...

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology li...

General Motors will introduce 2 new warning lights for their cars!

One to tell you that you need a new engine and the other to tell you that you need a new car.

Have you heard about the new French tank? It had fourteen motors.

13 go in reverse.


The last one goes forward, in case the enemy attacks from behind.

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General Motors finally solved their workplace diversity dilemma

There are equal numbers of black, white, brown, red, yellow, and orange robots. Half the robots have penises drawn on them.

What do you call a car dealership owned by a former coroner?

Rigor Motors

If you want to be a General Motors engineer, your memory needs to be perfect.

You have to recall everything.

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What is the name of the business that sells hearses?

Rigor Motors

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New company mergers

(I marked it NSFW because of the last one - not sure if it's considered NSFW, so just to be safe...)

For all of you with any money, be aware of these expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations:

1. Hale Business S...

It’s nice to see that celebrities have taken up book writing during the pandemic

One Direction by Kanye West

Guitars by Mel Gibson

Mining by Brad Pitt

Pear Cider by Katy Perry

Ship Building by Tom Cruise

How to Move Things by Jim Carrey

Escape from Prison by Morgan Freeman

American Motors by Harrison Ford

Wild Animals by Wi...

I should never have bought that car from the guy at...

Ulterior Motors.

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The wife and the game warden

One morning a husband returns to the cabin after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.
Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out, since it is such a beautiful day. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Wa...

Who are the highest paid generals in the military?

General Motors, General Electric and General Dynamics

The unlucky man

There was a very unlucky man , who whenever starts a job, they go bankrupt in a week, whenever he goes to a wedding, they get divorced in a month, whenever he buys a car, it get wrecked in days, ...etc

one day he decided to run away, thinking that even if he brings his bad luck abroad, ...

Russians have General Winter

Americans have General Motors

Remember when...

... the General Motors jobs were in Flint, and you couldn't drink the water in Mexico. And now...

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The Jew says...

A Catholic, a Protestant, a Muslim and a Jew were in a discussion during a dinner.

Catholic: “I have a large fortune… I am going to buy Citibank!”

Protestant: “I am very wealthy and will buy General Motors!”

Muslim: “I am a fabulously rich prince… I intend to purchase Microso...

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Newby Salesperson (Long joke)

NOTE: My husband thinks this joke is sexist, but I think it's hilarious.

A young man desperately needed a good paying job, so he applied as a salesperson for a large, everything-under-one-roof store.

The manager, seeing how young the man was, was doubtful he could sell anything, but th...

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