What time will the frost form?

In dew time.

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Which is the number 1 cereal brand in Asgard?

Bifrosties

*holy shit almost crapped my pants with excitement when I came up with this. GF not as excited, I'm counting on you guys

A woman dies and finds herself at the gates to haven.

When she gets there, she is confused as she saw how many others are standing and sitting outside, cracking eggs, mixing batter, and baking something.

She turns around and sees an entire section dedicated to decoration, with elaborate concoctions of strawberries, frosting, and tiering at every...

Why did the snowman name his dog "Frost"?

Because Frost bites.

You wouldn't think that a pastry frosting made from magical trees would be very good,

but it's actually enticing!

A blonde called her boyfriend and said,

“Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to put it together or how to get it started.” Her boyfriend asked, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?” The blonde said, “ According to the picture on the box, it’s a tiger.” Her boyfriend decide...

Pedro gets a New Secretary.

He faces a volley of rapid fire questions from his wife, who is always a bit suspicious of her husband’s roving eye.

Dora (Pedro's wife): “Does your new secretary have nice legs?"

Pedro: “Didn’t quite notice."

Dora: "What color are her eyes?"

Pedro: “Haven’t had the time ...

I came home to find my little brother putting cake frosting on his elbow.

When I asked him why he said, "I told mom that my elbow hurt and she asked me if I tried icing it".

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If robert frost was bisexual...

He would have gone both ways.

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Two brothers, 9 and 11, realized one day that they had never said a curse word and decided that in order to fit in, they had to upgrade their dirty vocabulary.

The next morning at breakfast, their mother asked the younger brother what he wanted to eat.



The younger brother replied "I want some Frosted Flakes, bitch."



The mother stood silent for a moment, and then smacked the boy on the back of the head. She turned to the older ...

Jesus promised the end of wicked people. Thor promised the end of frost giants.

I don't see many frost giants.

I grew up in a pretty tough neighborhood. Kids use to cover me in chocolate and frosting and put cherries on my head.

Life was tough in the gateau.

Did you hear about the Kung Fu Baker?

If people tried to rob his bakery, he would beat the up and throw frosting at them yelling CAKE this!

TIL the creator of Corn Pops also invented Cocoa Puffs, Frosted Flakes, Froot Loops, and Apple Jacks

His tombstone just says "cereal entrepreneur"

So, there's a world, and it's only inhabited by Cheerios.

And in this cheerio society, there are three social classes in which you can reside. The lower, plebian, plain Cheerios. They work in factories and fields. Then, there are the middle class honey nut Cheerios. They are kind if like middle management. Then, there are the mega upper class, bourgeoisie ...

A little girl is building a big puzzle..

She has all of the pieces out on the table when her parents walk up to her and ask what she is doing

'I'm building this puzzle! I think its a tiger, but its really hard.' says the little girl.

The parents look at the box, then at each other, then the dad picks up the little girl and t...

A cake walked into a bar...

It was gonna try to find it's owner because it was celebrating his 50th birthday.

But when the people saw the cake they were very puzzled. What is this thing? (Seeing very well that it had legs and arms)

The cake replied, "I am a cake looking for someone named- ooh I don't remember b...

So Robert Frost and his wife are lost in the woods

Robert Frost remarks to his wife "We've got miles to go before we sleep"
And his wife replies "Well maybe if we hadn't taken the road less traveled by we'd be there already"

I bought a generic frosted flakes box...

THEYYYYYY'RE...



...alright, I guess.

I don't mean to sugarcoat

But I got you Frosted Flakes instead of regular corn flakes

A guys car broke down in Alaska.

A mechanic came by to look at it and said "looks like you blew a seal" the guy replies "no thats just frost on my moustache"

Why did frosty the snowman have to go to the dentist?

He has a very bad case of frost bite.

My friend stopped talking to me after I lost 3 of my toes to frost bite.

I didn’t know he was lack toes intolerant.

How does Jack Frost get to work?

By icicles

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What do you call a Snowman's jizz?

Jack Frost

Ogden Nash and Robert Frost die and are facing St. Peter at the Pearly Gates...

St. Peter doesn't recognize them and asks for identification. They both respond that they are great poets from Earth and are surprised that they're not recognized. St. Peter challenges them - "If you're such great poets. let me hear you form a rhyme for "Timbuktu".

The poets think for a mom...

Snow job

So an Eskimo ( Inuit if you live in Can ) took his broken snowmobile into the garage for some repairs. The mechanic checked it out then looked up at the fellow and said. "I think you blew a seal." The Eskimo quickly wiped his face. " No, no that's just frost!" he replied.

What Dandruff Shampoo Does Guy Fieri Use?

Frosted Flakes.

Thought of this on the ride home and I am still laughing. Sorry for the bad joke, I needed to share.

Heard this from a coworker

Mr. Red, Mr. Green, Mr. Yellow, Mr. Orange, and Mr. Blue all live on the same street.

Each morning, Mr. Red wakes up in his red room, in his red house, pulls the red covers off of his bed, puts on his red robe, opens his red door, goes down his red stairs to his red kitchen and gets his red b...

what do you call a muscular snowman?

Jacked Frost

What does a snowman eat for breakfast?

Frosted flakes

Baking a Cake

A father and his son take a trip to the zoo. They are walking around to each exhibit and soon realise they came to the zoo in the middle of mating season.

The son was very young and every exhibit throughout the day he asked his dad the same question. "Dad what are those animals doing?" "Oh d...

A blonde is putting together a puzzle. She is very frustrated and asks her husband for help.

"It's supposed to be a tiger!" she cries.

"Honey," says her husband wearily, "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box."

A Blonde Tries To Solve A

A blonde has been working on her new puzzle for a couple days now but can't seem to get it right. One day, her husband comes home to his wife crying at the kitchen table. He rushes over and asks his wife why she was crying, and she replies "I've been working on the puzzle forever but can't figure it...

A mother comes down to the kitchen and finds her daughter up early, eating a bowl of cereal...

The daughter asks- “Mommy, I heard some strange sounds coming from your bedroom a little while ago. What were you and Daddy doing in there?”

The mother is instantly embarrassed.

“Um... your daddy and I were making a cake, sweetheart.”

The next morning the mom comes down and t...

What do you call a nudist beech in Alaska?

Frosted tips

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Look mom, I'm black!

A little boy sees his mom making a chocolate cake. While she's not looking, he paints his face black with the frosting. Happily, he says "Look Mom! I'm black!" The mom immediately whips his ass and says "Go show your father what you did!". The little boy walks to the living room and says "hey...look...

I took the road less travelled by

But so did everyone else because they saw it on Google Maps and now we're all stuck in traffic. -Robert Frost

A Blonde Puzzle Joke

The blonde is sitting at the kitchen table, staring down, head in her hands, sobbing.
She picks up the phone and calls her husband who had just left for work.

"What's up honey?" the husband asks as he answers his phone.

"It's this puzzle" she sobs. "I ....... I ....... I just don't ...

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Sven and Ole

Sven is sitting on his porch one day, enjoying the morning Norwegian frosted air, when he sees his neighbor Ole coming down the road.

Ole has his hands lightly cupped together as if he's holding a delicate insect from escaping.

Sven pipes up and hollars "G'mornin Ole! what's that ya go...

So there's this cheerio who works at Burger King...

And he's a fantastic employee. He constantly washes tables and takes orders without complaints.

Every month, the Burger King Corporation throws a cheerio employee of the month party. It's always been Honey Nut's dream to go, but Fruity always gets to go. Every. Damn. Month. But not this mont...

This girl I took home from the bar wanted to role-play. I told her I would be Tony the Tiger.

But apparently a "Frosted Face" isn't good. Or great.

The Tale of Two Cheerios

One day, a lone cheerio goes to a party and finds a pretty female cheerio. He says to her "Hey there, beautiful. Would you like to go out with me?" The female cheerio says "Sorry, but I only date frosted cheerios." The male cheerio then goes home and looks to see how much money he has to get himself...

A husband walks in and sees his beautiful, young blonde wife

A husband walks in and sees his beautiful, young blonde wife sitting at a table with a box and all its contents scattered about on the table top. She has a puzzled, frustrated expression on her face as she moves the pieces around.

He asks... "Honey, what are you doing?". To which she replies...

A blonde joke (that i didn't make nor take credit for)

A blonde wakes up one morning and decides she wants to do a puzzle. So she reaches into the cabinet and grabs a box. After 4 hours of trying to match the pieces together she finally breaks down and calls her boyfriend for help.

Blonde: "I've been trying to get this puzzle together for over f...

n Eskimo was out for a drive

An Eskimo is out for a drive one day when his car breaks down and is forced to call a mechanic. Finally the mechanic arrives and he sets to work, looking under the bonnet until he locates the problem. He looks up at the Eskimo and says, "You've blown a seal, mate" to which the Eskimo hastily replies...

Lazy vultures

Two lazy vultures had procrastinated on flying south for the winter until the first frost hit, then they got worried. "We better catch an airplane to Mexico, lets go to the airport!" So they take off down the road, and as luck would have it, they come across two dead road-killed opossums, that had...

A blonde calls her boyfriend...

One day a man gets a call from his blond girlfriend.

"Hey Babe!"

"Listen, I need you to come over right now! I'm doing a puzzle and I think it's supposed to be a tiger but I just can't figure it out, I've been doing it for hours..."

The boyfriend was a little confused, as she d...

The Cheerio Joke

Oh boy do I have a joke for you...
Its called the cheerio joke.

\-------------------------------------

So there is this land called cheerio land and in cheerio land there are 7 classes of cheerio, 0-5 and the frosted cheerios. Now there is this level 0 cheerio. Hes hom...

I got arrested today

I got arrest today, apparently you aren't allowed to do doughnuts within 200ft of a school zone... the frosting worked as great lubricant though

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] On a midnight train to Georgia...

A man and a woman, total strangers, find themselves sharing the same double bunk-bed passenger cabin on the 10:15 PM Amtrack express to Atlanta due to a mix-up at the ticket office.

It's the middle of winter. There's frost on the window, and the shitty Amtrak maintenance means the heat is ou...

So in Cheerio Land there are 4 levels to the social hierarchy.

At the bottom you've got plain cheerios, these are your basic working class folks.

Above them are the honey nut cheerios, more of the middle-management level cheerios.

After them are the fruity cheerios, you know, the real artsy, middle-class types.

At the top are the frosted ch...

A Day in the Life of a Cheerio

One day in Cheerio City, an ordinary young Cheerio started his day. He decided to get a job. He was nearing his sell by date and figured it was time. There are three social classes in Cheerio City: the Regulars, the Wheats, and the Frosteds. The young Cheerio was simply a Regular and had little to n...

What do you call an Penguin with dandruff?

Frosted Flakes

There once was a cheerio...

There once was a cheerio who lived on plain cheerio island. He lived his life working 16 hours, 7 days a week, trying just to make ends meet. But all of this was pointless; he was not going anywhere in life. He would never end up with the prosperous cheerios on Frosted Cheerio island - or so he thou...

There are two types of people in this world..

People who can stay on track and, oh how I love frosted flakes.

Seasonal Jokes

Spring
Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
A: Pilgrims!
Summer
Q: What do you call a dog on the beach in the Summer?
A: A hot dog!
Q: Why do bananas use sunscreen?
A: Because they peel.
Fall
Q. How you mend a broken pumpkin?
A. With a pumpk...

What did the snowman eat for breakfast?

Frosted snow flakes.

My 4.5 y/o son came up with this joke, but his punch line was "snow flakes". I added the "frosted". Teamwork.

A blonde is trying to put together a puzzle

She simply cannot figure out how to do it, so she calls her boyfriend.

He asks her: "What is the puzzle is supposed to look like when finished?" and she replies, " it's supposed to look like a tiger."

He drives to her house, and when he gets there, he begins laughing hysterically....

The Redneck Poet

Robert Frost and a redneck came to heaven's gate at the same time. St. Peter stood at the gate with instuctions for the two: ''You cannot enter the gates of heaven until you can make up a poem and recite it to me using the word 'Timbuktu' in it.'' Robert Frost stepped up and recited a magnificent, g...

Idiot question and answer

Q: On which side does a chicken have the most feathers?
A: The outside.

Q: How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed?
A: Your nose touches the ceiling.

Q: What’s a flea’s favorite way to travel?
A: Itch-hiking.

Q: Why did the snowman call his dog Frost?...

Stranded snowmobiler

A guy was riding his snowmobile through the woods when it unexpectedly broke down. He was exposed to temperatures well below zero for hours.

Finally, he saw somebody riding by and he flagged him over. He explained that he didn't know anything about mechanics and politely asked the gentleman w...

The Birds and the Bees

A boy hears weird noises coming from his parent's bedroom at night. In the morning he asks them what the noise was about last night. His dad replies, "son, we were making cake". The next morning, the son comes downstairs and excitedly asks his parents if they were making cake last night. His dad rep...

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