You wouldn't think that a pastry frosting would pair well with magical trees
but it's actually enticing!
Licking the frosting
One day a little girl and her mother are riding in the car. The mother is driving past the park and the girl points out a couple under a blanket. The Girl asked her mother what the people under the blanket were doing so the mother replied “They are baking a cake”. Later that night the family is fl...
My sister made 44 cupcakes with an assortment of red, white, and blue frosting for an Independence Day dinner.
"Why 44?" I asked her. "Because that's the number of real presidents this country has actually had?"
(This actually just happened.)
A lady dies and goes to heaven.
When she gets there, she is confused to find everyone furiously cracking eggs, dumping flour, and mixing batter.
She turns around and sees an entire section dedicated to decoration, with elaborate concoctions of blueberries, frosting, and tiering at every station.
Finally, she sees som...
I came home to find my little brother putting cake frosting on his elbow.
When I asked him why he said, "I told mom that my elbow hurt and she asked me if I tried icing it".
I grew up in a pretty tough neighborhood. Kids use to cover me in chocolate and frosting and put cherries on my head.
Life was tough in the gateau.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
So there's a little girl at the zoo with her parents
The little girl see 2 monkeys fucking right so she asks her mom "What are they doing mommy? " the mom then says "They're baking a cake sweetheart "
Later on there way back home the little girl sees 2 dogs fucking she asks "What are they doing mommy?" Then the mom says " They are baking a cake...
Four Moles Are Burrowing Under A Bakery
As they get closer to the surface, the first mole in the line sniffs deeply and says, "Mmmmm, I smell cookies!"
They dig a big further, and the second mole raises his noise and says, "Wow, I smell cake!"
The dig goes on another few minutes, and the third mole finally smells something a...
Did you hear about the Kung Fu Baker?
If people tried to rob his bakery, he would beat the up and throw frosting at them yelling CAKE this!
A cake walked into a bar...
It was gonna try to find it's owner because it was celebrating his 50th birthday.
But when the people saw the cake they were very puzzled. What is this thing? (Seeing very well that it had legs and arms)
The cake replied, "I am a cake looking for someone named- ooh I don't remember b...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Look mom, I'm black!
A little boy sees his mom making a chocolate cake. While she's not looking, he paints his face black with the frosting. Happily, he says "Look Mom! I'm black!" The mom immediately whips his ass and says "Go show your father what you did!". The little boy walks to the living room and says "hey...look...
A mother comes down to the kitchen and finds her daughter up early, eating a bowl of cereal...
The daughter asks- “Mommy, I heard some strange sounds coming from your bedroom a little while ago. What were you and Daddy doing in there?”
The mother is instantly embarrassed.
“Um... your daddy and I were making a cake, sweetheart.”
The next morning the mom comes down and t...
Baking a Cake
A father and his son take a trip to the zoo. They are walking around to each exhibit and soon realise they came to the zoo in the middle of mating season.
The son was very young and every exhibit throughout the day he asked his dad the same question. "Dad what are those animals doing?" "Oh d...
I got arrested today
I got arrest today, apparently you aren't allowed to do doughnuts within 200ft of a school zone... the frosting worked as great lubricant though
A penguin talks his snowmobile in to get fixed.
The mechanic takes a look at it and says "looks like you blew a seal." penguin replies "no, that's just frosting on my lip."