My husband told me I could choose the name he'd paint on the back of his new boat with the condition it be nautical themed. So I named it...

For Sail.

I'm having an Avengers themed party this weekend, but due to COVID-19 restrictions...

...it's going to be a Loki affair.

Two crocodile themed cars were driving right behind eachother.

They were tailgators

I used to use a Halloween themed dating app

I left because I kept getting ghosted.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Theme parks are like losing your virginity.

You wait ages for a ride, and it’s over in 30 seconds. And you’re probably not the first one on the ride.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I set the pornhub theme as my ring tone, because if anyone at business meetings recognizes it they'll be too ashamed to comment.

They did stop shaking my hand though...

What do you call a hentai-themed band?

My tentacle romance.

I went to a Mary Poppins themed restaurant last night.

Super cauliflower cheese, but the lobster was atrocious!

I was hooking up with a girl when I asked to do Disney themed role-play

She agreed, so I gave her a blue fairy costume and I got into my most comfortable lederhosen

After a bit of foreplay, I undressed and asked her to grant my wish of being a real man

Looking down at me she said “Your wish may be granted because I can see quite plainly that you’ve been te...

3 men went to a theme park

and walked up to a ride that said "magic slide". The 1st man read the sign and went down the slide yelling "gold!" Landed in a pit of gold. 2nd man read the sign, went down the slide yelling "silver!" Landed in a pot of silver. The 3rd man didn't bother reading the sign and just went down the slide ...

I just bought my first oakwood theme laptop and I'm so excited.

I'm having trouble logging in though.

My friend successfully guessed the first present I'd got him for his Cuban themed party, but not the second present.

Clothes but no cigar.

Just A Man Shopping With His Wife

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to the local grocery store. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the follow...

I'm thinking of opening a racist-themed bakery...

...and I'm planning of naming it the " Cake Cake Cake".

I recently came up with a pirate-themed tabletop RPG, but then the makers of Dungeons and Dragons found out.

They sent me a seas-and-d6 letter.

Last October, I was walking through the cemetery.

I came across a trash can where someone had thrown out their Kraft Halloween monster themed mac and cheese...

It was the mac.

It was the monster mac.

the monster mac

was in the graveyard trash.



Thanks mom for this more obscure one

I want to make a lord of the rings themed metal band called

Nightmare on helms deep

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Old Joke

The year is 2120, and our story follows Joe McFlinch and his journey to overcome his inner demons. 'Who is Joe?', you may be wondering. Well, Joe is a cowardly 29 year old male. He has no special talents or skills, no hobbies, and most sadly, no friends. If I were to describe him as a dish, he would...

If a Birdie is one less than par, and an Eagle is two less than par, and an Albatross is three less than par…

…then, in keeping with an avian theme, why can’t a Hole-in-One be referred to as a Bay-Gull?

TL;DR-
A Bagel isn’t a Bagel unless there’s a Hole-in-One.

The theme of my companies team building retreat this year was mindfulness. They asked each one of us to give two examples of an open minded person. They said there were no wrong answers but,

If your answer is author Ernest Hemingway and singer Kurt Cobain it gets you a meeting with HR.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to hell...

A man dies and goes to the hell. As usual, he gets a tour from the devil to know, where he actually came to.

They visit a first room with many tables and people are playing all the card games in a big style.
The man asks, what is going on and the devil explains: "Those are people, who got ...

I want to start a all brass quartet with a lumber theme.

I’ll call it the tuba four.

Most Star Trek fans aren't big into poetry, so I knew that writing and publishing a book of Trek-themed poems would be risky but rewarding.

The project had its prose and Khans.

I played bass on the original Scooby Doo theme song way back in 1969 and then went on to play with Metallica. AMA!

Fine, I didn’t actually play the bass on the Scooby Doo theme song, or in any band for that matter, but I’d have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you metaling kids!

I was out shopping tonight, when I saw a new brand of condoms called, "Olympic." Trying to get in to the spirit of things, I bought a pack and when I got home, I sprinted in singing the Olympic theme song and proudly showed them to my wife...

"Olympic condoms!?" she asked. "What makes them so special? Are we only going to use them once every four years?!"

Chuckling, I replied, "No,no! You see, there are three colors, Gold, Silver and Bronze!"

"What color are you going to wear tonight?" she asked cheekily.

"Gold of co...

Two of my married (to each other) geeky friends enjoy couples-themed cosplay.

Every convention I see them in different outfits. One year it was Doctor McCoy and Nurse Chapel. The next they went as Luke and Leia. Then they went as the 4th Doctor and Sarah Jane Smith.

Well, the lady had a baby after that. The next time I saw them, He was dressed up as Number 6 Patr...

Anyone want to help start a new conspiracy theory themed cafeteria style restaurant?

We’ll call it “Queue A Nom Nom”

My friend has a vegetable-themed bakery

What a spud-muffin

I am thinking about opening a dungeons and dragons themed vacation rental...

I’m going to call it Air D&D

The wife and I went to a bank robber-themed fancy dress party last night.

Well I did. She stayed in the car, keeping the engine running.

What's the theme song of an Apple Store?

Return Of The Mac

Having a Jamaican hairstyle theme at work tommorow.

Im dreading it.

If An Anti-Vax Kid Had a Theme Song, What Would it Be?

The Final Countdown

Disney is updating a children's classic with a pandemic theme...

... it's called "The Never Ending Story"

My sister wanted a Cinderella themed party,

So I invited all her friends and made them clean my house.

Please enjoy my best ever Star Wars themed joke...

Irving was proud of his daughter Faith. She was the prettiest, smartest, most charming girl in all the Empire. And when Faith was asked to attend the Winter Gala by Conan Antonio, Irving was justifiably pleased, for Conan was a well-decorated and many-times-promoted military man of great respect....

My 10 year old Son just came up with this one and I couldn't be more proud: What's Batman's favourite fruit?

A Banananananananananananananananana

EDIT: Thank you everyone for the awards and kind words! Just to clarify:

* Yes, he does know the 60's batman theme. My partner loves campy batman so it was inevitable. [The Simpsons](https://youtu.be/TQepz5rsS6E?t=88) also made sure of that.
* Gi...

What did the Greek philosopher name his religious themed screen printing shop in France.

Sacre' T's

Why does the man decorate his house Christmas themed for Halloween?

To scare people who are claustrophobic

Did you hear about that kid that got overwhelmed and burst into tears when his parents threw him a huge Thor themed 6th birthday party?

He wanted something a little more Loki.

My wife and I are into role play. Today she said I could pick any song as a role play theme...

I hope her friend Eileen is as excited as I am.

TIFU by taking my girlfriend to a food themed costume orgy.

Obligatory didn't happen today, but a few weeks ago, me and my girlfriend decided to spice up our relationship by going to an orgy. A mutual friend of ours gave us the adress, and told us to wear costumes. I was broccoli, my girlfriend was a tomato.

When we arrived, the door was unlocked. Th...

I feel that Disney is taking the "Rainforest Cafe" theme a bit to seriously

I was just sitting there eating when they bulldozed half of the place down.

Ukraine has announced plans to open Chernobyl as a theme park.

They say ”Its just like Disneyland.” Except the 6-foot mouse is real.

Theme song

99 Anti-maskers on the street,

99 on the street,

they go protest

they're feeling free,

98 Anti-maskers on the street

Three friends are exploring an abandoned theme park when they come across a mysterious water slide.

At the top of the slide is a sign that reads ‘As you descend, shout out your wish and it shall be granted’.

The first friend goes down the slide and shouts ‘I WANT LOADS OF GOLD!’, and sure enough at the bottom he lands in a huge pool of gold coins.

The second friend, seeing this, goe...

Why do programmers choose dark theme most of the time...

.....light attracts bugs.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is a Halloween themed Fleshlight called?

A Jackoff-lantern.

I think the Rainforest Cafe takes the whole rainforest theme too far.

This one time I was sitting there eating my chicken tenders and they bulldozed 40% of the restaurant.

I went to the doctor because I’ve had the Pawn Stars theme stuck in my head for two weeks

He said he’d have to call in a buddy of his who was an expert on those sorts of things

(But seriously please help me I’m going insane)

I’ve started a Harry Potter themed food blog.

Fantastic Feasts and Where to Find Them

How do your organize a space-themed party?

You planet

How much of Reddit content is made up of recurring themes?

69%

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife, looking at herself in the mirror.

Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she’d like to have for her birthday.

“I’d like to be six again”, she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme par...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two guys are invited to a costume party, where the theme is ‘Come as an emotional state’.

They arrive at the party and ring the bell. The host comes out and sees they are completely naked, one with his dick inside a hollowed out pear, and the other with his dick dipped into a bowl of yellow goop.

“Oh my god! What are you supposed to be?” she asks.

The first guy replies “Wel...

I went to a Superman themed nightclub.

Everyone looked really fly...

but there was a massive queue for the cloakroom.

How does Pink Panther main theme song sounds like in Turkish?

Durum durum... durum... durum durum durum durum duruuuuum.... dududurum.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just bought a Jehovah Witness themed advent calendar,

behind every door someone tells you to fuck off

I'm thinking about starting up a neurodivergent, mermaid-themed parody band of AC/DC. It's gonna be called

OCD Sea

I'm starting a Christmas themed thrash band.

Thinking of calling it Sleigher.

I made a pot themed roller coaster

It’s called “The Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed”

What do you call a basic girl in potato themed lingerie

A Tator-Thot

I went to my retro themed grad party last year...

It was a stereotypical grad party themed around the days of old. Everyone wore old clothes and had classic American food. The music was old too


First was the "Twist", and only a few people were dancing on the floor

The next song was "Jump" and the majority of the people were jumpin...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man hosts a dress-up party, where the theme is you have to come dressed as a mood...

...on the night of the party, the man is at the front door greeting his guests and asking them what mood they were dressed as.

A couple of women arrived all dressed in green saying "we're green with envy".

A trio of men turned up dressed in red saying "we're red with rage".

More...

I've been invited to a fancy dress party at Arnold Schwarzenegger's house. The theme is classical composers.

I'll be Bach.

I went out last night to a theme party dressed as a chicken and I met a girl who was dressed as an egg. One thing led to another and a life long question was answered.............

It was the chicken.

Whats the bukkake theme song?

"Come together, right now
Over me"

I'm in a Medieval-themed metal band

We're called "Bards of Prey."

We're having a Brexit themed Christmas.

Everyone says what they want but nobody ends up getting it.

Did you hear about the pirate themed phone Apple have been designing?

They’re gonna call it the ayePhone

This guy said he was going to compose an atheist theme song ....

I suggested, "Don't START believing".

What do you call a Star Wars themed all you can eat restaurant?

Bo-buffet

So there was a 70's themed club playing 2000's music

When a man walked with a gun and fired a few rounds into the air, but nothing changed


Because there was already panic at the disco

What do you call a Black Panther themed condom?

A Wacondom.

How do you call a theme park of prehistoric proctologists?

-Your ass's sick Park.

My girlfriend wants a lumber themed breast tattoo

“Seems like it would be ugly, wooden tit?”

I threw a camouflage themed party last week.

No one showed up.

Victoria’s Secret is having a Janet Jackson themed sale for the Holidays

All bras are half off

There once was a farmer whose five quintuplet teenage daughters were going on dates at the same time.

"As soon as your dates arrive," said the farmer, "I will talk to them personally. If I don't like them, I will shoot them."

Just then, a knock was heard at the door. The farmer answered the door, shotgun in hand. "Who is this?"

"My name's Teddy," said the boy. "I'm going steady with Be...

Game of Thrones Themed: "Knock knock. Who's there? Arya"

"Knock knock. Who's there? Arya"

"Arya who?"

"Arya gonna let me in? Winter is comin'!"

I'm a new dad ...I think this whole dad joke thing is inevitable.

I just started a pirate themed band with my friends, but we're having trouble writing songs for it

All we seem to be able to write are the hooks

Why are Titanic themed parties so awkward?

They lack good icebreakers!

A pee themed pickup line

Normally you’re a 4 or 5, but damn girl, when you’re peeing, urinate

Did you hear about the new lawyer themed sushi restaurant that opened up the other day?

It's called Sosumi.

Sure it’s cool that swinger parties have an aptly themes musical selection

Pity that it got a little stale after the fifth round of ‘Last night a DJ shaved my wife”

The theme for this year’s Met Gala was Camp

The outfits were in-tents.

Which of these two jokes with roughly the same theme is better?

A. A Christian is drowning in the sea. A boat comes up the crew tries to save them, but he says "no, God will save me!" Later another boat comes up and tries to save him again, but he insists that God will save him. Later a third boat comes along. The Christian is wheezing, gasping, almost exhausted...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just got back from an r/jokes themed party.

It was terrible. Almost everyone was a twin or a triplet so it felt like I kept bumping into the same people over and over, and whenever somebody knocked on the door everyone just asked who it was rather than actually answering it. To top it off, when after waiting 45 minutes I finally got to the f...

An Australian person went to a chess themed restaurant.

After finishing his meal, he asked the server, “could I get my check mate?”

I got a Jehovah's Witness themed advent calender this year....

I didn't open any of the doors.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tried out a horror themed Grindr app the other night...

It gave me the willies.

If you put reddit's theme to "Night",

r/darkjokes will look empty

There was a huge uproar when the official theme song of the National Leukemia Foundation was announced

What's wrong with "Bad to the Bone"?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Juliana throws a theme party with guests told to come dressed as a feeling or emotion ...

Vinny shows up with his face covered with question marks the size of zits.

“And yous supposed to be what?” Juliana asks.

“Imma riddled with doubt,” Vinny grins, and he’s welcomed in.

Two hours later, the last guests, Tony and Joe, turn up completely naked except for a pear and a...

I was at a Lord Of The Rings themed disco last night.

It was Mordor on the dance-floor.

The BBC are setting up a theme park and asked the public what BBC show concept they would most like to ride. The number one survey response was simply...

"Benedict Cumberbatch."

Dolph Lundgren, Jason Statham and Arnold Schwarzenegger go to a theme party.

Dolph Lundgren, Jason Statham, and Arnold Schwarzenegger are planning ahead to attend a theme party. The theme is famous composers, and Lundgren suggests “We should all go as a composer from our respective heritage. I could be Franz Berwald. He had interests in the arts and sciences, much like me.”<...

One of the big themes in Sartre's philosophy is the idea of genuine choice versus just the appearance of having a choice.

So he can't meaningfully choose to have his coffee with no cream, because he could never have had it with cream to begin with, but he can meaningfully choose to have it with no milk.

I heard Dave Grohl is making a new misogynistic otaku themed band

They're called the Wai-Foo Fighters

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I had an odd hunch that my brother would watch horror-themed clown porn in the park. So i bought a pair of binoculars with a 5280 feet capability, and used them to view his usual bench from afar. When he finally sat down and pulled out his phone, my suspicions were confirmed

I saw It cumming from a mile away

A group of lads go out for a night and then go to a cowboy themed bar.

When they go in they see that the bar has installed a spinning bull. They all have a go and the bull spins them around and they all fall off within 30 seconds.Up steps paddy and he jumps on the bull and he stays on for 10 minutes before falling off . The rest of the lads ask how he managed to stay o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Boris Johnson dies...

His soul arrives in heaven and he is met by St.Peter at the Pearly Gates. Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there's a problem: We seldom see a Conservative here and we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in; I'm a believer," says Johnso...

Q: What is the scariest Halloween decoration theme for 2018?







A: Saudi Arabian consulate

Why did the tomato blush? (I need other food grocery themed jokes too please!)

Because he saw the salad dressing! I am a cashier at a grocery store and need new food themed jokes! Please and thank you so much!!! I love you reddit fam happy new year!

What do you call a math-themed event organized by Casey Neistat?

A vlogarithmic function

Some celebrity’s have their own theme songs

Like Ellen with I’m coming out, or Bill Cosby with I wanna be sedated

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