What is Santa’s favorite Christmas Song?

What is Santa’s favorite Christmas Song?

Area Codes by Ludacris

What is Jesus' favourite song?

Highway to the Manger Zone

My daughter made this tonight: What's the favourite song of sloths?

Don't Hurry, Be Happy

I really really want to perform a song for you.

It would be the "I sing on my cake" day.

I wrote a song about a tortilla...

Well actually it was more of a wrap

My girlfriend told me she hates songs by Britney Spears and she doesn't want me to sing them.

But oops, I did it again.

What does god call one verse of his song?

A universe

My wife says she is going to kick me out if I keep singing anymore Christmas songs..

..I said, 'but baby, it's cold outside'

My friend composes songs about sewing machines.

He’s a Singer songwriter or sew it seams. (Don’t hate me.) Edit: corrected word.

Eminem is collaborating on a new song with Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion

Wap God

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This new Cardi B song sure is getting a lot of press.

I haven’t listened to it yet, but when I do I sure hope I find out what an Ass pussy is.

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Michael Phelps has began covering Eminem songs!

My favorite song from his new album is the Real Swim Shady.

What's Mrs.Claus's favourite Christmas song?

Here comes Santa Claus, Here comes Santa Claus, right down Santa Claus lane!

What kind of bird always forgets the words of a song?

A

.

.

.

Hummingbird

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It’s been alleged that I’ve written a series of tweets about the song “I’m Too Sexy”.

I’d like to reassure my followers that I did not write said thread...

Wanna hear a song about Covid-19?

It's pretty catchy.

Have you heard the Norse Christmas song?

Vahalalalalala

What song was playing as the bee left the bar?

Don’t Stop Believin’

I went around asking people if they knew who made the song Roundabout

It was a Yes or no question.

I’ll never understand how the song Free Bird became a meme amongst musicians

Anyway here’s wonderwall

Which Stevie Wonder song is known for its use of jazz Chords?

I Jazz Chord To Say I Love You..

What Beatles song charted highest in Italy?

Penne Lane

I forgot how much I hated Nickelback until you blasted their song on the radio...

And this is how you remind me?!!!

Why don't Elton John songs have a copyright?

You can tell everybody this is your song.

A new guy starts work at a bakery.

He's handed his rota and his eyes lighten up: "Great, it's dinner-roll day!". The supervisor is puzzled to see such enthusiasm for so mundane a task as baking dinner rolls, but sure enough, the new guy goes to it with zest and panache and is soon turning out dinner rolls the like of which the superv...

What's the theme song of an Apple Store?

Return Of The Mac

Around this time of the year, I start carrying around a stone with me to throw at people who are singing Christmas songs already.

It’s my jingle bell rock.

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What should be the last lyric of Cardi B’s song “Wet Ass Pussy”?

The Aristocrats

Sometimes I have such a hard time remembering my favorite Celine Dion song

..but it's all coming back to me now.

I played bass on the original Scooby Doo theme song way back in 1969 and then went on to play with Metallica. AMA!

Fine, I didn’t actually play the bass on the Scooby Doo theme song, or in any band for that matter, but I’d have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you metaling kids!

What is Jeffrey Toobin favorite hip hop song?

Rump Shaker : "All I want to do is zoom zoom and poom poom".

A woman on her bike was riding through the countryside during the middle ages, playing her guitar and singing songs....

...when she came upon a dashing knight in the woods, practicing his swordsmanship. The knight was struck by her beauty and started a conversation. which quickly turned into flirting.

The knight straddled the front wheel of her bike and started to passionately kiss her. The woman said "No we ...

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Every time I see someone posting lyrics of inspirational songs on social media, I get really pissed off.

But I will survive.

Which 80's song chorus can help you try to escape Jigsaw?

Everybody cut foot loose!

What is Dwight Schrutes favourite Michael Jackson song?

Beet it.

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An American spy comes into a Soviet bar

And orders a drink.

"No drink for US spies" said the barkeep.

The spy goes pale. He pulls out a bottle of Vodka and drains it in one big gulp.

"You drink like Russian, but you are American spy"

The spy pulls out his accordeon and plays a wonderful Russian folk song, every...

What’s a Californian’s favorite song?

We didn’t start the fire. Ps. It’s a boy!

What is a New Zealanders favourite love song?

I cant help falling in love with ewe..

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Why didn't Joe Exotic ever release any Christmas songs?

Because he fucking hates Carols.

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A Man is holding auditions for a pianist and in comes the last one..

He comes in and starts the play the most beautiful song the man has ever heard. The song is so beautiful the man starts crying and ask, “What is the name of that song?”

The pianist then says “Oh, this song right here? It’s called my bone in your ass.”

The man then takes a moment and g...

Putin and Obama meet in Moscow

They're debating the merits fo their respective societies. They argue about moral values and which country is doing better.

Obama: I've heard that all Russian are alcoholics.

Putin: That's a Russophobic myth. I bet there's not a single drunk out in Moscow tonight.

Obama: I don'...

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An Englishman, an American and a Japanese guy are on a boat, moments away from plunging over a waterfall to their doom...

Suddenly a genie appears. The genie explains that he is of limited power. He cannot prevent their inevitable deaths, but he can grant each man one wish before he dies.

The American steps up first. 'I love my country. Before I die I want to sing my national anthem one last time. The full versi...

I love how Pit Bull announces himself at the beginning of every song

giving us time to change the song.

What do you call a Rick Astley song that makes it to the front page?

A rick r/all

What’s that song again?

I can’t seem to remember the name of that song. 10 % luck 20 % skill 15 % concentrated power of will? Something ?

I don’t know any songs about rich countries..

I can only *Singapore* one.

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Why did Lil Wayne never release the song "delegate"

shit was so fire, everyone would've realised it was the work of ghost writers

What’s Karen’s favorite song

Mask off by future




Edit : THANK YOU FOR MY FIRST EVER GOLD!

A miner moves out west to California...

A miner moves out west to California. Having spent a few years in Colorado, he has a pretty good idea of the sort of lifestyle miner's live; up from dawn 'til dusk in the mines, and then up from dusk 'til dawn drinking and playing card games.

So, to his surprise, when he moves to Bluster's Bl...

(UK reference) Whats' an aircraft mechanic's favourite Oasis song?

Don't Look Back in Hangar.

My girlfriend left me cause I couldn’t stop quoting linkin park songs

But in the end, it doesn’t even matter

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A drunk stumbles into an upscale bar on a slow night.

A drunk stumbles into an upscale bar on a slow night. He asks the bartender for a drink and says, “I can’t pay you, but I’ll play you a song on that piano.” The bartender says what the hell and gives the man a shot of cheap whiskey. To his surprise, the drunk sits down at the piano and plays one of ...

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A dictator once asked a famous composer if he could write him a brilliant piece of music.

Naturally, the composer was extremely nervous, as the dictator had a habit of giving the death penalty to those who did not please him.

The composer spent weeks working on this piece, and from a musical standpoint it was quite good. So, he gathered his orchestra and performed his piece for th...

I thought I heard an onion singing a Bee Gees song.

But it turned out it was just a chive talking.

What’s Princess Leia’s favourite song?

Riding solo - Jason Derulo

I've just joined a rock band that play the same songs in the same order at every gig.

We're OC/DC

I just read a story about songs in history and the pitches in which they were sung.

For example, a march to battle was sung around middle D. Gregorian chants were sung from low D to middle G.

It seems that most, if not all, pirate shanties were sung on the high C’s.

Did you hear about The Beatles song used to get people to wash their hands?

Na na na na na na na na na na na Hi Jean

Why don't hummingbirds sing songs?



Because they don't know the words.

There was an old woman listening to the radio when she heard a song called “Two Lips and Seven Kisses.” She decided to call the radio station to get the name of the record company. In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and she asks, “Do you have “Two Lips and Seven Kisses?”

The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, “No, but I have two nuts and seven inches!”

So the woman asked, “Is that a record?”

To which the man replied, “No, its average!”

The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats

and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Brits have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome"...

What is the most played song from any Karen as of right now?

Mask Off.

Theme song

99 Anti-maskers on the street,

99 on the street,

they go protest

they're feeling free,

98 Anti-maskers on the street

A man dies and goes to heaven

Because he always helped everyone St.Peter says he could have his afterlife wherever he wants.
First they go to the place where the people are who had been neither bad nor good. They watch movies and eat sweets.
After that they go to hell. Here the people are having a lot of fun. Famous musici...

One of life's most soul crushing moments occurs every time that a song comes on the radio .....

And you think you are about to hear Under Pressure by Queen only to find out it's Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice.

Meatloaf has produced 3 really great songs but of them, I can only recognise Bat out of Hell and Heaven can wait.

Well 2 out of 3 ain’t bad

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Pierre, a French pilot of WW1 took leave in Paris and went out to sample the nightlife. He has a great night of song and wine and he meets a young lady, who he invites back to his apartment.

The excited pair walk back through the tree lined boulevards and on the way, Pierre drops in to a shop to purchase a bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, a bottle of brandy and a box of matches.

When they reach the apartment they waste no time in stripping off and fall passionately ont...

A small time musician dies and goes to Heaven

He is met at the Gates of Heaven by St Peter.

"Welcome, my son. Let me show you around."

St Peter arrives at a door, and opens it.
Inside is Eddy Van Halen, playing the guitar.

"Wow!!" Says the man. "I'm a huge fan!"

St Peter continues on, and stops at the next door....

My friends make fun of me for only being able to play one Metallica song on guitar

It's Sad But True

What is Trump's favorite song?

What does the Fox say?

What do you get when you play a country song backwards?

You get your house back, your wife back, your dog back and your truck back.

ABBA songs Ramadan edition

Gimme gimme gimme a naan after midnight

I just found out the man who wrote the song The Hokey Pokey passed away

When they put him in his coffin, they put the left leg in, they took the left leg out...

Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers

The first boy says, “My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.”

The second boy says, “That’s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100.”

The third boy says, “I got you both beat. My Dad...

There is a timeline where Rick doesn’t make Rick Roll

He tried to write a song, but instead he gave up. He let himself down. He ran away and deserted the idea. He cried, he said goodbye, he even lied to and hurt himself.

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A teenage girl came across an old man sitting next to his radio, tapping his cane in time to a Lil Wayne song.

"Holy crap! I didn't know you'd like rap music?!"
"I didn't, either," the old man replied. "It all started after my hip op".

No one is allowed to congregate for funerals; instead, people drive by the cemetery and honk their horns in respect. One man drives by blasting “Another One Bites The Dust”

The family wanted to be mad, but then another car drove by playing the same song, and another one does, and another one does, and another one drives a bus.

Just a regular day in the Pope's life

This beautiful morning, the Pope woke early, excited for today's ceremony. It was a special day, and the Vatican will probably be even more crowded than usual. Standing there on the balcony and speaking to such a great audience is the purest joy of the Pope, second only to his closeness to God.
<...

What Christmas song do they sing in the psychiatric hospital?

Do you see what I see?

What song does the queen of England sing when she takes her clothes off?

London's Britches Falling Down

With the rise of self driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time...

Until there's a country song where the guy's truck leaves him.

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They say about 70% of people masturbate in the shower and about 30% sing in the shower. Do you know what the most popular song is to sing in the shower?

You don't? Well I guess we know what you've been doing.

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The song "Earth" by Lil Dicky features musical cameos from dozens of popular singers.

The song was released around Earth Day and promotes the idea that everyone should work together to be green and eco-friendly and save the planet.

Many famous singers had cameos in the song as different animals or other forms of wildlife. Perhaps the most notable cameo was the singer that sang...

Remember the song “Blue” by Eiffel 65?

You do now.

Enjoy having that in your head for the rest of the day.

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My dad does this really inappropriate joke where he closes his eyes whenever a Stevie Wonder song comes on.

Fucking nightmare when his songs are on the car radio.

Clothes are like Billie Eilish songs

I was really surprised when I found out that a kid made them

21 Pilots

In 2016 during their tour,
21 Pilots performed in Brighton, Australia.
.
For that particular show,
For the entire show they sang their yet to be released songs.


Audience were enjoying at the beginning, by 1 hour mark they were demanding their hits to be performed.


...

Why does DJ Khaled shout his name at the beginning of the songs he produces?

So you know that it's time to change the channel.

Whats the favourite Song of flying Bugs?

Pretty Fly (for a White Guy)

Once upon a time, in a magical fantasy kingdom, there lived a young monk named Sam.

His order was renowned for their beautiful choral singing. They trained, hours every day, refining their voices and their art. Their song floated down the mountainside, enriching the lives and souls of the townspeople below.

Sam was particularly gifted, and on his 19th birthday, in mid-song, ...

My friends are constantly asking me to stop signing Oasis songs.

I said maybe.

Vera Lynn used to work at an Arctic research station. She wrote a protest song about the lack of variety in the staff canteen.

Whale meat again?

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An Irishman stops at an airport in England...

An Irishman stops at an airport in England. While he's waiting for his flight to arrive, he decides to make a quick stop at the airport bar.

As it's late at night, there's only the bartender and two other people there. Always willing to make a new friend, he sits down with the two and starts ...

Being in quarantine I’ve gotten bored and wrote a song on cats.

The third verse ran away, I guess next time I’ll use paper.

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