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What was the name of Hitler's rap album?

Straight Outta Kampfton

I once got in a rap battle with a peanut.

He was roasted.

R Kelly is really changing the rap game

He takes the art out of rap artist

Macaulay Culkin just released his first rap album.

He's Ho Malone.

Why don’t religious people like rap music?

All rappers do is hop in the booth and confess to a bunch of crimes they’ve committed.

That’s Catholicism.

I recently wrote a song about Tortillas...

Actually its more of a rap.

Did you hear about the female rapper who only rapped when she was on her menstrual cycle?

I heard she has a mean flow

There really should be a subgenre of hip-hop called Bubble Rap

It would probably sound a lot like pop.

Don’t know why used car salesmen get such a bad rap.

Mine knocked 20 bucks off the muffler tax just because he liked my face!

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If Korean Pop is Kpop and Chinese Rap is Crap,

Then French Art must be..

Few years ago I saw Slim Shady in concert and instead of rapping he just kept pulling his pants down and mooning the crowd.

Honestly the whole thing was just Em bare assing.

How do you beat a diabetic rapper in a rap battle

Candy Bars

What do mumble rappers from the East coast rap about?

I don’t know...Their verses aren’t Pacific.

What mumble rap group was also famous for their singing?

The Do-Re-Migos

If steak could rap, why would its prefix only be Big or Lil'?

Because medium rare

What kind of snake is best at Rap?

The Spittin' Cobra

What music genre do rap-loving Republican listen to?

Hip-hocrisy

What do you call a fish who raps?

A. Swim Shady

If a Cheetah made a rap group, what would it be called?

...Rapid.

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A US Navy cruiser anchored in Mississippi for a week's shore leave. The first evening, the ship's Captain received the following note from the wife of a very wealthy and influential plantation owner:

"Dear Captain, Thursday will be my daughter's Debutante Ball. I would like you to send four well-mannered, handsome, unmarried officers in their formal dress uniforms to attend the dance. They should arrive promptly at 8:00 PM prepared for an evening of polite Southern conversation. They should be e...

If I were a rapper, my rap name would be..

Lay-Z

What is it called when a rapper raps about pubs?

Spitting bars

Why did the orange have so much trouble forming a rap duo?

No one rhymes with orange.

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My rap album never made big-bucks

Cause of the diss-counts

Did you hear about the singer who combines country music with rap?

His name is Hot Diggity Dogg

What do you call it when you're scheduled for a rap battle, but your opponent just isn't as good as you hoped for?

A diss appointment.

I'm working on a rap song about Drugs and Money

It's called "I can't afford that insulin"

What do you call a Call of Duty player's instant rap single?

A Flash-Banger

Eminem is that guy in chemistry class that raps the whole periodic table.

But skips Oxygen.

What's the difference between raping and rapping?

Where you put the pp.

Did you hear about that rap group that got arrested?

Apparently they've been charged with conspiracy to commit rhyme.

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What's the difference between raping and rapping?

One's mostly done by criminals in shady neighborhoods, and the other is sex without consent.

So Tekashi69 could face life in prison

Which is nice because we might finally get to see a mumble rapper completing a sentence

My grandpa and Eminem rapping have 1 thing in common

They don't breathe

What’s the coronavirus’ favourite rap group ?

The Wuhan Clan

What's the difference between Bill Cosby and a rap artist

art

An older man with a touch of dementia wobbles into a Catholic Church, sits down in the confessional booth, but doesn't utter a word. The Priest coughs, hoping to get a response. But the older man just sits and says nothing. Finally the Priest raps his knuckles three times on the screen.

The older guy mumbles, "Don't bother knocking, pal. There's no paper over here either.”

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Kanye’s rise to fame

Right before dropping out of college and kick starting his rap career, Kanye West went to visit his wealthy aunt, Shirlie Faulker, who owned a rubber products manufacturing factory on the outskirts of Paris, France. He decided to spend his summer break working at the factory part time while deciding...

What’s different about rap battles and American schools?

People usually don’t cry at rap battles when there’s shots fired.

I made a rap song all about soap.

It’s fine, the lyrics are clean.

What do you call a rap battle between 21 savage and Six-Nine?

Alien vs predator

What’s a rap video and a good reddit post got in common?

Lots of cake.

It’s not fair that procrastination gets such a bad rap.

It has literally kept me alive for years.

So singing some rap songs with my black friends in the car and they are picking on me because as a white guy I am not allowed to say the n word when it pops up in the songs.

But jokes on them, I can say a lot of other words that they can’t.
Like “thank you officer have a nice day.”
And also “happy birthday uncle dad”

The Dean of the College of the Cardinals was at his wits end

The conclave had been contentious, and no clear leader emerged after many days of bickering. He needed a break, and was resting in his private office when there was a gentle rap at the door.

"What is it? Is there word of a new Pope?"

"Not exactly, sir."

"Who is it that disturbs...

If I can't focus on my work because someone is rapping about me

then I've been diss track-ted

I do not understand why Amazon gets a bad rap for the whole homeless issue...

I mean yes Apple/Google/Microsoft are donating a lot of money to help, but Amazon employs more homeless people than all three combined!

My dad needed some advice on how to wrap birthday presents properly

He looked up "Enimem-rap god"

There are two eras of modern rap...

Pre Malone and Post Malone

I was going to make a joke about mumble rap

But you wouldn’t understand it.

Rap is like scissors...

It always loses to rock.

I listen to way too much rap music.

I’m up to 2pac a day.

I've just met a woman who raps about equality for women

I've just met a woman who raps about equality for women everywhere.

She's called 'Feminem'

I dont know why dad jokes get a bad rap, women love dad jokes.

Otherwise they'd call them bachelor jokes.

What do you call a girl that raps about women rights?

Feminem.

I've been trying to sell a rap themed shirt with the greatest disses of all time on it, but apparently it's not selling well.

I'll have to up the discount.

I always listen to mumble rap when I’m studying.

It’s a constant reminder on why it is important to get educated.

My SO is kicking me out the house because apparently I’m obsessed with rap.

She told me 2pac my bags and leave.

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I have finally figured out the perfect name for the Country/Rap genre

CRap

Why aren't there any rap songs about Donald Trump?

Because there aren't any words that rhyme with "Orange."

If you're ever struggling to remember the spelling...

Santa wraps, Eminem raps, Brock Turner...

What does a warlock farmer rap about?

Witches and hoes.

If North Korea ever made propaganda rap, it would be K-RAP

The name is self-explanatory

Help! I think I broke my phone's speaker! All I did was convert my normal rap playlist into an emo rap playlist.

Now all I can hear is a Lil Peep.

What do you call a rapping DEA agent?

Narky Nark

I tried buying tickets to a rap concert to see if the bank had processed the loan I requested on my account

They did not Post Malone.

I never knew rap had 4 letters...

They should have kept the silent c on the front.

One of Roald Dahl's characters gained weight and started writing rap music.

Notorious BFG.

Why are dragons so good at rapping?

Because they're always spitting fire.

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If Korean Pop is KPop

Is Chinese Rap Crap?

EDIT: I just got on and looked at this post.....
THANK U SO MUCH!!!! This was my first post and it got all the way to the top!! Thank you sooo much!!

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My son likes rap music, but he's only 7 so when he asks what certain words mean, I lie....

for example, when rappers talk about "weed" they're just talking about the weeds in their grass... and when they "smoke weed" that just means they're killing the weeds in their lawn...


his favorite line is "HEY HEY HEY HEY... Smoke Weed Everyday".... I had to explain to him that it's by...

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The cross-eyed mule

A farmer, extremely proud of his mule, often boasted that it could haul anything no matter the weight. As such, he constantly took the largest jobs and charged a hefty price for it.

One day in town he loaded up his largest job yet in his wagon. He hitched up the mule, gave it a switch, and th...

If the rap god and rap devil are fighting?

Does that mean we all missed the rapture?

Did you hear why they are naming Trampolines after a famous 90's rap duo?

Because Kriss Kross will make you jump jump

GF: "Did you see Eminem's new rap about Trump?"

Me: "Yes. It was ludacris."

GF: "No, it was Eminem."

Gang bangs always get a bad rap on the news...

People fail to realize that 9/10 people enjoy them. The numbers don’t lie.

Future rap name: 50 Bitcoin

That's all, the punchline was in the title; however, this sentence is here to comfort you and let you know that it's totally normal that you clicked to see if there was anything else.

Apparently, someone stole a few of my Rap CDs.

Oh well, no biggie.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.

"You know, music can really take you places," he muses to the bartender. "For example, if you guys play one more rap song in here it's going to take me to the next bar."

In and Out and Whataburger should have a rap battle

Because they have real beef.

A blonde man is driving down the road when he sees another blonde guy sitting in a rowboat in the middle of a field. He pulls over and yells "its guys like you that give us blondes a bad rap!

And you're lucky I can't swim or I'd come out there and kick your ass!"

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My father must think I’m good at rapping

He calls me Lil Bitch.

Being white has its disadvantages too, you know.

It can be super hard to find a rap song on iTunes when you spell all the words correctly.

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I'm going to open a strip club where the dancers rap.

And call it titty bars

11 Minutes

A cop was patrolling late at night in a well-known lover’s spot, famous for all obscene activities. He sees a couple in a car, with the interior light brightly glowing.

The cop carefully approaches the car to get a closer look.
Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer ...

Why did the pre-pubescent dragon lose the rap battle?

He couldn't yet spit hot fire

So batman's son got into the rap industry

.. They call him Lil' Wayne

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What did the rapping cow say to the chicken crossing the road?

Moooove bitch, get out the way
Get out the way bitch, get out the way

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With the surge in popularity of Country Music artists that have included rap in their songs, like Jason Aldean and Sam Hunt, this years CMA's will include a new category. As it is a hybrid style of genres, Rap and Country, the producers have settled on a fitting name for the award.

CRAP.

I plan on starting a geek rap band...

I think I'll call it Run-D.L.L.

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