Pink Jokes - 52 Hilarious Pink Jokes

Pink, pink and more pink

A man’s car breaks down across the street from a pink pink house. He walks up to the pink pink house with the pink pink door, up the pink pink stoop. He rings the pink pink doorbell next to the pink pink door and the pink pink lady answers. The man says “my car broke down, can I stay the night?”
...

I bought pink cotton but my wife wanted purple

Sorry, wrong thread

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I dated a twin once. People always asked me how I could tell them apart. It was simple. Ashley painted her nails pink

And Michael had a Penis.

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Pink kryptonite turns Superman gay. What does Thor use?

The Bi-frost.

My 14 year old just came in and told me this one, said he made it up himself. I was impressed.

The American education system obviously listen to Pink Floyd.

They've left those kids a loan.

EDIT: Woke up to find THIS :O

What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on a bug?

Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant dead ant dead ant dead ant dead ant.

What’s the difference between pink and purple?

Grip strength.

Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin agreed to take care of each other’s gardens.

This means Roger Waters Robert’s Plants.

Girl, our relationship is like a Himalayan pink salt lamp…

I don’t think it’s working, and I feel nothing.

Pink Panther's TODO list

1. TODO
2. TODO
3. TODO TODO TODO TODO TODOOO

What's Cookie Monster's favourite Pink Floyd song?

Comfortably Nom nom nom nom.

What is grey and pink,grey and pink?

2 elephants hiding in a strawberry patch

I bought the 250 million year old pink Himalayan salt

Behind the package, on the label, it says that it expires in December 2022

What do you get if you paint a pink pig mint-green?

A pigmint of your imagination.

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Pink ping pong balls

Once upon a time there was a father and a son. It was the son’s tenth birthday and his father said,

“Son, you are the most precious thing in the world to me. Whatever you ask for your birthday, you shall receive.”

His son replied,

“Dad, all I want for my birthday is a pink ping ...

As a Pink Floyd fan, nothing makes me angrier than seeing a vegan eating pudding.

Because how can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?

What do the colors green, pink, and yellow have in common with a phone?

The phone rings green....green.....green, so you pink it up and say yellow.

What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?

Their last big hit was the wall.

A guy adopts a pink parrot from an old sailor....

unfortunately, it swears like an old sailor. He tries everything to get it to stop. He even destroyed the parrot's old cage, but that just made it worse. Then he noticed his mom coming up to the house. What could he do? He couldn't let his dear sweet mother hear this foul mouthed bird. So, he p...

What do you call a guy with a pink shirt, pink shoes,and a pink 40 caliber?

Sir.

When I get stoned I like to listen to Pink Floyd & eat a lot.

I have become comfortably plump.

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Ink for Pink

For a women to flash her boobs at the tattoo artist for a free inking considered tits-for-tats ?

Green,pink and yellow

A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senor, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!" The Border Patrol Ag...

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A black man, a blue man, a green man, a pink man, a red man and yellow man walk into a bar...

The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind in here. Too much Risk."

Whats pink and fluffy?

Pink fluff. Whats blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

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Eating a pink starburst is a lot like masturbating...

You want to savor it for as long as you can, but once you bite into it you have to finish.

My 3 year old daughter as a pink fairy princes

To my wife: “I’ll make you a queen!”
To me: “I’ll make you a cookie monster!”

If a pink stork delivers girl babies and a blue stork delivers boy babies, what delivers no babies?

A swallow.

What do Donald Trump, Pink Floyd, and Dale Earnhardt Sr have in common?

Their biggest hits were all "The Wall"

A pink elephant walks into a bar

The barman looks at him and says

“You’re too early mate, he’s not in yet”

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Two Vaginas were talking and the first one said: “Did you hear that asshole? He said ‘two in the pink and one in the stink’ is favoritism”, and the other one replied:

“They hate us cuz they anus”

Many women object to the restaurant named ‘The Pink Taco’

Personally I would prefer “The Bearded Clam.”

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An elderly Man goes to the Doctor.

Man:"Doctor i need help, recebtly i got a new Girlfriend, 26 years old and im pretty much impotent can you help me?"

Doctor:"I have the right thing for you, please drop your pants."

The Man drops his Pants and the Doctor puts a syringe in his Penis, containing a blue liquid.

The...

I bought my girlfriend a pink vibrator for valentines day.

She told me as long as she has me she won't need it. I told her "actually that's what I'm here to talk about"

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Green, pink and purple polka-dot ping pong balls

So, a few years ago, I met the owner of a multimillion dollar company, and he decided to tell me a very strange story.

The man told me that he had a son, for whom he cared about deeply, so much so that for his 15th birthday, he offered him anything he wanted in the world.

In response, ...

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My wife keeps asking why I drink a pink liquid whenever my stomach is upset.

Frankly, it's not her bismuth.

What is pink , goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet ?

Bubble gum.

If you start the Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd and the passion of the Christ at the same time the scenes don’t match up at all

It turns out Jesus was more of a nine inch nails guy

How do you kill a blue elephant? You shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant?

You hold its trunk until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

An older joke but a good one- A frog goes into the bank…

and hops up to a teller. He can see from her name plate that she is called Patricia Whack,
so he says "Ms. Whack, I'd like to borrow $30,000, please."
The teller asks for his name and the frog replies that he is Kermit Jagger, son of Mick Jagger, and a personal friend of the bank manager. Unc...

Mr Green lives in The Green House. Mr Blue lives in The Blue House. Mrs Pink lives in The Pink House. Who lives in The White House?

Mr Orange.

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There’s a painting in a museum of 3 naked black men sitting on a bench, but the man in the middle has a pink penis.

The artist behind the painting is unknown, and no one really knows why the man in the middle has a pink penis. The curator has a story about how pink represents equality at birth, however the true reason was unknown. One day there was a couple touring the museum, and they spent quite a bit of time e...

What’s pink, round, and spits approximately 3.1415926589 pastry tins at an incredibly fast speed?

Kirby after winning the Pi eating contest.

I really like that French song about the pink airplane.

L’avion Rose

Roses are red, the sky is pink

This water tastes funny
Nice to meet you I live in flint

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What’s pink and sits on the bottom of the ocean

Moby’s dick

My mom told this to me when I was maybe 10

Why do we dress baby boys in blue and baby girls in pink?

Because they can't dress themselves.

What's pink and wrinkly and hangs out Grandpa's pyjamas?

Grandma.

Whats big, pink, long and my girlfriend hates when I put it in her mouth?

Our miscarriage.

It's big, pink and hard first thing in the morning, and sometimes I get my wife to help me with it.

Anybody else like the *Financial Times* crossword?

The pink, plastic birds that are popular lawn ornaments in Florida.....

are they called, "Placebo Flamingos"?

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A black man walks into a restaurant..

There is a huge sign on wall that says "Colored People Not Allowed."

The man takes a seat and a white man comes over in a hurry and says, " Excuse me son, we don't serve colored people in this restaurant. Im going to have to ask you to leave."

The black man smiles, looks at the white m...

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