Disco Jokes

Walking across the hall to get a drink. One of my classmates came up to me and said ‘dude, your shoes are on smoking hot!’

I gave them a smile and kept walking to get a drink. Another classmate then approached me and said ‘hey bro, you’re on fire tonight!’

I gave them a wink and some ... read more

"Get down!"

“See that guy on the dance floor? 25 years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down.”

The husband replies, “It looks like he’s still celebrating.”

Because he was killing the dance floor.

One day, a father gets out of work and on his way home he remembers it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a toy store and asks the salesperson, "How much is the Barbie on display in the front window?" The salesperson answers, "Which one? We have Work-Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie f... read more

Shakespeare writes Tragedies not Sins.

Russian at the disco. A pretty girl at the bar next to him. After a while, a Turk comes up to the bar and says: - "You're hitting on my girlfriend. In a moment I see you outside and we'll handle it like men. A Russian comes out in front of the disco, looks at 50 Turks with knives in their hands. Aft... read more

She said, “Yes”, so I said, “Great, can I have your chair?”

I danced like nobody was watching.

We call ourselves... The Pillage People.

It was Mordor on the dance floor.

He uses all 4 at different times of the year, and each one is based on 1 of 4 different musical genres.

In spring he uses the jazz tent, in summer he uses the pop tent, in autumn he uses the classical tent….

But now is the winter of our disco tent.

A Cluster Funk.

I got a complaint from the mime next door.

We're called Hispanic at the Disco

Because now is the winter of my disco tent.

They know its a fever you cant sweat out

It was Mordor on the dance-floor.

A man walks up to a woman and asks: "Would you like to dance?"

Woman: "Yes, i would like that very much."

Man: "Ok, go dancing then. Meanwhile i will chat with your friend."

He had no body to go with

They’re teaching people to follow a single path when really, you can panic anywhere.

So I tried to find it.

I saw it on the dancefloor, being stood on by a guy. That's when I noticed that he was trying to grope her and she obviously wasn't enjoying it.

I walked up to him, tapped him on the back and delivered a swift kick to his balls. He fell over, moaning in pain.
... read more

The DJ said, "Sing with me". I sang with him.
The DJ said, "Put your hands together". I put my hands together while singing along.

The DJ said, "Come on everyone". I was thrown out of the Disco.

Two close friends, Sam Frank and Frank Sam, pass away on the same day. Frank Sam, having led a good life, went to heaven and played a harp in the celestial choir. Sam Frank, having led a somewhat less noble life, wound up in hell running a disco. Frank Sam really missed his old friend and asked perm... read more

Larry and Sam did so much together, that they even died together.

Larry went to Heaven and Sam went to Hell.

Larry was doing well in Heaven and one day St. Peter came up to him and said, "Larry, you know you are the nicest clam we ever had up here. Everyone likes you, but you seem to b... read more

A foam party!

The place was heaving!

They all left their instruments at the concert hall, except for Connie, who always insists on bringing her harp wherever she goes. They started out at a hip dance club called "Sam's". After a few drinks, they moved on to a few other clubs. As they were leaving the last one, Connie cries out, "Oh ... read more

And now disco is undead

They brake-dance

The sand crab and the horse shoe crab are the best of friends. They do everything together.

Then one day the horse shoe crab dies. He goes up to heaven and Saint Peter meets him at the gates. Saint Peter asks him if he has any questions and he says no. So Saint Peter gives him a harp, a... read more

a silent disco

Because you don't want them hanging around Parks at night.

This year there’ll be no disco in ferno

When a man walked with a gun and fired a few rounds into the air, but nothing changed


Because there was already panic at the disco

We would have a panic at the disco!!

It was a disco inferno.

The 20 Worst Jokes Ever!

1.Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.


2.A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."


3.Two peanuts walk into a ba... read more

Where did the disco?

His Obnoxious brother: Please Gogh.
His Dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh.
His prune-loving brother: Gotta Gogh.
His Convenience-Store-Owner cousin: Stop'n'Gogh
His Constipated uncle: Can't Gogh
The Ballroom dancer aunt: Tan Gogh
His Nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
His Fruit Loving cousin: M... read more

I'd better get my Nickelback or there'll Panic! At The Disco.

They're called 'Hispanic at the Disco'

Guy 1: Hey!

Guy 2: Hey.

Guy 1: I'm pretty sad, can you give me a joke?

Guy 2: Sure! Knock Knock.

Guy 1: Who's there?

Guy 2: Disco.

Guy 1: Disco who?

Guy 2: Disconnected.

'Your conversational partner has been disconnected.'

Guy 1: ...

As the snow melted, water leaked in. It was the winter of my discount tent.

I was never scared though, I loved disco music

Hispanic at the disco.