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Killers Jokes

I, for one, support these crazy killers dressing up like clowns.

It was a lot harder to see them coming when they were dressing like cops.

I picked up a hitchhiker last night. He seemed surprised that I'd pick up a stranger. He asked, "Thanks but why would you pick me up? How would you know I'm not a serial killer?".

I told him the chances of two serial killers in a car would be astronomical.

What’s one question that’s only asked of high-fashion celebrities and serial killers?

“Who are you wearing?”

What pronouns do serial killers go by?

Man/slaughter

Batman says “If you kill a killer the number of killers stays the same”

Who the hell said I was innocent?

Did you know that British serial killers can't die?

They're immoral, but with tea.

What do serial killers and programmers have in common?

They both love hackathons.

What is the only similarity between serial killers and gamer

**They collect skins**

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A wounded soldier takes viagra by accident after thinking the pills were pain killers

He got battle-hardened by that experience

Mexican train killers scare me.

They have loco motives.

How do you stop serial killers?

Just arrest one of them, and all of them stop.

This wouldn't work if they were parallel killers.

What do both teachers in the hallway and killers say?

"Stop running around the place, kid."

A duo of serial killers got convicted. The sentence caused some debate.

The first one got 25 years. He put his victims in a bowl an drowned them in milk. The other one put the milk in first and got sentenced to death.

According to FBI, the number of serial killers is decreasing every year.

Thanks to those damn lazy millennials who can't commit to a single thing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do serial killers and ballsacks have in common? (nsfw)

They're both nutcases

Why serial killers only kill one person at a time

Coz if they killed more they would be parallel killers.

Detective: What did you find in the serial killers home?

Police: Head shoulders knees and toes, knees and toes

Why are there no pain killers in the jungle?

Because parrots-eat-em-all!

How did Epstien's killers make it look like a suicide?

They used A LOT of coverup

I’ve been searching for two years to find my wife’s killer

So far, nobody will take the job.

I hate cereal killers

they go against the grain

Why is it so hard for programmers to get a prescription for pain killers?

They have a history with codeine.

What do serial killers and people who eat fried chicken have in common?

They both think the skin is the best part.

Most serial killers are men.

That's because women prefer to kill just one man, over a period of many, many years.

A blonde a brunette and a redhead are running away from some killers...

... when they find themselves at the end of a dead end ally. They see 3 burlap sacks and hop in. The killers come over wondering where the ladies are and see the sacks.

One of the killers goes up the the brunettes bag and kicks it. “Woof woof” says the brunette. The killer then says “oh ther...

How many pain killers does it take to heal a Tape?

5 Per Cassette.

Why are there no female serial killers?

Because after the first kill, they have to tell someone.

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