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Killer Whale Jokes

What's with the sudden influx of Killer Whale attacks on boats?

Seems Orcastrated

What do you call a pod of singing killer whales?

An orcapella group

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

By now most of you have heard about the whale attack on the Dutch boating team. What you may not have heard is that it was a Soviet killer whale and that one of the Dutchmen lost the tip of his penis in the attack.

Turns out the whole thing was a Russian orcastration.

Killer whales are great musicians but there's one instrument they just won't play

The orcana

What's a killer whale's favorite pasta?

Penguini

Why did the killer whale go to jail for stealing all the diamonds?

He’s the one that orca-strated the heist!

Have you met my Spanish killer whale?

Mallorca?

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My music teacher constructed a piece for heterosexual killer whales.

That's something I wouldn't know how to orca straight.

What's the difference between a killer whale and a killer dolphin?

One doesn't have to hide the bodies.

What did the killer whale do when the boat came?

Swallowed all the seamen

My friend is planning to do vasectomies on killer whales.

But he prefers the term orchestrating

Why does killer whale feces smell so good?

Because it's shampoo.

What do you call an obese murderer?

A killer whale.

The killer whale planned its attack on the seals for weeks.

It was very carefully orca-strated.

Killer Whales like classical music so much...

That they form Orcastras.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three guys are stuck on an island...

and they come across a magic lamp. One of the guys rubs the lamp and a genie pops out and says; "since you freed me from this lamp Ill reward you all ... now jump off this cliff over here and shout the name of anything, and youll turn into it till you get home." so the first guy jumps off and shouts...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

C-Worthy NSFW

And then there’s the one about the killer whales who got tired of whales getting killed off by fishermen. So a pod of them got together to plan a retaliation.

The pod leader says, “Okay, here’s what we’re going to do. The next time a group of boats come by, we’ll swim under them, use our blo...

A blue whale walks into a bar...

The bartender says "you're too big, get outta here!"
Killer whale walks into the bar, bartender says "hell no, no killers here!"
Then a sperm whale walks in and says "can I stay?"
"Sure" says the bartender, "sperm whales are always whale-cum"

Biologists [find a whale washed up on the shore]

Biologists [find a whale washed]: it’s a new species, what do we call it?................
Bunch o’ surfer dudes walking by: yo! Killer whale dude.....................
Biologists[looking at each other]:...

A New Take on a Classic Joke

The weather outside has been cold as the left side of a killer whale's behind recently, and I decided to buy myself a new jacket. So I went to the mall with a friend to see what jackets there were available.

Unfortunately for me, everyone else in the city had the same idea. We first went to N...

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