A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for £10.00

The boy asked his Dad for £10.00 in bitcoin currency.
The das said "£9.57? What do you need £10.79 for?"

I have started investing in stocks!

Chicken, beef, and vegetable.

One day I hope to be a bouillionaire.

I’ve recently started investing in stocks

I hope this leads to me finally becoming a bouillonaire someday.

I lost everything investing in poultry

That’s what you get for putting your money in chicken stock.

I’d recommend investing in Weed Wacker companies...

They work on cutting edge technology

Investing in an assisted suicide centre has its pros and cons

The service is non-refundable but there are no repeat customers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband and wife go to a therapist

Therapist: So, what’s the problem here?
Wife: He won’t stop making bad jokes.
Husband: She’s upset because I wouldn’t stop investing in Egyptian tourism... until I realised it was just a pyramid scheme.

I recently started investing heavily into penny stocks.

It just seemed to make a lot of cents...

Tim asked his bitcoin investing brother

For $10 worth of bitcoin

B: $9.34? Why do you need $10.35 of bitcoin?


T: I just want to start investing for college?


B: Ok, I just sent you $24.39 of bitcoin for you.


T: Thanks! Why did you give me more than I asked you for?


B: I gave you $15.43...

How do you make a small fortune from investing in Bitcoin?

Start off by investing a large fortune in Bitcoin.

Why aren't farmers investing in flying cows?

Because the steaks are too high.

Quincy inherited a large sum of money at a young age from his father, but he wasted it all on illicit drugs and became destitute and homeless.

It's a cold December night in New York City, with temperatures well below freezing point. Quincy shivers in his one and only winter coat, the same one he's had for the past ten years, lying on a park bench sheltered by nothing but tree canopies. Quincy, in a rare moment of soberness and self-reflect...

[LONG][INSPIRING] America: The land of opportunity

Good Read!
Every morning, the CEO of a large bank in New York walks to the corner where a shoe shine is always located. He sits on the couch, examines the Wall Street Journal, and the shoe shine gives his shoes a shiny, excellent look.
One morning the shoeshine asks the Executive Director:
...

A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday

Dad: What? $6,244??? $5,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $3,782 for anyway?

A crossfit enthused, bitcoin investing vegan walks into a bar...

Oh, they already told you about it too?

A boy asked his bitcoin investing dad...

...for 100$ worth of bitcoin.

Dad: 98.7$ ? , what will you do with 105$? Can't you just think how valuable 95$ is?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NSFW I lost all my money investing in a 2 story brothel.

Too much fucking overhead.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man had 3 girlfriends but did not know which one to marry.

As a test, he decided to give each one 5000$ to see how they would spend it.

The first one went and got herself a complete makover and told him, i made myself pretty with the money for you because i love you so much

The second one went and bought him new golf him new golf clubs, clothe...

I was investing in Monopoly games

Until I realized that there is no real money in them

My account said I'm crazy for investing all my money in my idea of building a business that offers a boxing gym, a dentist, and a manicurist all under one roof.

But I told him I'm going to fight tooth and nail for it. Now if I could just think of a clever name for it, I'd be all set.

Investing in balloons just isn't as profitable as it used to be.

I blame inflation.

I've been thinking about investing in marijuana groweries.

I hear it's a budding industry.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Commenting on a new post is like investing in the stock market

If the post blows up, you probably get shit loads of karma

I started investing in Egyptian tourism

Until I realized it was just a pyramid scheme

A friend was talking to me about investing in property in the Middle East

"Dubai?" I asked.

"No, I can't afford it yet", he replied.

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