Why do pediatricians not like long term investments?
They have little patients.
What kind of investments does a clown make?
Someone at a BDSM convention asked me what investments he should make
I told them to invest in stocks and bonds
Batman invited all the superheros to an evening discussing bitcoin investments
Superman didn't go because it was a crypto-night.
Two Russians meet up:
- Have you heard, Bitcoin went up in value?
- Ya. But I only invest in one thing - VODKA
- Why Vodka?
- Where else do you get a 40% return??
We've all heard of "dogs with jobs." But where do they keep their investments?
When the sun sets every evening, Superman moves all his Bitcoin investments into a regular mutual fund.
He tries to protect himself from Crypto night.
An Investment Banker Was Getting Married.
During Wedding, The Wife Vomits. Husband: "What Happened?" Wife: "Capital Gains Arising Out Of Previous Investment." Husband: "U cheated me.." Wife: "U should know, mutual fund investments are subject to market risks!"