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Donated Jokes

I donated $10 to Bernie's campaign

Don't worry ladies, I also donated $7.80 to Hilary.

I won a million dollars and donated a quarter of it to charity!

I now have $999999.75 left.

Today I donated a laptop, a smartphone and $500 to a poor guy.

Can't express the happiness I got when I saw him putting the knife back in his pocket

A man who donated one kidney is a hero.

Yet I get investigated for donating 10???

I just donated 100$ to a charity for blind children

But I doubt they'll ever see any of the money

Long John Silver just donated us one of his crew members.

Thanks for the stranger kind Silver!

I just donated all your toys to the orphanage

Dad : I just donated all your toys to the orphanage

Son: Why?

Dad: So you'll have something to play with when i take you there.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

We donated my fathers body to science today…

and boy was he pissed.

My ex just donated her eggs and got $3,000! WTF?

I donated sperm and all I got was a weird look from the Salvation Army Santa.

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

Hispanic Attacks

I donated my old basketball hoop to the school for the blind.

It will be missed.

When I donated a kidney, they said I was a hero.

But when I donated 7 more, they seemed a lot less appreciative.

I donated 1 kidney and they called me a lifesaver

I donate two kidneys, they called me a hero.

But for some strange reason, when I donated three kidneys, they called the police.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Can butt skin be donated for skin grafts?

Ass-skin for a friend.

Stone.

Sam died and left $50,000 in his will for an elaborate funeral.

As the last attenders left, Sam’s wife Rose turned to her oldest friend Sadie and said: “Well, I’m sure Sam would be pleased.”

“I’m sure you’re right,” replied Sadie, who leaned in close and lowered her voice to a whisper....

A charitable organization noticed that the richest man in town had never donated.

A representative of the organization called the man. "Our research shows that you make millions of dollars a year, and we were wondering if you'd like to donate some amount to help those in need."

The man responded, "Did your research show you that my mother is suffering from a chronic illne...

I honestly hate how a person who donates 1 kidney is considered a hero...

I donated 4 and I’m somehow a criminal

I donated $50,000 to a charity for mute children.

They didn't even say thank you.

I donated my kidneys

So a week ago i donated 1 kidney to the hospital they were really grateful and i saved a mans life.
So yesterday i donated 4 kidneys to the hospital and now the police wont leave me alone.
Smh
Ungrateful people these days

I donated a kidney last year

They still want to know where i got it from

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The blood you donated...

Is in someone else's boner.

Let that sink in.

I donated my body to science the other day

bast*rds sent it back and demanded a refund

An engineer dies and goes up to heaven.

At the Pearly Gates, St Peter says to the engineer "Sorry pal, you're not on the list. You can't get into heaven." The engineer says "Wait a minute, I always donated to charity, my wife and I raised two orphans we adopted, I attended church regularly, what do you mean I'm not on the list to get into...

They say Jeff Bridges donated a good sum of money to charities after The Big Lebowski…

The Dude Provides!

I donated to a group trying to make all cows go extinct.

It’s a no bull cause.

I recently donated all of my Jerry Garcia memorabilia to the Smithsonian Institute,

it was a dead giveaway.

Donated sperm the other day

Now I have a few 'mil' in the bank

Mark donated 100 chairs to the community center.

It was a very charitable act.

A charity worker learnt that there was a rich man who had never donated anything

So this worker went to the rich man's office, and tried to convince him to give to charity.

The rich man folded his arms and replied angrily. "Did you know my sister's husband passed away suddenly? And left behind 4 children for her to raise by herself?"

The charity worker was surprise...

I donated blood 5 times a year every year

so that I am less and less related to some of my relatives

This gorgeous blonde donated a bedside table to me.

She really didn’t want money, she said it’s just one nightstand.

I donated a kidney last year

Well, I never got to the donation part.. apparently I MUST state where I got it from

Just donated my phone, watch, and the 500 dollars in my wallet to a homeless man

You won’t believe the happiness on his face as he put the gun away

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Scottish blood

An Arab Sheik was admitted to the hospital for heart surgery, but prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to have some of his blood type stored in case the need arose. As the gentleman had an extremely rare type of blood that couldn't be found locally, the call went out around the world.

...

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