UPJOKE
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My local cemetery is working to resell mine and my wife’s burial plots to a new buyer...

We’re in grave danger

My grandfathers favorite joke: what’s the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

The drug dealer can’t wash the crack and resell it

Everyone is buying toiler paper to resell it, but if you want to make real money...

...just resell your already used ones instead of brand new ones.

A man is a millionaire from buying metal rods and reselling them

His friend asks "how do you buy them for so cheap allowing you to make 7 figure salary?"

The man replies "I'm just good at bar gaining"

Dad joke alert

Why do elephants paint there toes red?



So they can hide in cherry trees. Have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? See it works!



Bonus one: what's the difference between a hooker and a dealer?



One can wash there crack and resell it

A Frenchman, an American, and a Bulgarian are asked what they'd do if they had a train car full of apples at their disposal.

The Frenchman replies, "Easy, I'd roam the streets of Paris and gift an apple to every beautiful woman I come across".

"I'd sell the apples, and buy even more with the profit", says the American. "Then sell those too, restock, resell, and so on, until I become an apple trillionaire".

S...

Probably done before: What's a pirate's LEAST favourite letter?

Dear Mr Redbeard,

It has come to our attention that you have been illegally duplicating and reselling copywrited movies without permission.

As such, and utilising the full jurisdiction of the Federal Communications Authority, you are subpoenaed to appear before the Federal Supreme Cour...

For my 3rd cake day I'd like to re-re retell

Resell, retail, retale, resail reset preset presume resume
Assume retell

That my favorite joke is good ol' #788

A Math Professor, an engineer and a butcher goes to their 10 year school reunion

A math professor, an engineer and a butcher goes to their 10 year school reunion. The prof arrives in a small yellow Volkswagen, the engineer arrives in a BMW and the butcher arrives in a Ferrari.

After a bit of small talk the prof and the engineer asks the butcher how he got to buy such a gr...

This week on pawn stars, a man sells a $100 bill...

"I'm Rick Harrison and this is my pawn shop"

"Hi i have a $100 dollar bill that is like to sell"

"hmm i've seen these and i know that the value can vary let me get an expert friend to look at it"

"oh yeah this is a 2016 print $100 bill, it's in fair condition so i'd say it's wor...

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